Try

Time Stone

Chapter 9: Time Stone

It has been a couple of weeks since I was released from the hospital. I'm going to start school again after Christmas break. My sister and I have gotten closer. She's actually pretty cool to be around. She's also kind of funny, in her own way. My mom has changed for the better. She lets me be me, finally. It took a head injury for her not to argue with me about wearing make up. My dad has been working more, way more, to cover my hospital bills. Mr. Melgoza offered to pay for everything, but we all said no. My friends come over every day. I haven't seen Knox since I came home from the hospital. He texts me once in awhile to see how I'm doing. I don't blame him for not wanting to be around me. I would be mad at me too.  I broke his heart and the guy I left him for let me almost get raped. Then I scare him and almost die. So I get it. I haven't been out much. Not because I'm scared, Im just not in the mood to do anything anymore. I thought I was in love. Maybe I was. I just want to start over. I want to pretend that I have the time stone. It's one of the infinity stones that I would use to go back in time. I wish Jasper never spoke to me that night at that party. In fact, I wish I never went to that party. I want Jasper out of my head. He hasn't called, or texted. According to my sister, Troy said he's being distant from him also. So what Jaspers up to, nobody knows.

"B! New Year's Eve party tonight."

Cora yells as she enters my room.

"A party?"

"Yes. You can't keep avoiding life."

"That's not what I'm doing."

"Yes it is. So, let's make a deal. I know how you feel about drinking since, you know, so me, Lani, and Zeek will all be sober with you. Let's just go and dance crazy. Have some fun."

I could tell Cora was so excited to go, and if I said no, she will stay here with me because she feels bad.

"Okay. Fine."

"Yes!"

She starts jumping up and down. I smile and laugh. It feels good to laugh. Maybe this is a good idea. Why wait until midnight? My new life starts now.

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"Brix let's go!"

I hear my sister shout for me from downstairs.

"B!"

There goes Cora now.

We were supposed to leave for the party an hour ago, but I keep contemplating about going. I'm pacing back and forth in my room. Is the room spinning? I think I'm going crazy.

"Hon?"

Great. Now my mom is in my room. I sit on my bed so I can stop pacing.

"What's going on? You don't have to go to the party if you don't want to."

"I do want to go, I think. I don't know."

"Tell me what you are feeling so I can try and help you."

"That's the problem. I don't know what im feeling. Im not scared, or nervous. I think im excited, but maybe not. Am I happy, sad, going crazy? I don't know."

My mom sits on my bed.

"Are you still thinking about what happend to you?"

"Sometimes. It's like a blur. I tried to block it out and forget about it. It's just hard.I see Esme, Cora, Lani, and Zeek happy, and I think to myself I used to be like them. Now I'm just constantly asking myself how I could be so dumb and let that happen to me."

"Brixlee Rose, you are not dumb or stupid! You are the smartest, courageous, beautiful, and most subburn person I have ever met. You know what you want and you go for it."