For the first time in a very long time, I wake up in the middle of the night and I do not feel afraid. Normally, I would check if my door and windows were locked, then make sure the security team is fine and try to get a few more hours of sleep.
I always think of what my life would be if I had chosen a normal life instead of a show business one. It would be better if it wasn't for all the weird letters and times people tried to get into my house and even my bedroom. I do not get a good night of sleep since.
The security team helped a lot, but I know most of them just think I'm paranoic. They can think all they want to, as long as their work is done. The sergeant was the best hire I could ever dream of, though. Before him, I had never seen someone so dedicated and focused.
However, I do not regret stealing his focus from the mission. How could I not fall in love with the man that was done nothing but to keep me safe for the last few months?
He is the reason why, tonight, I am not scared. Tonight, I wake up at 3am only to find him by my side. Holding me like I am the most precious thing he has ever held on his arms, even during his sleep. My sergeant. My safe place.
Jan/23
