Goodbye beautiful // King Roan

Chapter 14

Roan and Echo entered the tower first. Then me and the guards behind me with the prisoners. My trident was still in my holster, my hands untied, walking freely. We came to the pathway that led to the dungeon and Roan stopped, turning towards me. The guards continued on down the corridor.

"Take the prisoners to the dungeon." he told me and mentioned for Echo to hand the keys over. Taking the keys from her I realized that it was a test. A test to prove my loyalty. Nodding at him I catched up to the party heading to the dungeon. I was at the back and I was glad for that. I already knew that they would stare betrayed at me when I locked them in. I stopped in the shadows, letting the guards handcuff them. My eyes were somewhere else, hating what I was doing, but I had no choice. I wouldn't put my head before theirs. I wasn't ashamed of that, survival was the only thing I ever cared about.

The guards exited the cage and I grabbed the bars and closed it. The sound made them all look at me, betrayal, hurt flashing in their eyes. My expression was cold and hard, no emotion showing as I locked the door. I began walking away.

"What happened while you were here?" Kane suddenly questioned and I turned to him.

"What are you saying?" I replied back, unsure if he was accusing me of something.

"I saw that you stood in front of Roan. You were protecting him." he stated with a fierce gaze, "Who's side are you on? Because right now it sure damn looks like you're on theirs."

I walked closer to the bars, looking him dead in the eyes. "I'm on no one's side. I made a deal with him, Kane. The only way for me to survive is to work for him, being his guard."

"So you'd rather fight for him than help us?" Abby questioned, almost offended. "But what about our people? Are you just going to let them die?"

"My people were slaughtered." I looked over at her with an icy gaze and an edge to my voice. "Until you came I was on my own. I had to hide my true identity in fear of Azgeda trying to kill me. Now I don't. So yes, I'm thinking of myself before your people."

"After everything we did for you?" Kane asked, baffled.

"Don't act like I did nothing for you." I snarled at him, " I helped rebuild Arkadia. I brought you food that could've lasted me years. I made sure that Roan didn't break your deal. Don't say I did nothing for you!" With that I left the dungeon. Stepping out of the dungeon I took a deep breath, finally being rid of the terrible smell. I probably ruined every bond and alliance I had with the Skaikru. But at the moment it did not matter, as long as I worked for Roan I could never put them before him.

I began walking towards the elevator. Now that we ruled the tower I did not care to be careful. I headed up to my room and closed the door behind me. One place that was familiar to me, one safe haven. I dropped my holster and satchel onto the table. The flap on the satchel opened and my things scattered across the table, but I didn't care. Taking off my belts I hung them over the chair before stepping out on the balcony. Sucking in a deep breath I let it out slowly. I walked over to the railing and leaned against it, watching the city. What would be left of it after the brewing war? After the radiation?

For a long time I stood there, trying to be in the present. Who knew how long I would have left. I had to savor this moment for as long as possible. My gaze followed a bird flying across the sky and I enjoyed the warm rays of the sun. If I made it to the bunker this could be one of the last times I felt the sun in five years.

"Khalida?" I suddenly heard someone calling and I left the balcony, finding Roan standing by the desk. His gaze watching my things scattered all over the table. I stepped back inside my room and he looked up at me. "I need you at a summit."

"Sure." I answered and walked towards the table. Taking my trident I put it on my back and fastened the belts around my torso. I hastily began putting the things back in my satchel. In the corner of my eyes I saw Roan picking something up.

"What is this?" he asked as I put the metal jars in my bag. Glancing up I recognized the item as a golden pin.

"Just a pin. We get it when we finish our Westari training." I shrugged and closed the flap, everything packed now. I smiled lightly at the memory. It was so long ago I finished that training, I remembered how happy I was when I graduated. But I was also a bit shocked, I didn't even know I still had the pin.

An icy realization washed down my spine. Our names were engraved in the back of it. Turning to Roan with wide eyes I saw him turning the pin around.

Fuck.

I watched as his brows furrowed in confusion, then realization sank in. His jaw slackened, eyebrows relaxed and his eyes held a glint of something I couldn't understand. Slowly turning to me he shook his head. "No, it can't be true." I held my breath waiting for him to do something, say something, kill me, anything at all. What scared me the most was that I had no idea how he would react to it. "Celestina."

I backed away from him. At that moment I was ready to run, break our deal and become wanted again. Twisting around I sprinted at the door, my heart beating hard against my chest. Panic flashed in me, blood pounded in my ears. So close, just a few meters left. Grabbing the handle I was ready to get out of there when the door was shut by a hand. Before I could comprehend what had happened I was turned around, my back pressed against the door and a knife to my throat. Roan towered over me, eyes flashing dangerously. And for the first time I was really afraid. I think he saw that too, I think I had my facades down. I don't know, I was just so scared that I could barely think. I was paralyzed. The cold blade against my throat was the only thing I could concentrate on..

"Is it true?" Roan hissed in a whisper, eyes searching my face. "Answer me!"

"Yes." I managed to say. "Yes, I'm Princess Celestina."

A short sigh escaped Roan as he removed the knife from my throat and took a step back. My tense body relaxed as I let out a breath I did not know I was holding. Roan began pacing in front of me, a hand dragging over his beard. He was deep in thought, wondering what to do now. My gaze watching him in confusion. Why didn't he kill me?

He then stopped in front of me again, gaze watching something in front of him and he chuckled. My eyebrows shot up. He chuckled. "You knew all this time."

I didn't know what to say so I stayed quiet. Another sigh left him. "Come on, we need to go." Dumbfounded, I nodded and followed him out the door. I was still processing what just happened and walked quietly beside him. He must've noticed because he said, "We have a deal, I'm not going to kill you."

I looked up at him with furrowed brows. "Why?"

"I still need my best guard." he answered while looking at me. There was soemthing else, I could see it in his eyes. But I didn't dare let myself hope.

We entered the elevator and began the trip down. Finally getting to my senses I pulled the walls up again, controlled my emotions and expression. When the doors opened you couldn't see a trace of emotion on my face. Exiting the building we met Clarke outside. She looked at me with a bit of betrayal in her eyes. I ignored her.

"She's not allowed to come. Indra said that you had to come alone." Clarke said as we stopped in front of her. Roan looked over at me with his blue eyes.

"Go to the Azgeda quarters, the others are there." he only said and I nodded before leaving the pair behind me. The walk to the Azgeda quarters wasn't long and I entered the courtyard.