𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 | 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐨𝐧

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚎𝚗

My sentence was light compared to what Mr. Nolan gave me at the meeting. I had to admit it—I missed Dalton and Meeks. I wished I wasn't so stupid for going through with the whole sleepover thing. I knew it was a bad idea!

I spent too much time in my room grieving my previous life I had. I loved sneaking out at night to go read poetry. God, it sounded so geeky, but it was perfect. It was like my therapy. Now, all I had was a pen and paper. No Meeks. No Dalton. No one to tease me for every second I breathed.

I finally gave in, throwing my notebook to the side. Curling up into a ball, my knees tucked into my chest, and my face buried into myself, I finally let myself cry. God, Charlie would have such a heyday with me now if he were here.

Damn it, Charlie.

My breath soon slowed its pace, letting me have a sense of bliss. I glanced at Charlie's sweater. The words 'Welton' were embroidered onto the soft gray fabric. I picked it up, holding it to my chest. Hugging it, I found it smelt of cigarettes and oud.

I couldn't catch a break. I tossed the sweater into my bed, wanting to fight my feelings away. Was I in love with him or something? Why was every single little thing reminding me of Charlie? Was this some sick joke?

I knew I had to go back there to see him. We couldn't end our friendship because some stupid old man said so.

A few days after my little breakdown, I took Carla with me to go to Welton. We would journey through the front doors so I could get Mr. Nolan's permission. If I gained his trust and respect, then I would be able to see Dalton. Though it killed me inside to do so, I would do that for him. It was the least I could do.

Carla was there to see Pitts, of course. They weren't dating... at least, not yet. I stood in the doorway as she snaked her way down the hall. I supposed she figured I would follow her, but I felt sick. I didn't want Charlie being expelled because of my selfish acts.

"Ms. L/n!" I heard a familiar voice and turned to see Mr. Keating. "How are you doing? Here to see Mr. Meeks?"

I gave him a soft smile, not sure how to respond. I felt like if I talked, I'd get Charlie in trouble.

"Dalton?" He continued, and I shrugged.

"I," I paused, not sure how to say it in words. "I don't want to get him expelled, but he's my friend. I miss him." I could feel my eyes well up with tears. I pushed them down, angry at myself for being sad over some boy.

"I heard what happened." I knew he would. Charlie probably told everyone about how he almost got expelled because he had a girl in his bed. "I believe your story, Ms. L/n."

It made me happy to know that someone was on my side. I understood what I did was stupid and wrong, but I didn't do anything with Charlie. He was sweet. He gave me his bed out of the kindness of his tiny little heart. He took the hard wooden floor. "Thank you." That was all I could muster up.

"How about you step outside, off the grounds of the school, and I will go get Mr. Dalton." Keating proposed, making smile even more. "I'll be quick, I promise."

"Thank you, sir." I replied, wiping the tears from my eyes.

"You can thank me by writing more poems." He paused. "The boys shared with me some of your poems, I hope you don't mind, but you have a bright mind. Keep at it."

I didn't know whether to be infuriated or proud by his words. I chose the latter. "Ok, will do, sir." 

I did as Keating told me. It was starting to get colder out, so I wrapped up my coat around me and looked around—waiting. I heard the doors open to see Charlie walking outside as if he owned all of Welton. "You really couldn't get enough of me, huh?"

"Shut up, idiot." I responded, pulling him into a hug once he got to me. "Just shut up."

I heard him chuckle, holding me closer to him. "Don't blame yourself, okay?" He finally said as we pulled away from our embrace. He looked me in the eye, still smiling. "Okay?" 

I didn't respond for a second, trying to find the words to say. Until, I ultimately gave up. "Okay."

"Damn, you really look sad." He laughed, looking deep into my eyes. I looked away quickly, my face turning a deep red. "It's okay! Hey," I turned back to look at him, trying to hide my pain. "You're allowed to be sad, doll."

"Doll?" That made me laugh. "Since when do you call me doll?" I paused, watching as his face began turning red. It must've been a slip. He tried to play it cool, but I could tell. "Idiot."

"I'm not an idiot, y/n." He shook his head, still looking at me with that intent stare. "Only occasionally." He looked at me as if he hadn't seen me for years. I thought I knew what he needed. So, I hugged him again and he hugged me back. "I think you're the idiot. You can't get enough of me."

I pulled away quickly, folding my arms in front of my body. "Is that your only line, Dalton?"

Before he could respond, we saw the doors open again, and Meeks came running out. "You chose Dalton over me? How dare you!" He joked. Once he reached us, he also pulled me into a hug. His was much more awkward.

"I did not!" I sort of lied. "Keating's the one who got Charlie, not me."

"Sure, sure." Meeks nodded, not believing any of it. He then leaned in close to me. "Pitts and I made a radio." He said in a hushed tone. "I wish you could come inside. I'd show you. It's so amazing."

I smiled at him, honestly thinking that was impressive. "I wish I could go back there too."

"Why haven't you come to our meetings?" Charlie interrupted us, now hitting me with the harder questions. He looked dead serious, too. "Are you scared?"

"No," I didn't know what to say to him. I guess I was scared that Nolan would find out and expell Charlie. Then again, if he found out, then everyone would get in trouble... right? "Yeah, a little." The two boys laughed at my confession.

"You're scared of a little old man with a stick up his ass?" Meeks asked. I shook my head, my eyes ti the floor, but my lips turned to a smile. "Then what?"

My smile dropped a bit when Charlie said what I had been thinking, "She doesn't want to get me expelled."

"I do." Meeks teased, reciving a whack from Charlie. Meeks dodged out the way last minute, chuckling to himself.

"Whatever fear you have of me getting expelled, let it go. You can't control what Nolan does if he finds out. Plus, if he finds out, he'll probably expell me anyway. It wouldn't be because of you."

"Carpe Diem." Meeks added.

Charlie was right. Dead poets society was already a secret, and it would be kept that way. "I'll think about it." I finally replied.

"Good enough for me." Meeks smiled, thinking that my maybe would turn into a yes.

"No." Charlie stopped him, still staring at me. "No, it's not good enough." Charlie got down on his knees, clasping his hands and holding them up to me. "Please, y/n! Please." He begged, and I started to laugh. "Come to this next meeting. Please!"

Meeks did, too, but he quickly joined him. After some time of them begging, I agreed. "Fine, fine. But get up, this is embarrassing."

Meeks got up quickly, dusting off his clothes. Charlie was slower, his face twisted into a smirk. "See you then, l/n."