By Your Side (Zuko x Reader) (Sequel to Torn Heart)

Chapter 14

My POV:
I had reached our room to find it empty, so I paced back and forth, fighting down my panicked, spinning thoughts.
Aang is dead. You saw him die, Y/N!
But didn't I want my friend to be alive? Yes, of course...but no, he needs to stay dead! My Ra, what was happening to me? When did I get so damn selfish!? I should be excited, relieved, but I'm panicking.
That moment, the door flew open and Zuko strode in. I opened my mouth to speak, but no sound would come out, my anxiety nearly choking me. He didn't seem to notice that I stood there anyway, until he was a few paces from me and started as if I had appeared from thin air.
"Y/N?" he said, as if this wasn't my room too.
"Zuko, we need to talk,"
"I know,"
"You know?"
"Y/N, I don't know what we're going to do, but I swear I won't abandon you, okay? I promised we'd stay together. I don't care what he says—"
"What who says?" for a moment, my anxiety halted in favor of pure confusion.
"What?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Didn't you want to talk about my father?"
"Uh...no. What's this about your father?"
Zuko's face went slack, "Oh, um...Y/N, he doesn't like you. He wants me to break things off."
"What?!" I cried.
He continued, hurriedly, "B-But like I just said, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to figure something out."
I nodded, relieved. I even longed to embrace him, but then,
"What did you want to talk about?"
Nothing, forget it, is what I wanted to say, but no, I had to see this through. I grasped Zuko's hands, "Zuko, be honest with me please. It's about Aang. Is there any chance—any at all—that he could have survived?"
The look on Zuko's face answered it for me. It was identical to a look he had given me nearly three months ago in that cave—part horror and cold-hearted betrayal and part pathetic plea for forgiveness. Like that day, my body went numb. "I think you know, Y/N," was all he said.
"No, no, there's no way—Katara's spirit water?"
Shit!
Even as Zuko nodded, I continued, mostly out of desperation, "B-But that can't bring back the dead!...Can it?"
"I don't know..."
"Well, we have to find out! We have to find him!" I rambled, even knowing how ludicrous it was to ask this of Zuko of all people.
I tried to pull away, but Zuko had me in an iron grip, and he stood motionless as a statue, "Zuko, come on!"
"Y/N, don't leave. Please?"
"Zuko, don't be ridiculous. This is important. I have to find Aang. If he's alive—"
"He's not, okay?"
"What do you mean he's not?" I laughed despite myself, "We just got through saying...Zuko?"
My blood ran cold at the look he was giving me. I barely recognized him. His right eye was wide and staring me down. His mouth was set in a firm line and a muscle ticked in his jaw.
"Y/N, this is why Azula gave me credit for killing him. She knew...somehow..."
"What are you talking about?"
"I just barely gained back my honor, my home, my throne, everything. If my father found out the Avatar survived..." he broke eye contact with me for a moment and I saw the scenes flash across his face, "It would be even worse for me that it was before. Y/N, you have to understand that."
"What did you do?" My voice trembled.
"I kind of...sent an assassin after Aang,"
"You 'kind of' or you 'did'?!" I demanded.
"I did, okay?!" Zuko exploded, "I sicced an assassin on the Avatar, so he's definitely dead now, so let's just drop it!"
But I wasn't dropping it. "Why?! How could you?!"
"Y/N, you would have left me if you knew he was alive!"
"Maybe—or maybe I wouldn't have! You stole that choice from me when you went behind my back. We promised we would stay together, but you trust me so little that you think I would just leave you like that!"
Zuko seized my shoulders so tightly I whimpered and shook me, "I know you would have! I can't afford to lose you! I can't—I won't! No matter the cost, I won't lose you, Y/N!"
All at once his face went slack as his eyes focused again on me—the hot tears pouring down my cheeks, the fear on my face. As soon as he had stilled, I fought my way out of his grip—he didn't stop me—and ran for the door. I turned back for a millisecond in the doorway and Zuko still stood with his back to me, staring at his hands.

No One's POV:
Y/N didn't return until early in the morning, before the sun was even up. Somehow, Zuko had fallen into a restless sleep, but was woken by shuffling behind him. Assuming, Y/N was finally getting into bed, he rolled over, groggily, "Y/N? I wasn't sure you'd ever..."
His eyes focused on her standing at the bedside, a large bag in front of her that she was stuffing dresses into. Her bow was already slung around her shoulders and her quiver tied to her belt. "What are you doing?"
"I'm leaving," she said, stiffly, as if trying to hold back her emotions.
Zuko started to struggle into a sitting position, "Well, hold on, I'll go with you—"
"No, I need to go by myself," she turned her back on him.
"W-Why? Where are you going? When will you be back?" Zuko knew even then that these were stupid questions.
Y/N sighed, exasperated, "Zuko, I'm not coming back. I meant I'm leaving-leaving, for good,"
With that, she grabbed her bag and headed for the door.  Panic clawed the rest of the sleepiness from Zuko's head, and he launched himself out of bed, "Wait!"
But he froze at the end of the bed, completely lost for what to do or say, except, "Y/N, I love you."
She paused too, one hand on the door handle, "I know. And I love you too, but...Azula was right. I don't belong here. It was a mistake to come, and I want to correct that. Goodbye, Zuko."