'JUST THINK OF IT AS LEAVING EARLY TO AVOID THE RUSH.'
In which an angel, a demon, and their adoptive daughter decide to stop Armageddon. Except it's days away, they've lost the antichrist, Heaven and Hell are both breathing down their necks, and th...
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Armageddon is discussed, a child takes nap, and two immortal idiots get very, very drunk.
***
The Angel, the Demon, and their daughter had chosen St. James Park, right by the duck pond, for their rendezvous. When Crowley and Freddie had arrived, Aziraphale was already waiting for them. They found him standing by the water and tossing seeds to the birds.
"Papa!" Freddie called, running over to Aziraphale, who embraced her readily. Crowley slunk up behind them, resisting the urge to beam in a very Un-Demonic way.
"Oh, how are you, my dear girl?" Aziraphale asked the five year old, who was bouncing around him with excitement.
"I'm good, Papa!" Freddie exclaimed, "Daddy gave me a cookie with breakfast!"
Aziraphale smiled indulgently. "Well isn't that lovely? Cookies are just delightful."
"They're so yummy," Freddie agreed enthusiastically. Aziraphale chortled in amusement. She was so young, and innocent, and excited about the world in the way only little children were. Such vivacity was a wonderful thing to witness.
"Um." Crowley cleared his throat to announce his presence, then said, "angel, we need to talk."
"Yes, yes, I rather suppose we do," Aziraphale agreed. "Freddie, dear, why don't you go play in the grass for a bit while your father and I have a chat?"
"Okay!" Freddie said brightly, running off to watch the ducks and see if she could spot any ducklings, while staying within sight of her fathers, of course. She knew how they worried and fussed when she was out of their view.
Aziraphale sighed. He and Crowley sat down on a bench. The pleasant demeanors they had been keeping up for their child's sake slipped to reveal the tension that was truly there. "You're sure it was the antichrist?" The Angel pressed.
Crowley scowled. "I should know, I delivered the baby. Well, not 'delivered' delivered, y'know? Handed it over."
Aziraphale shook his head, as if unable to believe it. "An American diplomat? Really? As if Armageddon were a cinematographic show you wished to sell in as many countries as possible.
"The Earth and all the Kingdoms thereof," Crowley confirmed.
"We will win, of course," Aziraphale said, looking at him.
"You really believe that?" Crowley questioned.
Aziraphale tilted his chin upward in a slightly snobbish way. "Obviously. Heaven finally triumphs over hell. It's all going to be rather lovely."
