Besitos

26

"I feel like we haven't seen each other much lately." Luke says, bringing me back to reality.

Its Friday night and instead of being with my friends, we're on my couch with some takeout and a terrible girly movie on. It used to be our usual Friday night tradition, but lately I've been busy with Lila and Mac, so its turned into an every other weekend thing. I can tell its bothering Luke a little but he's trying to stay respectful at the same time since he was the one who told me to reach out to them.

"I'm sorry." I say, but I don't fully mean it. "Its just been nice to reconnect with my band."

"I can't imagine." he muses.

For some reason this annoys me, but I play it cool. Lately Luke has been a bit annoying and clingy, but I'm trying not to hold it against him. We went from seeing each other almost every day to now seeing each other maybe three times a week. I get that he feels clingy when we're together because he misses me, but when we're together all I'm thinking about is how much fun I had with Lila and Mac earlier that day.

"You ever seen this movie before?" I ask trying to change the subject.

"Legally Blonde? No, not that I remember. Have you?"

"I think once when I was younger. I always wanted to get into a prestigious school so I could use the quote 'What, likes it hard?' when someone asks how I got in." I say.

"Did you go to college?"

"Nah, we were already signed by time I was college age." I say. "It never even crossed my mind."

"That must've been weird, to be so young and already be a famous band."

The weird thing about Luke is that even though hes good friends with Tony and has been around musicians before because of it, he has no music background. He doesn't know what its like to be in a band or on tour at all. Being in a band, you usually have friends who are always in bands, so its weird to have an outsider look into your life and point out the weird things about it, like being famous at 19.

"It's not, like, weird. Its just different. You get used to it pretty fast at that age, though." I say. "Its weird now that I'm not in a band. My whole life revolved around it, and now there's this big empty space."

"You could always go to school now." Luke points out.

I scrunch my nose up at his suggestion. "I don't have any interest in it. I could probably find a hobby or even give drumming lessons, but school just isn't for me."

"You don't feel like your life is just, passing you by?" he asks me.

"No, I don't." I say a bit too annoyed. "I was part of one of the biggest bands in my genre, I've been on tour for almost ten years straight. I experienced more life than most people have or ever will."

"No need to get so defensive." he says.

"I'm not." I say. I blow out a deep breath of air. "We officially disbanded today."

"What? Why?" 

I shrug. "It was just time."

We talk about it for about five more minutes and then turn our attention back to the movie, even though we both don't enjoy it, but I guess its beter than our almost forced conversation.

The entire time we're together all I can think is how much better our relationship was before my old life came back. Since the old life has been here, the new life doesn't feel as free and fun as it used to. Instead it just feels ...boring.