KEEP DRIVING - H.S

Chapter 10

September 24 2021, Chicago I

BOOING. THAT'S ALL ALLIAH HEARD as she stepped onto the stage. From every side of the stadium, people screamed insults. Screamed slurs and made comments about her.

Alliah sang anyway. "If you feel lonely, I could be lonely with you." Her voice faltered when she heard someone nearby scream 'bitch'. She ignored it and kept going. Alliah moved around with a confidence that came naturally when she was on stage. "Why are we so complicated, maybe love is overrated!"

When she got to the instrumental break, she sang her line, "It always feels like...". Alliah jumped around on stage, feeling the ache in her unhealed knee.

Somewhere in the crowd, someone screamed a slur at her. She ignored it and kept dancing. Like Taylor Swift said, Shake it off.

"I need more. Jesus christ you're so confusing," Alliah sang, using all of her willpower to stop herself from bursting into tears. "If we keep score. Bet my money that I'm losing!"

Alliah finished her lyrics, and used that moment to catch her breath. And then she felt it. That pressure in her ribs, the squeezing of her lungs and the lack of air. The feeling that there was a panic attack coming along.

Alliah used her breathing excercises. Inhale. 1, 2, 3, 4. Hold. 1, 2, 3, 4. Exhale. 1, 2, 3, 4. Repeat.

Just as she managed to prevent herself from having a panic attack mid-performance, the sight of a platinum-colored object flying through the air startled Alliah.

Alliah stumbled backwards just in time to avoid the heavy metal bottle from hitting her in the feet. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

Alliah felt her hands shaking, and the tears escaping her eyes. She felt hands on her shoulders, pulling her back.

Alliah barely registered the security guard tugging her back, and the other security guard stepping in front of her protectively. She didn't understand what was going on until she saw four men- security, holding back a brunette girl who looked like she was in her early twenties.

Everything else became a blur.

***

Alliah felt cold water dripping onto the carpet through the gaps of her fingers. All she cared about was the freezing cold of the ice cubes in her hand. They'd shoved it in her hand, desperately trying to calm her down. Alliah wasn't sure who exactly had given her the ice. Every face seemed to be distant and blurry.

And then her dressing room door slammed open. Alliah jumped, dropping the ice cube onto the carpet.

Harry made his way over to Alliah, kneeling in front of her, capturing her gaze. "I'm so sorry, Alliah. I really am. I talked to them- to the fans, and hopefully they'll back off. I'm sorry."

Alliah sobbed, shaking her head as she clenched her eyes shut. She felt Harry embrace her, and Alliah buried her face in the crook of his neck as she cried. Harry smoothed down her hair, shushing her warmly.

Harry's touch was comforting. It was steady, and the anchor Alliah needed. And maybe it would calm her down eventually, but in that moment, all Alliah needed was a shoulder to cry on.