Behind the Scenes

11

Freen's POV

I ran away.

I didn't know what to do. I panicked and just left her there.

What was I supposed to do?

She kissed me.

I felt like everything in my world shifted after that kiss.

She likes me like that?

In all honesty, although I was aware about people shipping us or saying that we're like a couple, I never actually thought about it happening.

Not until she kissed me.

Everything I thought, changed.

I always thought that I'm straight even though I was starring in a GL series. It's quite normal for actors/actresses to start from doing BL or GL even if they're straight.

I also thought that it was the same for Becky.

There are many things I got wrong. And I realize that now.

What did I do?

I messed up everything.

I wanted to go back to her but I didn't have the courage to.

So I just left.

Stupid.

When I left, it was like my head was empty until I reached my house. And then, when I finally sat down, every emotion I had started pouring. I was crying because, how did I not know? Am I really this naive?

I was also angry with myself because of what I did. I left her. I fucking left her and did not even had the courage to go back.

Because of that, I didn't know how to approach her anymore. She doesn't deserve a useless person like me.

When the staff took notice of this, Nam was the first person to confront me.

"What happened? Everyone's worried" she said to me.

"I fucked up" I said, quietly.

"I'm not in any position to dictate you but you shouldn't run away. If you can't reciprocate her feelings then just say it. Don't prolong this. Be honest. You always say that she's like family to you but you're just letting her hurt like this?"

I started to feel tears running down my face.

"Whatever decision you make, just make sure that you'll treat her carefully. Because, to be honest, the way you're acting now is exactly what Beck fears most of all"

I stayed quiet, crying.

Then, Nam hugged me.

"I messed up" I said, in between sobs.

"You can still make it right. Talk to her, there's things that you can only fix if you can just be honest" 

"Thank you" I said, pulling out of the hug

"So, what do you plan to do?"

"I need to talk to her but I don't know how to approach her"

"No problem, I'll help you"

After that, we planned out what to do and Nam said she'll set it out and that all I needed to do was to be there.

When the time came, Noey and Irin also volunteered to come because they were all worried about us. They went to Beck's house to get her and when they arrived, I saw how hurt Beck was.

She was crying so much and it hurt me even more thinking that it was my fault that she's feeling like this

I mustered up all my courage to call her.

"Becky" I said.

"Freen"

When she said my name, I completely lost control.

I instantly cried. My tears were constantly rolling down my face and I immediately ran to embrace her.