Living is always better with you by my side | Choni

I always worry

Even five years later, Cheryl will sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, confused. For a moment, she panics. Her heart starts to race, she feels a sweat break across her palms and a tightness form in her chest.

The darkness of the room is claustrophobic and isolating. With her hand, the redhead blindly searches for something solid to ground her and quickly lands on the wooden nightstand beside her.

She feels across the surface and finds a lamp, which she moves to turn on before having the startling realization that she's not alone.

A strong arm circles her waist and finds its resting spot at her hip. Cheryl turns in the other direction and looks just below her. She squints and can just barely make out a head of brown, tousled curls with the signature pink streak. Her Toni.

Cheryl sinks back into the bed and feels her breathing start to even out. She pulls the covers back over herself and presses her cheek against the other woman's chest. She doesn't need the lamp on to confirm what she already knows she will see, who is always there when she wakes up like this.

She's safe.

Five years has passed. Five years since they gave their relationship another shot, over a year since they got married.

She thinks of all they've experienced together in these past years. The countless dates, parties, drinks with their friends and of course, hours spent making love.

She recalls the two of them packing up Thistle house after Toni had finally asked her to get an apartment together. She remembers the effort Toni put in to ensure that Cheryl thought the apartment was perfect and viewed the apartment as her forever home.

She reminisces about those wonderful following weeks when she discovered the utter joy she experienced from doing mundane things with Toni in their home.

Suddenly, those quiet afternoons spent doing very little with Toni if not, nothing at all felt just as precious as their glamorous nights out in Riverdale.

To this day, Cheryl still experiences a giddiness when returning after work to find Toni waiting for her.

Perhaps this is why she wakes in the middle of the night so often. Perhaps the feeling in the pit of her stomach is actually fear, not confusion. Fear that one time, eventually, she will wake and it will all be gone. She will be back in that awful mansion, all alone with that overwhelming sense of loneliness inside her.

The thought is incredibly bleak. Cheryl can't help but shudder.

There's a rustle in the bed sheets that breaks the redhead out of her thoughts. She hears Toni exhale deeply, the hand on her hip rubs affectionately.

"Can't sleep?" The brunette's voice is low, but warm and comforting.

Cheryl bites at her lip, "Go back to bed, it's late."

Toni's laugh rumbles through her chest, "I could say the same to you. Too much on your mind?"

A heat builds behind the redhead's eyes, "I'm just being silly," she says as her voice breaks.

"Darling, where's this coming from?" Toni tilts Cheryl's face up to look at her, "Did something happen?"

"No," the redhead laughs through a couple stray tears, "Everything is fine, more than fine."

The other woman gives her a look, "I wish you would tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking..." Cheryl laces her hand into Toni's, "That I'm happy. Beyond happy."

A smile threatens across the brunette's lips, "Really?"

"Really," Cheryl kisses her cheek, "Don't worry about me."

"I always worry."

Toni settles back into bed and brings Cheryl with her. Their bodies tuck into each other perfectly. The redhead finally relaxes as the brunette's arm drapes around her shoulders. She's almost asleep when she feels a kiss at her temple.

"I love you," Toni whispers.

"I love you too."