To the Moon and Back

17. The Moonrise

Xie Lian hesitated, but still went ahead, "It's just, I couldn't find you anywhere. When I was discharged from the health check-ups you had disappeared. No one would give me your contact details – breach of confidentiality, they said. So I – ", He sighed and closed his eyes.

"I went to Jiuquan, told them we were friends... same. They laughed at me, saying, if we're friends, how come we don't have each other's contacts?", he smiled and shook his head. They were on the Moon just the two of them, with communicators: they never thought of exchanging contacts.

He went on, "I had to ask around. It seemed you were working hard throughout the whole graduate program, no one knew how to get hold of you outside classes", he pffted a little laugh, "And you told me to call you to go out and get wasted together..."

"Anyway. Somebody remembered your hometown. There, they said you had gone to Shangcun Village, in the Naozhou Island. In Shangcun someone said you got a place just off Nanxin Village instead... You see, I couldn't just go to the police or something, so I had to keep asking".

"That's why it took me three months to find you", he looked around and added, "When you said you were going to a 'remote' beach, that's what you meant I guess: hard to find".

The sun had set behind the hills opposite to the sea, the sky was cobalt blue, making Xie Lian look also blue. It took three months for Xie Lian to find him, Hua Cheng thought, but why? He probably had never been in love before and thought it'd be a 'no hard feelings', 'let's stay friends' if they met again.

It wasn't as if Hua Cheng hated him, he just... Even now after all this time and all the effort he put to forget, seeing him just made him want to hug Xie Lian and never let go. And reminding himself he shouldn't, it got him back to that last night on the Moon, and he was feeling that pain all over again.

Xie Lian said softly, "I've made my mind about you long ago, before I even set foot on Earth", he paused, "Didn't I say to you, at Tianzhou? When I opened my helmet and shouted, so the flight recorders wouldn't – "

That's right, Hua Cheng had completely forgotten about it! Well with everything that happened after touchdown, with him wanting to get away from Wenchang as soon as possible...

"I didn't hear it", Hua Cheng said.

"What?"

"I didn't hear what you said", he repeated, "We were entering atmosphere on that hunk of junk spacecraft better known as Tianzhou. It vibrated like hell, and my ears hurt and got blocked too", he paused, then added, "Sorry".

"Oh I see", Xie Lian replied, looking more helpless than ever.

Hua Cheng, stuck in his own feelings, started to realise why Xie Lian looked hurt: whatever he said was important enough for him to open his helmet at that time – then, not knowing Hua Cheng didn't hear it, he never saw him again. Well, he rejected me first, Hua Cheng thought.

"Don't apologise. I got the wrong place and the wrong time. San Lang, you were so distant after that last night we were together on the Moon. You told me it was anxiety, but I kept thinking about it and... well I realised much later that I must have expressed myself badly, again. And you got – "

If it wasn't for the lamp post by the road where Xie Lian had stopped his motorcycle, they'd be in complete darkness, the black night over them, a warm breeze coming from the sea.

"I'm sorry San Lang. I didn't mean to hurt you", Xie Lian said.

He was the first to admit he was bad at expressing himself, described by everybody, even his friends as detached, keeping himself to himself, no one knowing what was on his mind, not having much contact with other people... Still, he had been perceptive enough to realise something was off.

Hua Cheng felt ashamed: he always excused Xie Lian in his head, but it was him who got it all wrong, and assumed the worst. And not only that: he thought he was rejected, and had to move on, and came here to live wildly, trying to forget Xie Lian. And Xie Lian himself had all reasons to believe he was rejected, but didn't give up and kept looking for three months till he found him!

He couldn't see Xie Lian's face clearly, the lamp post was at his back, giving him a bright yellowish outline: he looked like a human eclipse.

He gave a sad smile and said, "Well San Lang. Good to see you, you look well".

Then he nodded and turned to go, but Hua Cheng grabbed his wrist.

"What, what did you say, what did you shout at Tianzhou?"

"Oh", he replied, realising of course Hua Cheng didn't know, he hadn't heard it at the time. "I said, hum, it was the first time I was happy to go back to Earth. Because of you".

He looked down in embarrassment, Hua Cheng was sure he was blushing too, his cute blushing he knew and loved so much! He pulled Xie Lian to him and held him tight, burying his face in the crook of his neck. Xie Lian was caught off-guard, then wrapped his arms around Hua Cheng's neck and ruffled his hair.

"Gege, I missed you so much", he whispered on Xie Lian's ear. Xie Lian hugged him tighter.

They stayed like that for a long time, then just kept looking at each other with silly smiles on their faces, Hua Cheng holding Xie Lian around the waist, Xie Lian caressing his cheek, brushing his hair off his face – he then looked far ahead at the horizon, widening his eyes in amazement.

The most beautiful Moonrise: a huge, deep yellow Moon shining over the black night, reflecting on the dark sea. Xie Lian kept looking at it as if hypnotised, and Hua Cheng put an arm over his shoulder, looking at the Moon but most of all looking at him. His eyes sparkling in wonder, his smile.

"San Lang, I never saw a Moon like that!" he said, and Hua Cheng pffted a laugh, hugging him tighter. Xie Lian never lived much, and Hua Cheng wanted to give him everything he's been missing. He wanted Xie Lian to see many and many Moonrises like that: he loved him so much.

Xie Lian nested himself in his arms then seemed to think of something, and pffted a laugh too. He looked at Hua Cheng and said, "What's that expression again? San Lang", he paused with a naughty smile, "I love you to the Moon and back!"

Everyone was waiting for this too, I know! 😍

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