𝐌𝐫 𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐤𝐲 𝐓𝐰𝐨 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐬

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷

A suspicious egg walks into a bar reserved for outlaws and villains only, holding a bag of gold. Everyone eyed him curiously, some having the urge to just take the gold and scram.

"Where can I find the Softpaw Sisters?" He asked the bartender.

"Second floor, last room." He replied. The egg nodded his head and began walking upstairs and down the creepy hallways. He opened the door, to be greeted by darkness.

"I am Humpty Alexander Dumpty, and I am in search of the Softpaw Sisters." He said, cautiously walking into the room. You opened your eyes, annoyed that someone woke you up from your nap. Your younger sister, Kitty, leapt from her hammock and landed on the table, in front of the egg.

"What for?" Kitty asked, her rapier now drawn and pointing at Humpy. You leapt off your hammock and had your daggers at the ready.

"A revenge mission." The egg simply answered, plopping down a large bag of gold.

~Timeskip to when you first meet Puss~

You silently followed behind Puss, edging closer to the room the infamous Jack and Jill were staying.

"Holy friojes! They do exist!" Puss mumbled. You tried breathing as quietly as possible and the barking dog was not helping.

"Ever since you fell down that hill and broke your crown, you have been talking crazy." You heard Jill say to Jack as she shaved his face. You saw him carve out an outline of himself and carefully put it aside as he stepped in. You marveled at his talent, but simply used your claws to pick the lock on the window and you slowly and quietly opened the window.

"Hey, what gives?" He angrily whispered to you. You hissed in response and entered the room, sneaking closer to the beans.

"No!" He whisper shouted, jumping on the bed, and landing on the floor, before getting closer to the beans.

"You, you, you stop where you are." You ignored him and turned to face the beans.

"Those beans are mine." He whispered aggressively. You did a hand gesture to show that he should snap their necks. He looked around in confusion.

"Me?" He asked. You pointed at him, frustrated at his inability to understand what you were trying to tell him.

"You snap me?" You did the gesture again, hoping that he would finally understand, but he was still confused.

"You, snap me?" He growled at you, and you growled back. You edged closer to fight him, but a bullet struck between your paws. That was your sign. You quickly ran to the window, closed it and hopped down, waiting for Puss to fall. He landed, and Jack shot another bullet that nearly hit Puss, signaling that part 2 was starting. You threw a rock at him to get his attention.

"You are going to pay for that!" He shouted angrily. You did a backflip, and landed on the edge, close enough to a nearby rope. You twirled your dagger in your hand, holding onto the rope with one hand. Puss ran closer to you, in an attempt to catch you, but you cut the rope and the chase began. You ran faster towards the glitter box, nearly slipping on some tiles. You saw that he was following and did a graceful flip, landed on the ground and continued running. You were almost there, when Puss suddenly swung in front of you and crashed into a fruit compost pile. You tried not to burst out laughing, and continued to run. You hopped down the hatch and landed gracefully, Puss landing on his back a few moments later. He looked around, very confused. You gave a small cough, and threw your cape away, the next part of your plan working very smoothly.

"Those magic beans were my score. You just caused me a chance of getting the golden eggs, mi amigo. Put up your paws." He said to you. You almost laughed at how ignorant he was. You began your usual starting position for the dance fight.

~Time Skip to after the dance fight~

You looked at him with a smirk, he had nowhere to go, and his rapier was gone. He suddenly grabbed a guitar out of nowhere and hit you. You groaned in pain and clutched your throbbing head, taking your mask off.

"You hit me in the head with a guitar?!" You exclaimed, your head still in pain.

"You uh...uh...you are a woman? Woh!" He stammered, impressed.

"Amateur." You sneered, before walking towards the shabby curtains that lead to your sleeping quarters.

"Señorita, wait! Let me buy you some leche! I am a lover not a...fighter." You heard Puss shout behind you. You quickly scaled up the walls and jumped onto your hammock.

"Hello? You are hiding from me? I like to play the games too. I sense in you a kindred spirit. A..." You heard him say. He took a sniff of the air around him. "I smell something familiar, something dangerous, something breakfasty." You saw Kitty roll Humpty out, before silently creeping back to her hammock.

"It's been a long time, brother." Puss heard a voice behind him say.

"Maldito huevo." Puss muttered and drew his rapier and pointed it at Humpty.

"Humpty Alexander Dumpty. How dare you show your face to me!" He growled, his rapier pointing closer to him.

"I know you're angry, you have every right. But it is good to see you, Puss." He said, walking closer, but got poked in the head with a rapier.

"Are those new boots?" He asked nervously.

"No! They are the same boots I wore when you betrayed me." Puss sneered.

"Be...betrayed you? You left me cracked in pieces on a bridge, surrounded by soldiers! They wrote a song about it!" He argued.

"And how did we get on that bridge in the first place?!" Puss yelled.

"Because we were brothers and brothers are supposed to look after each other. Not..."

You jumped down, with Kitty landing on his left and you on his right.

"Humpty. Remember why we're here." Kitty said.

"Remember me?" You asked, twirling your dagger in your paw.

"I should have known. I had the magic beans in my grasp and you sent this very...attractive devil woman to interfere. You are a curse on my life!" He grumbled, putting his rapier away.

"Woh! Woh! Wait! Here me out, okay? Yes, yes! I sent Y/N to bring you here. But she is no ordinary thief." He explained, and you took your gloves off to reveal that you could fluff up your paws to create an effect that made you feel like you were touching nothing, yet, you still had sharp claws, which Kitty didn't have. "She's Y/N Softpaws, the softest touch in Spain, basically like Kitty but with claws." Kitty didn't seem to be too happy about that, and she toold a deep breathe in.

"That's a lot of heel for a guy, don't you think?" You asked, holding up his boots. He looked down and saw that they were indeed missing. You smirked and threw them at him.

"Look, with Y/N and Kitty's skills, your sword and my brain we've got a fighting chance here. Puss, come on. You of all people know that nobody is ever ripped off the giant's castle and lived to tell the tale. You want to survive, you need a plan. And I've studied this job my whole life, you know that." Humpty said convincingly. "Alright, let's...let's...let's be honest, without me you don't even know where to plant the beans, Puss. But Jack and Jill do, they're on their way. We go up the beanstalk outlaws and we come down legends. So what do you say? Partner?" He finishes holding out his hand.

"No, never again." Puss said, walking off.

"I'm sorry, okay? How long are you going to hold a grudge? It's been seven years! That's like thirty five cat years! You need me! And I...I need you, Puss." Humpty yelled desperately, the plan slowly beginning to fail. "You got any idea what they do to eggs in San Ricardo prison?" Humpty asked, and Puss stopped as if to think about it for a minute. "I'll tell you this, my friend. It ain't over-easy!"

"Adios, Humpty Dumpty." He mumbled, and left the Glitter box.

"No, no no! This was not part of the plan." Humpty groaned, trying to think of something to get Puss back.

"Don't worry. I speak meow~" You smiled. "Meet me on the roof of the Glitter box in about 20 minutes."

"Be quick." Humpty said, and he and Kitty went up, while you ran to catch up with Puss.

Word count: 1457