lost

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i feel lost.

i'm only twenty one.
yet i feel so much older.

i feel like i have lived for so much longer.
i feel like i have lived a million times over.

and yet i feel lost still.
with no direction.
with no destination.
i remain lost.

and i am afraid that i will remain lost for all of my ages to come.

is this the life that was promised to me?

if it is... then fate is playing a cruel game with me.
it is as if fate is playing me himself.

i wished that fate would simply leave me be.

i know i am lost.
i wish to be found.
but i don't know if fate would let me.

i feel tired.
i wish to rest.

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