Pose

[Chapter 9]

'And how are we feeling today Ash?' 'Like I want to throw you with a shoe.' 'That's.. Progress I suppose. At least I know what you're feeling. So, Why do you feel that way?' 'Because I have to be here staring at your abnormally calm ass.' 'Alright.. We'll have to work on your language...' 'That's not going to change.' 'Alright. I'll take a note of it.' Zaiden puts a hand on my back before the Woman smiles at me. 'Why are you smiling??' 'Because I'm happy. We're making progress..' 'No we're not I'm only opening up because he's here.' I point to Zaiden before he leans back smiling. 'Oh not you too.' 'What??' 'Quit smiling.' 'Why? I'm allowed to smile.' 'Not around me.' 'Why? Because your like a thunderstorm?' 'Yes!' 'Well.. Like Katy Perry once said. After the hurricane comes the rainbow-' 'Shut up!' I turn around shoving him so as not to hurt him before I find myself laughing at his stupid joke. 'You're such a jerk! Let me grieve in peace!' 'Grieve what??' 'The death of my Joy!' 'It's not dead yet though. Just in a coma.' '.. Why do I feel like you're about to say something stupid-' 'And I can be your life support.' 'Damn it! I told you not to!' 'And yet you let me.' 'Because it feels nice..' 'What feels nice Ash..?' I look over at the woman pointing a finger at her. 'You be quiet for a minute! I'm going to ignore you're even here actually. And you!' I point at Zaiden. 'I have no words for you..' 'Did I take your breath away?' 'I will throw you with scissors-' 'That sounds.. Like a lesbian thing.' I sigh giving up and laying my face in my hands. 'What is wrong with you!?' 'A lot of things actually- Maybe I should get a therapist- Since you're not using yours-' 'I thought you don't like therapists.' 'Actually yeah, Nevermind.' 'Then why am I HERE!?' 'Because you need mental stability and it's your last time anyway.' 'Fucking Irony-' 'It's not about me, it's about you.' 'So Ash.. From what I hear you're pretty strong..' 'Yeah, I can beat your ass if you don't shush!' 'Why don't you use that strength for yourself..?' I pull my ears down as I think about it and a memory of my dad pops up. I don't want Zaiden to know about that.. Not yet at least.. 'Because of my dad..' 'What did he do..?' 'Nothing. I'm not Saying i with Zaiden in the room-' 'Ash.. Please.. I'm right here if you need me. Just talk to her. I won't judge you or anything..' 'I-I-.. Fine.. I don't stand up for myself because when I was a kid.. Standing up for myself meant Andrea or my mother would get hurt.. Protecting them meant I would get hurt.. And I was fine with that second option..' 'Well.. They're.. Well.. Andrea is safe now. You can use your strength for yourself when you need it.. And it's okay to feel scared.. stressed out.. Angry..' 'Lady you sound like a robot. Do you even FEEL??' 'Of course I do. I get very angry-' 'Lemme guess, You put your anger into positive energy and do something creative-?' 'Exactly..' 'Lady, When I'm angry I punch a wall! I make wall art. I put it into something productive too.' The woman Sighs taking her glasses off before she gets up walking out of the room and I just smirk before Zaiden messes up my hair. 'Fuck off!' The lady eventually comes back before sitting down. 'I think.. were done for today.' 'For today? Today was the last I'm going home.' 'Well.. I'd like to think you're doing better.' 'Sure, Go home to your wonderful carefree life with your family lady.' Zaiden looks at me before glancing at the therapist. 'He.. does have a point.' 'It's not about me-' 'And this is why I hate therapists.' Zaiden sighs before getting up to walk off before the lady stops him. 'Zaiden.. You're famous, How could you possibly not have a carefree life?' 'Okay fuck the hell off with that shit, That is a stereotype.' Zaiden walks off and I follow him to his car before Zaiden steps into his car with me following and I place a hand on his arm as he goes to start the car. 'Are you okay?' 'Yep just glad we're finally getting you outta here. I can see why you didn't make progress.' 'Yip.' Zaiden drives us back home and the whole time I'm just staring at him. 'Why.. do you keep.. Staring at me?' Zaiden finally breaks the silence trying to keep his eyes on the road. 'Are you really okay??' 'Yes. I'm really okay.' 'You don't seem like it..' 'I'm okay really..' 'Are you-' 'Yes, I'm sure.' When we finally reach the house Zaiden walks off to his room closing the door and I go over to ask what's wrong as I hesitate knocking on the door. Malikai runs over before staring at the door. 'Aw.. I wanted to ask him to play Violin.. Why did he close the door..?' 'I.. Why don't you go ask Aunty Andrea. I'll ask Zaiden and let you know.' 'He trusts you a lot huh?' 'I-.. Yes.. I suppose he does..' Malikai smiles before running off and I knock on the door. 'Zaiden.. Can you open the door..? Malikai wants you to play him something on the violin.' The silence is almost deafening between the door and me before I get a shiver down my spine and I bad feeling to I turn away from the door holding onto the frame. I'll fix the door later. It's kinda locked so it is necessary. I kick the door in and I find Zaiden curled in a ball on the floor. I walk over to him leaning down as I notice his claws digging into his skin. 'Fuck.. Uhm.. Zaiden.. Are you okay??' What am I supposed to do..?? I try to get his arms away from himself but it's no fucking use he's like 10 times my own strength. I try shaking him to get him to try and focus on me but he just ignored me as he starts apologizing repeatedly. 'Zaiden it's.. It's okay really.. C'mon.. Think about Malikai...Or.. or Lizzy..' I start to panic before I go to close the door to avoid Malikai seeing and I go back over to Zaiden and do the only thing I can think of. I force myself between his arms and Hug him around his waist causing him to let go and hug me instead. I sit there for a little while trying to think before I notice Zaidens phone and I grab it going to his emergency contacts since I can't unlock it and I call Clide. He should know what to do right?? He's known Zaiden for a long time. After calling Clide he Shows up pretty fast and Comes over to Zaiden forcing him to stop hugging me and trying to calm him as I sit slightly in the corner watching. Is.. this what he felt like..? Watching me panic..? Did I.. hurt him..?? That's why he punched the wall.. Eventually Zaiden calms down but he looks utterly exhausted so Clide puts him on his bed before looking over at me. 'How long was he like this?' 'Maybe.. 20 minutes.. I think?' 'Okay.. Just keep an eye on him.. I'm going to go get bandages for his wounds..' Clide walks off and comes back wrapping the bandages around Zaiden's arms before leaving again, but not before warning me to keep an eye on him, so I do. I watch him the entire time making sure he doesn't panic again. I eventually pass out from exhaustion, I guess I slightly cried myself to sleep with worry. I wake up before I notice Zaiden's arm wrapped his arm around my waist and I'm in his bed. 'Zai-.. Zaiden..' 'mhm?' 'You- You're... holding me..' 'And..?' 'I-.. I- I- just...' 'You looked like you needed a hug.. I couldn't let you sleep on the floor..' 'Zaiden let go!' 'No.. You're comfy.' 'How would you know if I'm comfy??' 'I don't. I mean as in You're comforting.' I raise my ears a little before I just lay back dwon and he pulls me closer. 'I-' 'Shhh.. Just go back to sleep.' 'That's fucking creepy!' 'Only if you make it creepy..' Zaiden goes quiet again And I sigh trying to back to sleep which eventually I do pass out. Well, until the door gets swung open rather loudly by Andrea. 'Where's Ash have you seen him!?' 'I'm here...' I poke my hand up since Zaiden's back is facjng the door and he's basically covering me up hiding me from the door's view. 'Oh my- Thank the gods... Oh my gods! What are you doing!?' 'I was trying to sleep- Since I'm kinda being forced to be here.' 'Ash you do know you can get pregnant right??' 'I- ANDREA! NO! We're not doing anything!' 'Whatever you say.. Guess I'm just glad you're out of your room.' 'Exactly so don't come over yelling at me.' 'Whatever.' Andrea leaves closing the door that's not even properly shut anymore from me kicking it down. I flop back down before I hear Malikai nearby and flopping down on Zaiden's chest making me flinch at the movement before he gasps lightly. 'That's where you've been! Morning!!' 'Morning kiddo..' I sigh rubbing my eyes before I notice Zaiden wrapping an arm around Malikai and turning over to face my trapping Malikai between us and he starts tickling him so I join in. 'No! Stop!! Lemme go! Aunt Lizzy!! HELP!' Eventually Malikai escapes and I sit up while Zaiden gets up running after him and tickling him on the floor making me laugh. He's actually a really good dad.. I wonder if I'd be a good dad..Or mom? I guess Parent. I suppose. I stare over at Malikai and Zaiden before Clide comes bursting in the room. 'ZAIDEN! You are not going to believe this..!' I perk my ears up staring at him before Zaiden gets up and gets dressed before following Clide and I follow not long after. We head straight for the living room and sitting on the couch is a guy in a suit leaning back as if he owned the place. Clide stares at him looking pissed. Understandable.. The guy is known for being a prick.. Now I understand why Clide didn't think Zaiden wouldn't believe it. Because not even I do.. As soon as he sees me and Zaiden he sits up right staring at me and Trying to keep the annoying smirk on his face. 'Oh.. I see.. HE's in the band as well.' 'Of course he is. He's as much a part of us as anyone here.' I notice Zaiden's hand turn to fists and his claws start digging into his hands. 'Why are you here??' 'I came to make you an offer.' 'Offer how?? What could you possibly have to offer me?? I don't need money, managers or any workers so what do you have to offer me??' 'It's about Nate. He's suing and right now.. He's winning. So, I make you a deal. I'll-' 'Get the fuck out.' I find myself blurting out at him as he looks over at me. 'Excuse me?' 'I said get. The fuck. Out. You're a lying manipulative prick!' I notice Clide and Zaiden are now staring at me confused as they look between me and the man. He starts to walk closer to me and I turn my hands to fists as he approaches me leaning into my face. 'Say that to my face. Beta. Or should I say Omega??' I grow a smirk on my face. 'Beta. You should know, after all you brought me into this world asshole. So get. The fuck. Out.' Yip. Meet my dad. The one responsible for my mother's death and most of my suffering. Zaiden and Clide's faces reveal their realization of who the guy is before he grabs me and I twist his arm pinning him to a nearby wall. 'I'm quicker thanks to your bullshit when I was a kid.' 'Ash Stone! let me go you little-!' 'uh uh uh. You don't want to ruin a business offer with THE Zaiden do you? After all your business is SO important. More important than a Mother!' 'Your mother was useless. She was a fucking Omega, You and Andrea were supposed to be Omega and Beta not Alpha and Beta. Your sister was a mistake. I LET you take the hits for her..' I see the smile forming on his face. pissing me off before I grab him by the collar and drag him over to the pool while he tries to scream in protest. 'Say that again. I dare you dad. Actually no, You don't fucking even deserve the chance to repeat yourself. Much less the title of a father!' I toss him in the pool holding him under for a while until he stops squirming enough before I pull him back out. He starts coughing trying to breathe And I stare at him before smirking back at him lifting his head by his chin. 'Don't.. Come back here.. again.' He grabs my wrist tying to move me but I shove him back down getting up and stepping his hand down. 'I told you to leave!' 'Okay! Okay! Fucking let go!' I lift my phone before he pulls away and gets up beginning to walk away until he pulls out a gun. I perk my ears up staring at him as I start to walk closer. 'You don't scare me.. Look at you.. You're shaking worse than an earthquake..' 'Get the fuck away from me ! I should've thrown you to the wolves Long ago!' 'Oh.. But you did throw me to them. I just learnt to tame them.' I grab the gun putting it to my head staring directly at him. 'Go on and shoot me! Since you want to so badly. I just hope you'll see my mother's face every time you fucking remember me!' He suddenly pulls the gun away and starts running, Bolting for the door before I try to catch my breath from fear and I notice how badly I'm shaking now. That was fucking fun though.. Zaiden suddenly comes running and he grabs me pulling me into a hug with Malikai next to him. I notice Zaiden shaking too and I reach my hands up to his arms. 'Don't.. Don't do that again!..' 'You saw that..? How much did you see..?' 'I saw enough..' I hug him back before I calm down as he holds me. 'I knew he wouldn't do it..' 'What makes you so fucking sure??' I look up at Zaiden Smiling. 'The look on his face.. It was the exact same face of fear and regret after he shot my mother..' 'And what if he DID pull the trigger!?' 'Then.. I guess I would've had to pay for my own cleanup?' 'You fucking- You're nuts!' 'Nah.. Just angry..' I notice Zaiden's grip get tighter and I just lean in closer pulling my ears down. Did I.. Fuck up..? Did I almost.. hurt Zaiden again..? 'Please promise not to put yourself in danger like that again..' 'I-.. I- can't-' 'Ash promise me!!' 'Okay! Okay.. I promise..'