Angel In Disguise

four

Angelica's POV - october 15th

The first week I was here I spent the majority of it crying. I'd cry in my sleep, and in the shower. I'd cry walking behind Abby as we scavenged for plants and herbs. I just couldn't stop crying. My eyes did it on their own.

I spent every other moment planning my escape, which didn't get very far. The doors are impossibly locked and those keys would never leave her body. I was stuck here because my body against hers would never win in a fight. She had me beat in every physical and mental aspect. Abby must have endured a lot of trauma to end up the way she is, my heart almost feels bad for her.

On week two I felt angry all the time, and that slowly bled into week three. She treated me like a worthless piece of trash. Like I was some dumb child she couldn't be bothered to look after. I did our laundry and cleaned the ground she walked on. The sad part is I never had to be told twice. I'm a weak pathetic bitch.

By the fourth week, I felt empty and hollow. I barely ate, something Abby started to notice. But could anyone blame me? I was homesick, I lived on that island for far too long to feel safe anywhere else. I missed Ellie and I missed my garden oasis. I felt stuck. I felt trapped. I wanted to die. I wouldn't mind if she killed me.

It would probably be better than the small talk we made. I think Abby got tired of the sulking because she'd try and talk to me about the weather or some dumb shit.

"The leaves are turning orange and red. Happens every fall."

"We need to pick up the pace Angel," something she started calling me. "Look at the sky, it's going to rain. Probably a thunderstorm coming."

While I appreciated it to an extent, I hated it all. I wanted to like Abby because after spending the past five weeks with her, I could see she wasn't a bad person. She was just doing what she had to do. Maybe it wasn't right to do, but necessary.

This is where things got confusing for me. Was I wanting to be her friend? After she kidnapped me? Made me kill innocent animals? Pushed my body past its threshold in regard to training? She was doing this on purpose I bet. Does this make me a bad person? I shouldn't be thinking this way but I can't help being a people lover.

I woke up this morning to yet again another note taped to my door.

My door hasn't been locked for over a week.

'Clean the kitchen, mop the floors, and dust the books.'

Seemed like a short list but I knew better than that. She wants it to look like something simple, but if I don't go above and beyond she'd lash out at me. I think it's just the people-pleaser in her. Abby is very detail oriented. Like she's afraid to make a mistake, a bad impression.

The kitchen and the living room take the longest to clean today. Abby is always tracking in mud, something I'm not used to compared to the sand back home. It's October now so it's been fairly rainy out lately meaning the ground is soft. Abby has been teaching me the ins and outs of the area here, and in general. I've only ever lived in one season.

But today is Tuesday meaning yesterday was hunting day. Every Monday I accompany her to hunt and every time she smirks at me as we carry the week's kill in our hands. But yesterday she carried it on her own, something about needing the workout. I didn't complain.

So, I spent most of yesterday picking berries. I found an abundance of elderberries and blackberries. Abby eyed them warily, telling me that if I somehow poison myself and die, she'd kill me. I almost wanted to laugh but just turned around quickly. The feeling in my belly was almost foreign.

I decided my extra chore for the day would be spending the afternoon making jam. I miss it dearly and after all the blackberries I saw yesterday I couldn't pass it up. Here soon fruits like this won't be in session. It shouldn't take long either. As I boil down the berries in sugar water, I sit at the bar top and read a random book I plucked off her shelf.

I find myself not even reading, just thinking about everything. I seldom go out of my way to talk to her, afraid I may cry.. or die. I barely speak, not even sure if I have a voice anymore.

But Abby has no problem using hers. Whether she's talking to herself or yelling at stuff around her home that pisses her off.

Sometimes I jump in my spot if she gets exceptionally loud. I just hum to myself and continue trying to ignore her. I don't think she likes it when I react like that. She has no room to be upset though, it's not my fault.

But towards the evening I can feel a pool of wetness in my underwear and I internally groan. Thinking about what I'm supposed to do. She'd be home soon and I didn't want to bombard Abby with it. I grunt, setting my face on the cool wood counter, wishing I could just ignore it.

Laying in my bed waiting for her to come home I fall asleep, being woken up by her knocking on my door.

"You make that?" She glances towards the kitchen and I nod. Afraid I wasn't allowed, maybe she wanted them for something else.

"Smells good, how do you eat it?" She smiles and I bite my tongue.

I've never seen her smile, feeling dumbstruck I get up carefully knowing I have underwear pooling with blood. I cringe at the thought, I need to bring it up soon.

After cutting the puff pastry I was somehow able to pull off, I heat the oven and glaze each piece with the jam. Smiling at how pretty they each look.

"Should be ready soon." I smile at her, only a small smile. And she nods, heading to her room and starting her shower.

"Hey Abby," I trail off and she looks my way just as she strips her shirt off. I take a deep breath.

"What." She smirks and I can feel my cheeks turn a dark shade of red.

"I started my period.. and I don't know where the pads are."

She reaches into the cupboard under her sink and hands me a new box of tampons. I look the box over and scrunch my brows.

"Tampons? I don't understand." I have never felt so stupid in my life. Why couldn't she give me a box of pads?

"Are you being serious right now? You don't know what a tampon is?" Staring at her blankly I tell her to forget it.

She puffs a breath and opens the new box, pulling out the instructions and explaining it to me. Her cheeks are a deep shade of pink and she doesn't make eye contact. Weird. She looks kind of cute.

She ushers me out of her room, shutting the door in a hurry. I place the tarts into the oven and head to my room so I can hurry and change myself.

I hardly understand the written instructions but I'm pretty sure I put it in correctly. Abby's explanation made a little sense. The feeling is so foreign and I stand still for a few minutes.

Deciding to go to sleep I turn the small lamp off, and quickly take the tarts out the oven for Abby. My uterus cramping too much to want dinner or anything remotely solid.

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i tried so hard not to rush anything. i wanted a slow burn vibe i'm too impatient