Unraveled

Saying Goodbye and Hello

"I thought you said no churches," Gillian hissed in my ear. We were ducked down in the bushes at the side of the church. The lot was empty.

"Shut up," I snapped at her. I'd found the key to the church in my duffel bag when I'd been searching for a gram I'd thought I had.

I stood up once I was sure that the coast was clear and led them to the side door. I unlocked the door, pausing for a moment to see if an alarm went off, and then pulled the door open wider for Jacob and Gillian to duck in.

We walked past the Sunday school classrooms and to the main section of the church. The doors were already open and as I walked down the aisle towards my dad's office, Jacob lay down on one of the pews, letting his feet drape off the end. Gillian walked behind me.

I jimmied open my dad's office door, walking around his desk to the safe. Gillian opened his mini-fridge, stuffing her bag full of the drinks and snacks he kept in there.

"There should be more in that bottom file cabinet drawer," I told her as I scratched my head. I held my breath as I put the code in. Hopefully he hadn't been smart enough to change it.

I let out a sigh of relief when the lock clicked. There wasn't a lot of money inside, but it was enough to get us by for a little while. I stuffed it into my backpack and slung the bag over my shoulder.

As Gillian raided the file cabinet, I walked out into the church and back into the hallway. In the coatroom, there were boxes of clothes for charity. I rooted through them to find some better winter clothes for us.

As I pulled out a jacket, I backed up to see if it would fit and ran into someone.

"Damn it, Jacob, stop sneaking up on me!" The light flipped on. I spun around to see my dad standing in the doorway. "Fuck."

"Silent alarm," he said, holding up his phone. On it, I could see Jacob sleeping on the pew and Gillian inspecting a hymn book.

I swallowed hard, tightening my grip on the backpack. "We'll leave."

My dad's eyes ran over me. I couldn't read his face, but I knew that I looked and smelled like shit. His eyes came back up to meet mine.

"Can I hug you?"

I stared at him. After leaving three months before, that wasn't what I had expected my dad to say when he saw me. I looked away, scratching at my arm. The infection in it had been getting worse, but we didn't want to go to the emergency room in case they would report us.

"I—" Gillian's scream cut me off.

I brushed past my dad and ran to where she stood over Jacob. A needle stuck out of his arm. He wasn't breathing.

Gillian was crying as I dropped the backpack on the floor and pulled out the Narcan we'd gotten at a clinic the month before. My heart was racing in my chest as I quickly took the caps off and sprayed half of the liquid into each of his nostrils.

I tossed it to the floor, leaning over him and starting compressions. "Shut the fuck up, Gillian!" I snapped. She was still crying but managed to calm down the screaming. "Goddammit, Jacob, breathe!"

I could vaguely hear my dad calling 911, but I was staring down at Jacob's lifeless face. Tears were streaming down my face, but I didn't stop the compressions except to breathe into his mouth.

My dad grabbed my shoulders as my body started to shake. He pulled me off Jacob and I started to fight against him when I realized he had another dose of Narcan. I wrapped my arms around my stomach, watching as he gave it to Jacob and started CPR again. Gillian's hands latched onto my arm as she buried her face in my chest. My eyes stayed on Jacob.