Unraveled

A Proposition

The world was shaking. At least it felt that way. Maybe it was an earthquake. We didn't have those very often and we did, it wasn't anything major. I was just going to stay asleep, my arm around Billie, for as long as I could.

"Dammit, Shawn, wake up!" a voice hissed.

I groaned before I cracked an eye open. "What?"

"Your dad called me. I told him that you were fine, but he's downstairs," Jase said before he backed away. "Get dressed and go do some damage control."

I ran a hand over my face as he left. Billie stirred next to me, resting a hand on my chest and looking up at me.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I said as I slipped my arm from under her. "I'll be back."

I kissed her forehead softly before I stood and pulled my clothes on from the night before. I glanced back at Billie, who was hugging the pillow and watching me sleepily. I gave her a small smile before I slipped out the door.

On my way downstairs, I paused in the bathroom to make my hair look somewhat decent. My dad had gone from being an under-involved parent to a helicopter parent when I'd gotten out of rehab. I'd also lost all his trust. That was something he probably should have withdrawn long before I left home. Better late than never was how it always went.

My dad stood in the foyer, his hands on his hips as he watched me come down the steps. His jaw was set, just like when his team was making a play that wasn't up to his standards.

"You should have given me more heads up that they were coming," I told him as I reached the last step.

"I didn't know."

"You can't expect me to forgive them."

"That's up to God. It was an opportunity for us to be the bigger person and to show who you've become despite what they tried to do."

I leaned against the banister, crossing my arms over my chest. "I have no interest in trying to prove something to them."

Dad ran a hand through his hair. "You didn't drink or anything last night, did you?"

"No."

"Swear."

"I swear."

We stood there, looking at one another. He was trying. I wasn't going to deny that. It wasn't enough, though. I kept relying on people to help me. Deryk to calm the depression. Jase to supply the escape. Jacob to help score. Now Billie to escape. The itch was growing and the longer I stayed at home, the worse it was going to get.

"I think I need to move out. I know that you and Will are concerned about my sobriety because of school, but there's never going to be a good time, Dad."

He shifted his weight from foot to foot. "I know."

"I'll go to meetings. I'll check in with Will. Eventually, I need to move on with my life, though." We both winced. My addiction was a life-long battle. "Wrong choice of words. Eventually, I need to learn how to live life with addiction."

"You can stay in our pool house for a bit," Jase said. I hadn't noticed him walk in from the kitchen. "A trial run."

"I'd still be relying on someone, though."