Little Girl Blue - 𝐖𝐋𝐖

𝐈𝐈. Eros - ThirtyEight

I watched her bent over while she took a break. Even from the drab air, a sweat broke across her skin that showed how long she'd actually been up. I was surprised being it was five in the morning.

The tall women caught her breath and got back to work arranging canvases and framed photographs. It wasn't until she went to slide another one she saw me, and her breath altogether hitched.

I would have done the same. It was such a contrast from not even 12 hours ago—our shower fiasco—and now I was covered completely—hijab and all.

"Florence," her eyes peered to the scarf folded over my arm and stood erect. "Should I leave?"

Half sleep, I didn't bother to answer. She would find a way to continue elsewhere in the space even if I did. At least when I walked away she picked up the canvases as opposed to sliding them to make less noise.

Taking the fabric from my arm I unfolded it in the right corner of the room, adjusting my stance accordingly.

It wasn't long before the language poured from my lips. With each movement, I was moved into the words—the awe of Allah. I was sick, he made me strong. He's given me friendship when I've needed it most. When I fled, he was patient for me to come back to Him. How could I be so ungrateful? So forgetful of what I have now compared to what I've had ever.

God revealed to me love. That selfish one Jane called some time ago. My thoughtlessness tripped me into it without noticing.

Allahu akbar. After my  final movement I collapsed, overwhelmed and tired. I've received so much mercy and now I was feeling rewarded. My face smushed against the scarf was starting to stain it with tears.

The floor behind me creaked, my position only barely letting me see her moccasin covered toes. "You ok?"

I nodded as a droplet fell down the curve of my cheek.

"May I sit?" Her voice fell in a kind of whisper. I could tell she was being cautious.

"I'm okay Jane. These are happy tears." She slid down the wall and kicked her legs out. She was  anxious and antsy. With it still being dark, only half of her silhouette was captured. What I could see of it were soft eyes that longed for rest, not just sleep.

This time she nodded and slid closer where I could finally see all of her. Jane did a kind of half smile before swallowing, "I hope I didn't overstep by listening but it sounded beautiful."

I clawed at the t shirt that had sleeves past my fingertips. I looked up at her, trying to not get winded from that gaze. "I was reciting a part of Al-Imran: "Our Lord, so forgive us our sins and remove from us our misdeeds and cause us to die with the righteous."

She let it be quiet before a response could or would come. And without waiting, I folded up the makeshift mat and retraced my steps back to the attic.

__________

Just around lunch we had some burst of energy. Suddenly there was music and the faint smell of coffee. Jane was up again, failing at being subtle while digging in the closet. I stayed in bed with a small blanket draped over my head, the scarf was long gone.

"I promise you I've tried to be quiet."

I chuckled, rising from the mattress with a scraggly yawn. "No worries, I'm awake for good this time."

She stopped her scrounging and took the teacup of coffee nearest to her. "I'm glad you've been getting some rest. I was afraid my home remedies were beginning not to work."

The mention caused a shiver to break out across my back. Symptoms were lurking always and it was a good thing that I had even just barely made it to the clear. "Yeah..." I peeled back the sheet and scooted closer to her. "And what about you? Have you been sleeping at all?"