I Can't

Part 7

TW! Self harm, eating disorder, throwing up

Dream's POV (cont.):

Once we got to the hospital they took George and told me to wait in the waiting room. I found Tom and the others and we sat there anxiously. After what felt like forever, a doctor came out.

"Are you with George Davidson?" He said, approaching us.

"Yes we are, is he okay?" Toby said shakily. I had been staring at the wall for the past hour, I hadn't realized how bad Toby had gotten.

"We've found damage to his esophagus, along with tooth decay, and his body temperature is unusually low."

"What does that mean?" Sap interrupted.

"These are all signs of bulimia."

My heart dropped. Why wasn't I more persistent? I knew he had an eating disorder, I knew it! Why didn't I say anything else? What if I could've prevented this?

It was silent for a moment.

"Also, do any of you know if he was dealing with suicidal or self harming thoughts?"

"..what?" Tom whispered.

Sapnap looked at me in fear.

"I noticed before we came. When he passed out, I went to check his pulse and saw the scars," I said quietly.

"Scars?" Toby said, his eyes shot to mine, his voice trembling.

"Yes. Both of his arms are covered in what appear to be self harm scars. After he recovers, we will prescribe therapy."

It went silent again.

"Can we see him?" I asked.

"He's unconscious right now, but yes. Which one of you is closet to him? I think it's best if we do one person at a time for right now."

We all looked at each other.

"You should go Dream. You are the closest to him," Sap said.

"I went on the ambulance too. I- Sapnap you're the second closest to-"

"Dream. Don't feel bad. Go ahead."

I felt bad, yes, but that's not the only reason. I was scared. I was scared to see him.

"Follow me please," the doctor said.

I walked into the room anxiously. He was lying unconscious in a hospital gown. His arms were covered in scars. I stood there in shock, just looking at him, at his arms. I wish he hadn't done this to himself, I wish I could've helped him.

"I'll leave you alone," the doctor said, stepping out of the room. He closed the door as a tear fell from my eye.

"Oh George," I whispered through a sob. "Why didn't you tell me?"

I knelt down next to the bed and held his hand.

"Why did you do this to yourself? Your perfect self, why didn't you say anything," I sobbed.

I gently touched his scars. 'Why didn't I notice?' I asked myself over and over.

I held his arm gently and kissed his scars.

"George," I sobbed. "George please wake up."

I sat there sobbing, looking at his limp body.

"George please wake up I can't stand seeing you like this any longer. Please, please wake up George I love you."

I heard the door open. The doctor had let everyone else in. Tom came running over.

"George!" He fell to his knees next to me.