New Feelings

Uncle Sam

"I don't want to die..." his childish voice shouted inside his head.

Despite this, he put up a strong front. He was smiling at his dad, mom and older brother.

"It's all my fault..."

"I should've seen it earlier..."

"Why didn't I play more with him..."

Echoes of pain from each of them. It's sad... Sad that we feel all these regrets only as a loved one faces the uncertainty of the next day. We take them for granted, passing the day as if we will have more time the next day. In all my experience it's the family who's most regretful... That they didn't pay attention... That they didn't spend more time... That they didn't do enough... That they would change things if they had another chance... But nature is cruel... Life is cruel... It gives no second chances... It just is...

I was oblivious to these feelings before. It was just a job. While I felt sadness, I never truly comprehended the level and power of these emotions. As I stood in that hospital room, looking at the people I called family, those feelings hit me with full force. They shook me to the very core, even more so when it was my duty to deliver the news to those ready to depart. I stood there motionless, thoughts fighting in my head, negative, positive, swirling in an incessant typhoon of contradictory feelings, as I couldn't conceive a way of eluding my task for once in my whole time of being.

"UNCLE SAM!" the boy shouted, kicking me out of my trance, smiling widely at me.

"Hey, buddy!" I smiled back, clenching my fists.

I took a moment to breathe in. Like it or not, there was nothing else I could do but face it. It was my job. All I can do is help the transition as much as possible. I approached Matthew, who embraced me and Adele as tightly as he could. Taking a couple of chairs from the room, we sat down next to his bed, across from James, Alex and William.

"Thank you for coming. It's nice seeing some friendly faces." Alex said, her eyes red and dry.

"No need to thank us. We're family." Adele responded. "What about you, how are you Matthew?" she carried on.

The kid took a look at us, his smiling face hiding the horror that he faced.

"I'm ok, Adele. I'm just happy to have everyone here. It's a bit scary on my own, during the nights. But I'm a big boy so I got used to it."

For only 5 years old, the kid had a lot of strength, caring more about the people around him, than himself...

But then again, children are amazing. They stumble and fall, always raising no matter the obstacle in front of them. I was shattered that this was the one obstacle he could never overcome. Even though he felt it, he still acted like nothing was wrong, just to make his family better. I had delayed enough. At that point, it was better that I got through it as fast as possible.

I looked at him, my eyes as red as everyone's in the room. I took a deep breath and touched his hand.

"Hey, Matt. You want to know something cool?"

"Sure, Sam."

"Close your eyes."

The child closed his eyes. Snapping my fingers, I changed my shape. My hair went wild, all the way to my shoulder. My skin turned to a marble white. The white of my eyes blackened, contrasting my silver iris. My clothes took shape of my long robe. My tattoos covered my hands. I hoped the child would not get scared.

"Ok buddy, open your eyes."

Opening his eyes, his mouth was agape, eyes aghast.

"Are you a superhero?"

"Something like that. Just someone with important things to do." I smiled at his quick acceptance of my change.

"Look around you, time just stopped." I pointed it out to him.

"WOW! That's so cool!" he shouted out.