The Alpha's Favour

LXIII

This time when I shot up in bed, I could feel my heart racing. It was beating so quickly I felt like it would fail at any minute.

I threw my legs out of bed and realised I was sweating like crazy.

I quickly grabbed a robe and sunk down on the carpet. When I looked at the clock it was 2.am.

I sighed.

Constant nights of insomnia and night terrors were only getting worse.

I just wanted to call home but for obvious security reasons my phone had been taken away and was being monitored by analysts in case Roman tried to call.

I scoffed. As if he would.

I made my way out of the room. Feeling closed off and alone was making me feel so much worse. But so was roaming around Tristan's home with him not here.

I made my way to the kitchen.

I hadn't been expecting to see anyone so when I saw Joshua, my first instinct was to turn around and go to my room.

I was constantly in a state of anxiety, worry, fatigue and panic. And a Joshua showdown is among the last things I needed.

He was sitting by the island nursing a beer bottle which I'm sure Anita wouldn't approve of at all.

I decided to just ignore him hoping he would extend the same curtesy.

I walked over to grab a cup so that I could get some water to drink.

"You've really got some nerve."

I fought the urge to groan out loud.

I slowly stopped my journey to the sink and turned to look at him.

"What is it now?"

Joshua stood up. He looked at me.

"You shouldn't even be staying here." He spoke.

I folded my arms.

The way I saw it, Joshua was going to keep dumping all his hate and anger on me. I had two options, let him and understand that he was just sad and beaten up about his brother or...

"Oh I'm sorry, would you prefer me in Ornyx's post? Probably seated by his right hand side like the perfect little 'devil spawn' I am? Or I don't know, maybe I should be in the Silvercrest cells, getting tortured for being born."

Joshua clenched his jaw at me. "Playing the victim won't help you."

"Then what will?" I asked in exasperation as I threw my hands in the air.

I was tired and angry and sad. All those emotions were bubbling inside me and all this that Joshua wanted to add to my plate wasn't helping at all.

He didn't say anything immediately so I took the opportunity.

Damn it, it was my turn to talk.

"What's gonna help me, Joshua? Tell me since you know so much about me and my character and my intentions."

"If your intentions were pure, Tristan wouldn't be in this mess!" He growled.

I let out a humourless laugh and shook my head.

"There it is! There it freaking is! Joshua I. Did. Not. Kidnap. Tristan. I did not make him imprint on me and I did not cause any of this to happen!" I yelled.

It's like Joshua had gotten so used to seeing me back down that he didn't know how to respond to me raising my voice.

Good. It's about time I did.