Needing her.

Chapter 6.

⚠️TW: sh⚠️

'What is going on?' My voice is shaking. 'What is that?' 
She looks at me with tears in her eyes. 'I'm sorry little dove,' she says 'I am so sorry'.

'What do you mean, mom?' I ask, now panicking.

She falls down on the ground. I kneel down on the floor and held her head. What the hell is this.

'MOM! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!' I'm now fully in panic mode. Adrenaline rushing through my body. I feel my legs shaking.

My mom's eyes roll back in her head. Only the white parts are visable. 'MOM!'

The red substance I saw was blood. Flowing from her wrists. On the floor. On my legs.

I hear my dad run up the stairs. 'WHAT IS GOING ON?' He yells.

I'm screaming and crying. 'CALL AN AMBULANCE!' I beg my father.

He is standing right there. Looking at the scene. Doing nothing. His face is a wall and no muscle is moving. 'DAD, PLEASE!' I scream.

He doesn't listen.

⚠️End of TW⚠️

I woke up screaming. Tears falling out of my eyes. I get out of bed. I can't walk properly. My breath is stuck. I can't breath. I can't breath. I'm dying.

I hit my head. Punching myself. I feel my body calming down when the pain kicks in. It's my fault she died. It's all my fault.

I run downstairs, still trying to be quiet for my father. When I am downstairs I notice I'm only wearing my underwear. You are such a dumb fuck. I grab a long coat and cover my naked body.

I walk outside. Light a cigarette. Letting the wind play with my hair. My eyes are hurting. My head is hurting. Callie, come on. Why are you like this?

When I look at the time on my phone it's 4am. I can still sleep two hours. I did.

I woke up when my alarm went off. 5:45am. I will see her today..

I get out of bed. Put on my clothes.

This is the outfit:

'Coffee?' My dad asks. 'Yes.'

Again the same conversation. Nothing about the scream I let out last night. Or about my late entrance yesterday.

I walk outside. The sun is peaking trough the clouds and the air smells like chopped grass. This smell I love. Almost as much as her parfume.

It is 6:30am when I see her car entering my driveway. I walk up to the car. Trying to be quick, because-

'CALLIE!' It's my father. Oh no. Not now.

I turn around. I see him standing in the doorway. 'Have a nice day.' He says. What the hell? Why is he talking?

I give him a little wave and walk up to her car. Seeing her looking at me with those ocean blue eyes. I am still confused about the conversation I had with my father. Why would he talk to me?

I say nothing when I sit down in her car. 'Goodmorning Callie.' Her morning voice sends shivers down my spine.

'Goodmorning.' I softly say. Fixating to put my seatbelt on. My hands are trembling and I can't put it on. Her hands touches mine when she does it for me. 'Thank you.' I mumble.

She starts to drive. 'Did you have breakfast?' She sounds excited. Why is she so talkative this early?

'No.' I mumble while looking outside. 'I thought you hadn't, so I have this.' She reaches to the backseat and throws a little package in my lap. I look at her confused. 'What is this?' I ask.

'Breakfast, dummy,' she laughs 'or are you not hungry?'

'Oh, I'm an idiot, I don't eat.' I dryly say. She looks at me weird before she burst out laughing. 'Why so grumpy! The day is young.' She says. Still trying to stop her laugh.

Ah, she loves mornings. I don't.

'Well, I hate young. I love older things.' I say that while opening the package she gave me. 'I'm more a vintage kinda girl.'

I hear her chuckle behind the steering wheel.

In the package are two sandwiches and an apple. 'Thank you.' I say while taking a bite out of the apple.

'Your welcome.' She is looking at the road. Concentrated. I like my view. Oh, to be me.

After 40 minutes we stop at a little coffeeshop. 'You want coffee?' She asks me while grabbing her wallet.

'Yes, a plain one.' I reply. 'Okay, I'll be right back.' She walks out. Crossing the street and walking inside. I follow her with my eyes and find myself looking at her behind. You can't blame me. She looks stunning again.

She comes back with two coffees. We continue our drive. Every once in a while we look at each other. Her eyes fixate back on the road after a second. When our eyes meet my stomach does a weird thing. Are this butterflies? If yes, those things got to be killed.

When we arrive at school we walk to the classroom together. 'Would you like to join me before class starts?' She hesitantly asks. 'Yes, I would like that.' I reply with a soft voice.

In the classroom we don't speak. I read my book. She does her work. It's her who breaks the silence after a while. 'Why where you in the city last night?'

I wait with replying. After a couple seconds I tell her. 'I needed to clear my head and I just followed my will. I got there and then you got there.' I give her a small smile.

She grins. 'Yes, I did.'

'I'm glad you did.' I say after a couple seconds of silence. 'Why?' She asks, now serious.

'Because I would probably still be there if you didn't find me. I was to drunk to do anything. I'm sorry if I ruined your night.'

'You didn't ruin my night.' Her voice is soft. 'I'm glad you got home safe.'

'Yes, thank you for that. And thank you for this morning.' I feel awkward telling her that. 'Your welcome, Callie.' She smiles.

It's now 8:15am. 'My class starts in 15 minutes, I have to go.' I say.

'Yes. Meet me here after school, so I can bring you to your car.' She doesn't ask, she insists.

A laugh escapes my mouth. 'Okay, see you then.'

'Have a nice day, Callie.'

'You to, professor.'

I walk out. Holding my purse close. Oh, to be me. My cheeks are still burning. She makes me nervous, in a good way..

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Hi! I know, a lot of chapters today. But I was in the flow. Hope you liked it! Tomorrow my job starts again and I will have less time. I will try to upload every two days.

If you have tips, please let me know! I love that❤️‍🩹

Thanks guys, drink water, sleep and quit smoking. 🥰