Strange [h.s.]

Thirty Four*

Harry Styles

"How much time do we have left?" Ella's soft voice hits my ears, making me turn my head to her.

She has her attention focused on her phone, and I let my eyes drift down to see her flipping through her music to find a song.

"Enough time for me to play two more games of sudoku," I tell her.

She lifts her head, giving me a sweet smile, "Are we talking about a time frame at your skill level or the skill level you think you play at?"

I drop my phone into my lap, glaring at her from the corner of my eye. "What are you trying to say?" I grit out.

"You suck at that game," She says with a laugh, pointing down at my phone in my lap.

I scoff, playfully shaking my head, "Wow. I don't think you understand how offended I am by that sentence."

Ella gives me a short laugh before shrugging her shoulders, smiling at me sweetly. I shake my head again, grab my phone, and continue my game. I stare at the screen, trying to figure out where the two goes. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Ella's hand creep toward me, her finger getting closer to the screen. I bring up my hand, slapping away hers quickly.

Ella laughs sharply, making me turn my head to her, smiling at the infectious sound. "You can't tell me I suck at this game and then do it for me," I laugh, "Let me practice in peace."

"Okay, okay, fine," she holds her hands up in surrender. Ella shifts in her seat, scooting closer to me and leaning her head over to rest on my shoulder. I turn my head, placing a kiss on the top of her head.

Ella and I got on our flight back to Seattle this morning. It was bittersweet for me to leave London.

On the one hand, I was sad to be leaving my family. I only get to see my mum and sister occasionally, and while it was nice to be with them again, our trip was shorter than I had wanted it to be. Ella and I have jobs to get back to at home, so it was the best we could work with under those schedules. Either way, it was nice to be able to see them, even if it was for a short time.

I'm glad, on the other hand, to be going back to Seattle. I have a life there that means a lot to me. I miss my second family back home. I hate to say it, but I miss Wyatt and Mia. I definitely miss Piper.

Our trip brought a lot of things to light in my mind. I realized how fortunate I am to have such a loving family that supports me in everything I do, such as moving to America. I know how hard it must've been for them to watch me leave, but they stuck by my decision.

I also realized how lucky I am to have the family I do in Seattle. The little family that we have created here makes me feel so fortunate to have such strong people in my life, and I couldn't be luckier to have people that make a somewhat foreign place to me feel like home.

I fell in love with Ella all over again on this trip too. I fell in love with how she is as a person for the second time. The way she fit so perfectly in with my family and how much they love her just as much as I do. All and everything about her, I fell in love with again.

It's a beautiful thing to fall in love for the first time. To finally realize that the person staring back at you is the one that you want to spend the rest of your life with. But to fall in love a second, third, fourth, or however many times is so different. Every thought that has been in your mind for however long grows and grows, and you realize just how important being with this person forever is.

I think I fall in love with her over again every day I wake up, and every day, I have to fight the urge to ask her to marry me.

But I think I lost the fight.