Before You (BY: Book 1)

I'd Quite For You

Lena's POV

I didn't hear from Stef today. I thought that after last night she would have call me or something, but she just didn't. Maybe she doesn't even care, or maybe she's mad, I don't know...

What I know however is that she has a night shift and I hate those even more. I was mad at her, yet I still worry, and I hate that too, because if she's mad at me, and that she doesn't call because of that, then how am I supposed to know that she's okay, especially when she works at night.

My mind can't stop inventing every scenario possible of how she could be hurt or killed and it's literally becoming an obsession.

At this point, I know that the only way I can sleep at least a little, is to call her to see if she's okay and I'm even more angry with that because she should be the one calling me since she's the one at fault.

And so, I start calling her. One, two, three times... no answer... I don't know if I'm more angry or more worried and it's driving me crazy. I'm not usually like this. I don't usually need reassurance like this, how this became my life. I can't live with such stress. I don't know if I could ever get used to it.

I kept calling again and again, it was making me nuts as I could feel my blood pressure rising and rising. It was honestly ridiculous, and I wanted to scream until the moment I just decided that I would just come by her apartment to see if she was there avoiding my calls or if I should really get worried because maybe something bad happen to her.

It was past 2 am and here I am, up to her front door knocking, not really knowing what I would do if she opened the door.

But she didn't. Apparently, she wasn't there and now, I was officially worry sick, and I start calling her even more. With no respond, I didn't know what to think, so eventually I just sit on the ground like an idiot in my pajama, not knowing what else I could do to calm my nerves.

I was honestly tired of all this. I love her. I love her so much it hurts but are we really meant to be together? We are so different, like ice and fire and I don't know if this can work. We don't agree on so many things, we don't react the same way at all in the same situations. How can we... how can we make it?

"Lena?" I heard as my eyes were almost closing, but this certainly wake me up when I saw no other than Stef coming to me with a puzzle look on her face.

"What are you doing, love? It's almost 3am. Are you okay?" She said coming to me as I was very close to just cry my eyes out once again.

"Well, glad to see you're still alive. I can go home to sleep 3 hours before going to work, now." I said sarcastically, as she widens her eyes looking very tired herself.

"What?" she said still very much confused as I couldn't believe she couldn't see the problem here.

"You didn't call Stef!" I said rising my voice as we were in the hallway.

"Lena, the neighbors!" she whispered, exasperate herself for maybe I was driving her crazy as well while she unlocked her door.

"Oh, so now you worry more about your neighbors' sleep than mine, huh?" I said completely over the edge as she just grabbed me and pulled me into her apartment.

"Lena, what is it with you? You fucking ask me to leave you alone, and now you're here screaming at me after nine hours shift, at 3 am because I did what you ask me to do, I mean... I... what the fuck?" she said in disbelieve as nothing could make me angrier than her cursing right now.

"You didn't answer your damn phone, do you know how many times I called you? Do you know how long I've been waiting here just to see if you were okay and not dead God knows where? And why didn't you answer me or send me a freaking text!" I said my face flushed.