Running

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summary: in which dan is running, which isn't a good thing for anyone.
word count: 2.4k
(hello from the future! this is may 2016 me here to tell you that this one-shot and the next few that follow it were written a pretty long time ago and currently make me want to throw up from cringe every time i so much as read a word - you've been warned ^-^)

The busy and bustling streets of London were never the best place to escape to if you wanted solitude or privacy, but Dan wasn't really thinking straight right now, excusing the irony of that phrase considering the circumstances that lead him to be running against the London crowds in the first place. He hated every bone in his body yet he still wasn't turning back. Why had he run away like that, and why was he still running?

Why, after five years of waiting, the person that he loved had finally told him he loved him back, and instead of kissing him, instead of confessing his love back Dan had ran away, not even saying a word before he got as much distance between their apartment and him as possible. The time had finally come after so long to for them to be together, and Dan had been a coward. More than that, he was a selfish jerk - how must Phil feel, abandoned after finally confessing his love for his best friend? He was a horrible person who wouldn't deserve Phil in million lifetimes. He replayed the last few hours over and over again in his head, getting on a tube, ignoring the buzzes on his phone and the weird looks from commuters as he sank into one of the (ominously damp) chairs, head in hands. How could he have been so stupid?

"Phil, where's the Mario Kart disc?" I asked, ready to totally dominate the 150cc Special Cup.

"I-I don't know, you had it l-last." Phil called from his bedroom, slightly shakier and more muffled than usual, like he was...crying. Was he okay?

"Phil? You okay?" I called back uncertainly - when I got no reply, I decided my gold medal would have to wait. Lately, Phil had been my first priority, although I guess that had been true since we moved in together and I started to noticed how beautiful he really was.

Phil, my best friend. Phil, who I was secretly in love with but so afraid of judgement or rejection I could never tell him. I could never tell anyone - what if I ruined our friendship, what if he didn't like me back - what if we broke up and ended up hating each other? These thoughts kept me awake at night. I loved him, but a secret it would stay. Nonetheless, we were still best friends despite the highly inappropriate crush I had on him, and it was my duty to make him feel better if he was down. I knocked on his door but still got no reply, only hearing soft small sobs. I quietly entered to see him huddled up in his duvet, tears running down his face.

Dan got off the tube. He still had no idea where he was going, but anywhere other than that apartment would be good (though he still didn't know why he was so scared.) He got out his phone - five missed calls, four new text messages. He wouldn't look at them now. He couldn't bare it.

He needed to get out.

"Oh, Phil" I said softly, running over and putting my arm around him, trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach at the thought of touching him and the zap of electricity when I did.

"What's wrong, Lion?" I asked, hugging him tight and trying to control my feelings - Phil came first, like always.

"I...I got an h-horrible comment from so-someone last n-night and I-I can't s-stop thinking a-aboutwh-what if they're r-right and e-everybody hates me and I'm -"

"Phil, nobody hates you, you're amazing." I interrupted, sighing -Phil could be so sensitive sometimes, and it didn't really help in my case - it just made me want to kiss him even more.

"Look how many people are fighting for you, look at all the lovely comments, okay?" I said soothingly, pointing out the fans defending Phil. Weird as they might have been, I was always proud of our subscribers for helping Phil see he wasn't hated. All I wanted to tell him was how much I didn't hate him, I did the opposite. But the words got stuck in my throat. Just like every time he was upset.

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