phan // one-shots

You Just Might See A Ghost Tonight

(title courtesy of emperor's new clothes by panic! at the disco because I'm slightly obsessed)

IF IT FEELS GOOD, TASTES GOOD - IT MUST BE MINE  *coughs* anyway

summary: spoopy fluff with angsty vampire!dan and cute ghost!phil

"I really want to kiss you right now."
"I would love to too, but unfortunately you're kind of see-through, which means trying to kiss you is like trying to kiss a cool breeze."  
word count: 1.5k

Halloween – my favourite night of the year and, coincidentally, the one night of the year where I can actually be myself.

The first things you should know about Halloween are the things you should be scared of. Werewolves, probably not – I haven't seen one in a while since we kicked their asses a couple centuries back. Witches don't tend to visit you unless you promised them your unborn child, and Vampires, well –you better start to run now.
Everything else is pretty much harmless; except if you piss off a ghost, in which case good luck finding everything you own. Ghosts know the best hiding places (sometimes unintentionally), whether they're trying to hide something or trying to find someone.
(The ghost I know found me completely by accident a while back when I didn't exactly want to be found, and let's just say I didn't appreciate it. I guess hiding vampires are no match for clumsy ghosts, but seeing as I now have a pretty-cute-even-if-he's –transparent boyfriend, I don't really mind.)
So, Halloween, where I don't have to hide and pretend I wasn't born six centuries ago and that I have to drink the blood of strangers if I want to survive. Halloween, where it's perfectly acceptable to look weirdly pale and have fangs for teeth and skulk around in the dark. Halloween – my favourite night of the year, because no-one will so much bat an eyelid if I look suspiciously like a vampire.
If you hadn't figured it out by now, you should probably start running.

***
If you asked me, I'm not really a fan of the whole murder thing, or the "drink the stranger's blood until they're dry" thing – I don't like to kill people if I can help it, because normally that just means Phil complains to me about another new ghost he's got to deal with. It's not like I want to be a killer, not anymore, but do you really think I ever wanted to be a vampire?
Yeah yeah, get your violins out now – poor teenage orphan peasant Dan from the 15th century, all alone in some dark alleyway when some thirsty asshole got a bit too excited and accidentally made him a blood sucking almost-immortal too.

I only take what I need anyway, and that's about a pint per day – for the humans it's like a messier blood drive, where you wake up in a dark alley with no memory of the last hour instead of getting cookies.
If I drank enough strangers tonight, it would keep me going until Christmas.
And that's why I was following a girl in her twenties glued to her phone screen, casually strolling down some random street I've never heard of. I was almost ready to pounce, just waiting for the right moment as we neared the corner, ready for a drink, ready for her to-
The girl screamed loudly as a massive bin came crashing down from the cul-de-sac metres from where she stood. She spun around in shock, seeing me inches from her neck and screamed again, bolting into a frantic run, leaving me behind. I cursed, frustrated, before leaning against the wall, sighing heavily. I hadn't had a drink all night, saving the couple of pints I'd collected for later.
"Not having any luck?"
I shot up, instantly smiling at the voice even if I couldn't see anywhere it might have come from – it was kind of like a reflex, I guessed.
"I know you're here Phil, you little-"
I felt a hand tap my on the shoulder and I spun around, hearing him giggle at me. I swear to God, if he had a neck I could actually bite I would bite him literally just so he would shut up.
Suddenly I was looking into the brightest eyes I'd ever seen – like someone had stolen the moon and painted it blue, and then we were both smiling.
"Hey, you."
"Hi, Captain Van-Vampireface – how's your Halloween going."
This was either where I'd slap him or kiss him, if I could do either. It was hard, when you literally couldn't touch the person you loved – but our love was never exactly going to be easy, was it? Of all the millions of supernatural creatures out there, I had to go and fall in love with the one who was transparent. It wasn't my fault I apparently had a thing for cute see-through idiots.
I mean, with my fangs it's not as if we could do much kissing anyway, but it would be nice to have the option.

"Not great, actually– I've only managed to get about a week's supply. You?"
"Well I was going to haunt that girl for saying ghosts didn't exist, but you scared her off."
"I scared her off? I wasn't the one who knocked that bloody bin over."
"What am I meant to do, possess her or something? That won't scare her if I make do the robot and she can't even remember it after."
"Well done Phil, way to make possessing actually sound lame." I said sarcastically, and the brightness flickered a little out of his eyes.
"You could always throw her out of a ground floor window or something." I said.
"I don't want to hurt anyone."
I raised an eyebrow, smile fading now.

"You think I do?" I muttered quietly, looking at the floor and hearing Phil sigh a little in exasperation.
"Dan, of course that's not what I meant – I always mess words up, I-"
"Yeah, that's about the only thing you're actually good at." I said, with a way more venom than I probably should have, regretting it as soon as I said it but it was too late.
I sighed and turned to face the wall, running my hand through my hair. I probably looked like a major asshole right now, but I hadn't had a drink in three days and I was so thirsty, and that's when I was a bit more douche vampire than Dan - the guy who can be alright sometimes but has to drink blood to stay alive. I turned back to face Phil, but he'd gone.
Sometimes I didn't know why he stuck around.

"Phil? Phil!" Kicking the bin in frustration, I sank to the floor. Whenever I messed up things with Phil (which was roughly every couple days – seconds in our lifetime, but still) I was well and truly alone, and that reminded me of time I'd much rather forget, before that cute clumsy ghost ever found me trying to hide, told me I could stop being a danger to everyone around me, convinced me I didn't deserve to die and gave me a reason to live. I owed him everything and I just kept screwing things up by saying things I didn't really mean.
I took a deep breath.

"Phil, look – I'm sorry, that was horrible of me – you know I'm an asshole, and honestly, I have never and won't ever deserve you. You're amazing at everything – from the ghost stuff like haunting and possessing and knocking over bins - to the not-so-ghost stuff, like putting up with me for nearly two-hundred years, and being kind and sweet and so, so beautiful. You're the most beautiful, smartest, funniest supernatural being I've ever met. God, Phil, I can't even touch you, and it nearly kills me, because sometimes it's all I want to do. I love you, so much."
I stopped and sighed again, waiting for a reply but there was nothing – he must have really gone this time. I began to walk away when I felt a tap on my shoulder and heard a giggle.
My face broke into the biggest smile as I turned around and saw him staring at me shyly.

"You're an asshole."
"I know."
"A stupid angsty vampire asshole."
"I know."
"I really don't know why I put up with you."
"Neither do I."
"I really want to kiss you right now."
"I would love to, but unfortunately you're kind of see-through, which means trying to kiss you is like trying to kiss a cool breeze."

We were both smiling again now, and instead of kissing I settled for a shy salute, which Phil gladly returned along with an almost blinding grin. 

"Come on – you may be a stupid angsty vampire asshole, but you're my stupid angsty vampire asshole."
"That the most romantic thing anyone's ever-
"Shut up." 

"Sorry. Where are we going?" I asked and Phil gestured dramatically out into the air.

"The night is young! You know what they say, people to haunt, blood to drink – we could work as a team, you know." We started to walk out of the alley down back along the street, looking for our next victim. Maybe I would get a drink tonight after all.

Maybe the reason Phil hadn't left me yet is that whatever we had, whenever we fought (or alternatively, whenever I was an ass) we couldn't just kiss and make up – whenever I screwed things up again, I couldn't just screw him until everything was fine again. But I could tell him how much he meant to me, and that was always enough.
"That sounds perfect." 

"Hey, Dan?"
"Yeah?"

"I love you."
"...I know."
"..."
"Ow, what did you do that for?"
"..."
"Okay, okay – I love you too." 

happy halloween everybody! hope your day is super spoopy ^-^