Forsake My Broken Hart

Chapter 6

Azrael pinned me to a tree as the rain turned into a downpour. I melted into his hard body as his lips captured mine. Someone's hand was inching along my leg, growing closer to the space between my thighs.

I was transported back into a memory. It wasn't one of the guys' hands on me, it was Peter with his tongue licking up the blood on my inner thigh. I kicked out, swinging my arms, surprised at the lack of restraint around them.

My ass hit the wet ground, rain dripping down my face to the muddy earth below me. Chogan and Ryder were kneeling beside me while Azrael and Rowan had backed off. My heart stung when reality slapped me in the face. This was the second time I had tried to be intimate and memories of Peter had surfaced. Both times had been with Azrael. Pain and hurt morphed his face into a frown, but he wiped his emotions away when he noticed me watching him.

Crickets and frogs played a symphony to match the sound of the falling rain, all the while my heart was cracking in two. "I'm sorry." My voice a hoarse whisper. "I'm so fucking sorry."

There was no stopping the tears as I sobbed and wrapped my arms around myself, trying to find comfort in my own body, but my body didn't belong to me. It belonged to my nightmares.

I flinched as a hand reached for me, only for it to immediately withdraw at my involuntary jerk. The four sat and stood by as I tucked my head between my knees and cried. There was nothing they could do, and they knew it. It showed in their body language. The tight fists. The clenched jaws. The furrowed brows.

I could sense slight movements, but each time it never went further than a twitch in my direction. Fuck Peter. Fuck Carroway. Fuck this shitty world, and this shitty life. I sniffed one last time before roughly scrubbing the tears away from my face.

The rain was pelting towards the ground so forcefully it was coming in sideways. The sting of it hitting my face was a reminder that I was still here. I was still alive. I was with my men. That was something Peter would never be able to steal from me, and I was damned if I would allow him to damage my sex life.

I stood up, Ryder and Chogan scrambling to their feet as well, and tilted my head to the sky. The sun broke through the stormy clouds for a single moment, and in that second, time seemed to stand still as I basked in its warmth. I still had so much to live for, so I would not allow the trauma to define who I was.

"I'm okay now. Let's go catch up to the others." I slipped my hand into Chogan's, letting them all know I was okay to be touched. Ryder brushed his fingers down the side of my cheek before leading the way. Rowan's hand came to rest in the middle of my back, and Azrael held back a bit to bring up the rear.

Mud squelched between my toes. I grimaced at the sensation of wet mushy goo sticking to my feet. Although the guys had stripped to their underwear, they had kept their shoes on. I hadn't been wearing any, trying to save the integrity of the borrowed tennis shoes that were too small for my feet.

"We should all get new boots and the next town." Ryder suggested. Rowan glanced down at my bare feet and shook his head in exasperation.

"It will be needed for the mountains anyway. We don't know what we will come across while there." Chogan tossed in.

"Any place will probably be riddled with either biters or humans. Or it will have already been picked clean by survivors, but we don't really have a choice, do we?" Rowan tussled his wet hair with a hand.

"We just took out about fifty biters easy." Ryder boasted. "We can handle it."

"We got lucky, kid." Azrael snapped. "Mostly thanks to Kaito's speed and Rowan's precognition."

"Wouldn't those work in our favor wherever we go?" Ryder threw back. "Besides, it's the perfect practice for our skills. We also need to work on that connection thing."