The Girl Who Cried Rape

Chapter 11: New Year, New Start

Chapter 11: New Year, New Start

2:05pm - New Years Eve

It had been a week since I left my room last. My mother would bring me food and leave it outside the door but I was too upset to eat. My stomach would curl and cringe with the thought of what I had done and even worse when I remembered that I enjoyed myself when I thought it was Matt. I love Matt. How am I ever going to be able to tell him or anyone what I did? I can't leave this room. Outside of these four walls are confused people with questions, people who want answers to those questions...answers I can't give. I could lie but I don't need to make my web any bigger. Anyway, I don't even know what lie I could tell for this. So I must stay in here, in these four walls, surrounded by the crime scene of where I was raped more than once. I'm surrounded by my guilt and shame. I blame myself, if I had only pulled off his fake beard I would of...I could of...the truth is I don't know what I would of done. I could of screamed pushed him away and ran for my bedroom door and two my parents. But he could have stopped me too. What would I have even said to my parents anyway? I wasn't exactly decent; you could tell what I was getting ready to do. I couldn't tell them about Matt and me... They wouldn't understand, they'd freak out just like they had before when they thought Matt and I were together. I just wish I could say "Dad, Mom...I"

A knock came from the door. Speak of the devil, do they read minds?

"Honey, are you ever coming out of there?" My mom asked concerned.

I didn't answer. I didn't really know. I suppose I would have to at some point, can't not eat forever. Then I heard her walk downstairs, which I thought was weird because she doesn't normally give up that fast. So what was I saying before? Oh right, "Mom, Dad...I'm dating Matt, I love him and he loves me...so deal with it," I whispered to myself as if preparing to tell them. What does it matter anyway? I'm never going to tell them. I guess they'll find out when they receive my wedding invitation and see the name of the man I'm marrying. If that's even Matt but a girl can hope, right?

The next thing I hear is the sound of my door being busted open by my father.

"That's it! It's time to get up and leave your room. You need to eat and do something instead of locking yourself in here," my father said sternly.

"Now, Simon, stop it," my mother said to my father and then turned to me, "honey, he isn't wrong you do need to get out of bed and eat something. It's been a week since you even touched your food."

"Okay, but why did you have to break down my door?" I asked jokingly.

"Well when you didn't answer I got worried so I went to get your father. I didn't know he'd break the door but he couldn't find the key to unlock your room," my mother answered.

"That's because I have it. I didn't want anyone to barge in here but I guess I was wrong," I said sarcastically.

"Okay, we're going to need that back. Also Detective Carson called she wants you to come to the police station tomorrow to talk." My father said then turned to leave the room.

"Why do I need to go to the police station? Did they find anything, did they find the man who did those things to me?!" I asked frantically, grabbing mom's arm.

"I don't know, dear. I'm sure everything's okay. The police are doing everything they can. Now, we'll deal with all that tomorrow, its time to set up for the New Year's celebration tonight." My mom said with a smile.

"We're having a party? ... I... I don't want to go." I said turning away from her.

"Well why not? You can invite Matt," my mother said grinning as if she knew more than she does.