The Myth Of Hope

little date?

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"Have some self respect Stella" my bestfriend Ella said after I rant about Nate's last nights rude behavior to her.

'He's not like that it's just he is a little shy and don't like PDA other than that he's such a sweetheart'. I defended

"Thats not being shy that's a straight red flag I don't think I like his behavior much" Ella commented through my phone.

'You are saying that because you haven't met him once you will you will realize how sweet he is' I dreaminly said

"Yeah yeah whatever, shit listen I got to go we'll talk in evening my sister's calling me, I think she knows I broke her favorite cup." She worriedly said

I just chuckled and hung up knowing it's third time this month she have broken a cup and its just the starting of the month..

This whole lockdown thing is pretty exhausting. I'd be dead if I didn't had Netflix, which made me realize to complete the series I was currently watching which was named CHILLING ADVENTURES OF SABRINA.

It was evening and eventually my time to go meet my boyfriend. Or um my so called enemy he never labeled us. I need to talk to him about this.

'NATEE...
'NATEEEEEEE' As usual I was destroying my vocal cords infront of his house. Oh finally he came out of his house with his hairs all messy and shirt all wrinkled, bet was fighting with his little sister. He rose one of his eyebrows silently asking me why was i standing in front of his house once again. He's such a bitch thats how you treat the girl you love ? Typical boys..

'Hey do you wanna maybe go for a ride?' I poliety asked
He kinda checked me out and just nodded his head as usual and went inside he come back 17 mins later not that i was counting......
Of course i was counting but anyways.

He took his bike out, sat on it and started riding without even making whether I was following him or not. But again I think I'll follow him everywhere. So I started cycling and we both ride parallel silently for few minutes.

'How are you so skinny' I blurted out. Fuck.
He shook his head and said "I had an operation when I was a kid and that slowed my growth of muscles, and I exercise everyday".

I rememberd when he had that operation we used to be best buddies. I rememberd when he invited me to his house to show the decorations of his welcome after his recovery. I rememberd me tugging his t-shirt, him holding his hand. I rememberd it all too well.

I rememberd us all too well.......

He is soo fucking skinny and well I'm no where near close, it kinda make me suddenly conscious.

'I am also gonna start working out to loose some weight' I shakily said

"Oh no no you don't have too you are perfect, soo perfect just the way you are you don't need loosing of weight." He confidently said

Oh my fucking God he sure do have way with his words. Because nothing and no one have given me butterflies like he do.

'Ahm for real?' I asked .

"Yeah there's absolutely no need bit if you want you can do it for your mental peace or self satisfaction you can try its fun" he softly spoke.

I couldn't keep the butterflies in my stomach locked anymore, as I was listening to his words I was feeling this wierd, warm sensations in my whole body.

Oh fuck. I am totally wipped for this boy.

I just hmmed because I couldn't say anything didn't wanted to the silence between us was comforting.

We cycled for half an hour then he saw his dad's car coming and muttered a curse and said " we need to take alex with us from now on its dangerous. "

Idk if I was being paranoid or what but I felt a pang of hurt in my chest after I realized that he might mean that he don't wanna be alone with me cause he feels ashamed?

Ashamed of being with me?
Is it the reason why he is not giving us a labell?

We decided to call Alex he gladly agreed and all three of us was cycling and as usual I was trying to poke my nose in their conversation and trying to make myself feel included.

'I'm hungry asf do you guys wanna go get fries?' I asked them feeling done with their annoying conversation.

"Umm yeah ok  but you are paying" Alex said and then shrugged

'I'm the one who always pay ' i whined

"Fine if u don't pay we won't come with you" Alex said with a smirk all  while Nate was silent.

'Fuck fine I'll pay' I said making Alex laugh like an idiot.

So I was paying the cashier for 2 fries and 3 milkshakes. Nate was holding his milkshake, my and Alex's fries cause he decided to share (cause he thinks junk food is highly unhingin and unhealthy) .

We all went and sit Nate was still holding the food cause apparently he thinks that the table is too dirty to be good. He was still wearing his mask

"Why arent you guys eating" Alex asked

Cause I'm clearly wearing a mask and my hands are occupied and no way in hell I'll put this food on this table.

"Stelllaaa why dont you remove his mask" Alex said smirkingly

'Yeah sure' I said and move my hand to remove his mask, we were both staring in each others eyes. The moment my my hand touched his face I feel an electric rush all over my body. We were too lost in each other's eyes so we couldn't notice when Alex's hand reached behind nates head and smacked it. I quickly removed the mask and started avoiding eye contact with both of them.

Fuck him for making me feel this way.

I wanna be yours....
By arctic monkey was currently blasting in the car and now a days this song, scratch that every romantic song only reminds me of one person My Nate.

How am I going to survive without talking to him when it was the only thing I used to look forward to....

I was on my way to my grandmother's house with my mum, my lil brother and my maternal uncle. It's only been 24 hours and I was awfully missing him. God knows how I'll spend 10 days without him.

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