Fix you

Movies and nightmares

Josh pov

I was about to kiss porcelain when a bike went past us and broke me out of my daze. I'm no good for her. She shouldn't be with a drug addict, not that she knows what I am. I shouldn't even be friends with her but I feel like I need to have her in my life.

I walked beside her as we headed for her house. I stuck my hands in my jeans pockets and started humming time of my life by green day.

Porcelain smiled and sung along, "another turning point and fork stuck in the road."

I smiled, "you can sing."

She smirked, "everyone can sing. Some can just sing well."

I rolled my eyes, "can't you just take a compliment?" I asked

She laughed, "I could. But where's the fun in that?"

I laughed and kept walking until we hit her house. She walked up and put in the code so the door would unlock. We went inside and into the kitchen.

She went to the fridge and passed me a coke, "my dads not home till the day after tomorrow, so we're all alone." I nodded, all alone with porcelain, if only she weren't too good for me. She could do so much better. "Wanna go hang in my room and watch old movies? I have the thin man box set."

I looked up at her, "the what?" I asked.

She laughed as she grabbed chips from the cupboard, "the thin man, it's a series of old detective movies."

I nodded and followed her to her room, "why are we watching them in your room?"

She shrugged, "theres a good tv and a couch and since its in the basement we don't have a rec-room since that's where my bedroom is. The only other tvs in the house are in the kitchen and my" she paused, "dads room."

Her voice cracked when she said 'dad'. We went to the basement and into her room. I sat on the arm of the couch while she put the movie in. I noticed her wipe a tear away quickly before she turned around again, i stood up and went over to her when she turned around, "come here, porce." I said as I wrapped my arms around her and she hid her head in my neck.

She sobbed quietly into my shirt as we stood there for about 5 minutes, I continuously drew on her back as she did. I could hear her breath catch in her throat, like she was only breathing in. I could feel a puddle forming in my shirt but I ignored it.

She pulled her head away and wiped her eyes, "sorry."

I pulled her back, "why are you sorry? You're allowed to cry." I said as I wiped away a stray tear.

She smiled lightly, "I'm just used to not crying in front of people. my parents rarely see me cry, unless I just break down."

I smiled, "you don't have to hide your tears from me."

She smiled and kissed my cheek, "thanks Josh, now let's watch the movie."

She sat down on her bed, that has two of those chair pillows at the head of it, and then patted the spot next to her.

I got in while she pressed play. After watching three of the thin man movies and porcelain force feeding me, it was about 11 pm. "I should head home, doll face."

She glared at me, "I told you to not call me that." I laughed, these movies made me think of doll face as a nickname for her, porcelain doll.

I smiled and leaned over to her side of the bed, "and I told you that I don't care."

She rolled her eyes, "you can stay here tonight, if you want. It's kinda late to be walking thru the woods, all the druggies and coyotes come out after dark."

Little did she know I was one of those druggies, and was planning to see if my dealer was in the woods. But I wasn't insulted by the term, that's what I am.

She pouted at me, "please stay? The house is so big and empty. I get lonely." She made her bottom lip quiver for effect.

I rolled my eyes, "fine. But don't think you'll be able to seduce me, I'm not that kind of boy." I joked as I complied and got into the bed beside her, suddenly happy I chose to wear sweatpants this morning.

"I'm just gonna run and use your phone to tell my mom I'm staying here" she nodded and started cleaning off the bed. I ran to the kitchen and called my house phone, voicemail, "hey mom, thought I'd let you know I'm staying at porcelains tonight. I should be home in the morning, maybe with her, goodnight!"

I went back downstairs to find porcelain on her side of the bed already lying down on her side.

I moved my arm pillow off the bed and got in as porce turned off the light. She faced the opposite way from me as I lay on my back. "Night Josh." She said as she yawned.

I smiled to myself, "night doll face." I was suddenly kicked in the leg, "ow!" I yelled. I could hear her laugh to herself.

••• 3 am •••

I woke up on the floor. I heard thrashing on the bed. Did porce really just kick me out of bed, I looked at the clock, at freaking 3am?! I sat up and she was still kicking but her eyes were closed, oh, bad dream.

I got up and walked over to her side of the bed, and lightly grabbed her shoulders, her eyes shot open and she whipped her head around, "porce, porce its me." She turned to me as I sat in the edge of the bed and she wrapped her arms around me. "It's ok, it was just a bad dream."

She shook her head as she cried onto my chest, "no, it wasn't. It was a memory, it was my mom, when she passed away. It was her saying goodbye but then she was swallowed up by a big black hole and I was held back. Josh her funeral is on Sunday I don't think I can deal with it."

I just sat there holding her as she told me, "it will be ok, I'll be there with you, I'll hold your hand the whole time, ok?" She nodded, "then we can come back here and watch the rest of the thin man movies, doll face."

She laughed and hit my chest lightly, "ok." I could feel her smile on my chest.

I tightened my grip on her before letting go completely and going back to my side of the bed, "now try to get some sleep, it's only three am."

She turned around to face me, "I had the same nightmare last night, I won't be going back to sleep."

I turned my head to look at her, "did you have it the first night, when I was here?" She shook her head. I moved closer to her and wrapped my arm around her as she put her head on my chest, "this was the only difference then. try to go back to sleep." She nodded and snuggled closer to my side.

I won't let anything hurt her again, but I'm the one wrecking her, how could I help her?