Chasing You

chapter 9: Thinking

Beam slammed the door, he had a glimpse of Forths family standing at the edge of the stairs when he closed his bedroom door. He feels embarrassed for what he did but he is so angry at the moment. 

He lies down on his bed and buries his face on the pillow. He cried. "Why only now Forth, why?" He keeps on murmuring those words while crying when his mom enters his room.

"Beam, baby." called Bern. When she entered the room, she found his son crying helplessly and rolled like a ball on his bed. She immediately approached her son and hugged him. "Sshh..it's ok baby… it's ok." Said Bern

"Mom..it hurts so much…why only now he said those words I've been longing to hear since forever." He said. "I choose to leave just to forget him, but why am I getting hurt now? I thought I already moved on, I thought that his presence has no longer affected me, but why mom, why do I feel this way? Why mom?" He continued.

"Ssshhh…calm down baby, probably because 2 years is not enough to forget him and move on baby." Said Bern. "You loved him all your life baby, you created a deep connection to him, you created a deep foundation on the feelings you have for him that's why it's not that easy for you to get over it. Your mind tells you that you already forget everything about him but not your heart baby. It's not that easy to forget someone that became half of your life." Bern explained. She cupped his face while wiping his son's tears.

"Beam listen, you may admit it or not but Forth occupies half of your heart baby or even half of your life, that's why it is ok for you to feel this way, don't ever deny what you feel, because as of this moment, being true to your own feelings will soon help you to really moved on from him, if it is what you really wanted. And whatever decision you will make, always remember that we're here for you baby, just don't leave us again,.hmmm?"

"Mom.. I am sorry mom." He said while crying. "I won't leave you again, I am sorry." 

"Sshhh..it's ok baby. Mama loves you so much baby, always remember that." She said and Beam continued to cry in her embrace. After an hour of crying, Beam fell asleep. Bern tucked him in, in his duvet and quietly left the room.

Thea and Thype with their dad are waiting in the living room, Tharn is still there while his parents with Forth went back home.

"How is he mom?" Asked Thea when her mom went downstairs and sat besides her husband.

"He fell asleep crying." Said Bern

"Let him rest, he needed that." Said Ben

"I am sorry uncle,this is all because of my stupid brother." Said Tharn, he sits besides Thype.

"No Tharn, there's no one to blame here. Forth and Beam will surely make a way to solve their issues, they are still young after all. We will just support them and give them proper advice. And no matter what will be the outcome, nothing will change between our families." Said Ben assuringly and Tharn just nods and smiles dearly to Vongphipans family.

At Jaturapoom mansion: They all sat in the living room, Maila was hugging his son. David sits at the couch facing Forth. "Son, stop crying nah…just give him time." He said pertaining to Beam. "It's not that easy for him to forgive you, I know you know the reason right? So be patient, time  will come and he will talk to you." He continues. 

"Just don't give up on him, He's just hurt for what happened and if ever he decided to stay away from you, respect that honey. Your dad is right, time will come, time can heal everything." Maila said and Forth just kept crying while his mother hugged him tightly. 

It's late in the evening, Forth and Beam are still awake. Both lying on their bed, thinking about what happened earlier. They are both crying silently. Forth really regretted everything he did to Beam, he blamed himself for everything. On the other hand, Beam still loves Forth. Her mom was right, he needed to be true to himself, about what he feels about Forth, his heart tells him to forgive Forth but his mind says no.

Both we're hurt about the circumstances that they are in, the one who blamed himself and the one who dwells on the past. Their parents are correct, time is the only one which can heal everything. Both are deep in thoughts, while crying silently until they succumb to the power of sleep and darkness.

On the next day. Beam woke up early because of the ring of his cellphone. He reached the gadget placed on the side table, he looked at the caller id which is not familiar to him. He answered it anyway.

"Hellow." He said

"joh-eun achim chingu." (Good morning best friend)." Said the caller on the other line happily.  For a few seconds, Beam didn't recognize the voice but he understood what it said until he came to his senses.

"New, is that you?" He asked unsure

"geulae naya." (Yes it's me) said New. "Aw. You already forgot me." Said New 

"Oh my god, of course not. It's too early here and you wake me up, duh." Said Beam "And your voice is like a bird chirping early in the morning."

"Hahaha. I miss you too bestie." Said New "He is so used to how Beam reacts when he wakes up on the wrong side of the bed.

"I miss you more. I wish you're here." Said Beam, New can sense that Beam is sad.

"What happened? Is it him?" Asked New

"Yes." Said Beam and he tells everything to New about what happened last night.

"Don't get lonely nah..nah.." said New "I have something to tell you."

"What?"

"I talked to mom and dad if I can go back there and continue my study there and guess what?"

"What?wait.. don't tell me they agreed.?"

"Aha.."

"Really?"

"Yes, yes, yes." 

"Oh my god. I am so happy."

"Me too."

"So when will you arrive?"

"Tomorrow Beamie, I will be there tomorrow."

"What time?"

"I will arrive at 10 in the morning. So you better pick me up."

"Of course, I'll be there. Your  arrival is on time because mom and dad will have a dinner party tomorrow here in our house, a dinner party as a thank you because of his recovery."

"Wow, great. I'm happy that uncle is safe now." 

"Yup."

"So see you tomorrow Beamie, I will finish packing my things then I will buy a presence for auntie and uncle tomorrow, I will contact you tomorrow ok?"

"Ok Newie, see you tomorrow, take care."

"I will.. miss you."

"Miss you more." Said Beam and he cut the call, finally the only person he has for the period of two years and knows everything about Forth will finally come and support him.

Beam happily tells his parents about News' arrival and they allow New to stay at their house, for them New is like their own son. Because of him, Beam has company and an instant best friend.

New arrived and Beam together with his sister Thea fetched him at the airport.

When they arrived at the Vongphipan mansion, all of the staff were busy preparing for the dinner party later that night. New feels at home, all the Vongphipan's welcomed him and treated him like family.