Luring the Dragon • Aemond Targaryen

Gods, bless the bastards!

"The art of our necessities is strange. That can make vile things precious."

I was sure my position was quite delicate, and I tried so hard to avoid any trouble, at least for a while. To my surprise, Aemond has been absent for the past few days. I did not even encounter him at the dinner table, I didn't spot him in the training area, and he was nowhere in the castle. And even though this situation should have given me the proper opportunity to clear my thoughts, it was quite the opposite. Atrocious anxiety started to dominate me. And during his absence, my mind started to invent the worst scenarios. What if he notified in the meantime the Queen Alicent about our previous trivial incident from his chambers? What if he intends to show everybody the precious dagger he took away from me, and then he will spread his vile theories about Daemon and me? He has power over me, and he can ruin my reputation, and nobody will give me a chance to explain my version of the story. I hate men, and I hate Aemond even more.

'Don't you like the food, dear?' Queen Alicent asked me, trying to fake genuine concern, although there was no doubt that she didn't care about my appetite any more than she cared about how the leaves were decomposing on the grass in the royal garden. I knew that all this politeness was part of the protocol because she was our host, but somehow I hoped she would give up these cordialities after the first week. Somehow it was harder for me to despise her when she spoke to me so nicely. I reminded myself that she was pretending to be someone else. She was not this kind of woman; she was a sly vixen. 

'I beg your pardon, your majesty. I didn't mean to offend you. The food is excellent. Perhaps I ate more than usual at lunch, and now I'm not exactly hungry.' In reality, I managed to bypass serving lunch or even breakfast. I could barely touch food in the last few days. Every time I ate something, I suddenly felt nauseous, and several times I ended up vomiting. The effects of my misery were affecting my body.

'Of course, I'll tell the maids to bring fresh fruits and tea to your room in case you get hungry later.' she smiled, and I could only bow my head in gratitude for her generous gesture. I felt Jace next to me tense up, but he didn't say a word the whole evening. Something was wrong with him, and I channeled my last energy resources to talk to him right after dinner.

The rest of the evening was alarmingly quiet. There have been no more events with bad jokes or allusions regarding our paternity. Aegon was drunker than all of us, and it seemed that only in those moments he noticed his wife, Helaena. While my mother tried to chitchat with Alicent without much enthusiasm, Daemon only listened and sporadically exchanged a few words with the king, who was very excited about some memories from his distant youth.

Jace left right after we served the dessert. He left before eating at least half of the pie. Under other circumstances, he would most likely have eaten my portion too. I withdrew as politely as possible, thanking them for the hospitality, then I ran down the hall, trying to catch up with my younger brother. Even though Jace and I never had the same bond that I had with Luke, that doesn't mean I care less about him. I called him several times, and although I was confident he heard me, he refused to stop. I quickened my steps and grabbed him a little more aggressively than I intended by his shirt sleeve.

'What's wrong with you?' I asked him, and I felt him shudder next to me. I didn't know if he was angry or sad. But he certainly faces a lot of negative emotions.

'Tomorrow I will leave for Winterfell.' was all he said, and at that moment, I felt how all the anger and fear accumulated in the last weeks would knock me down. I didn't want to hear such nonsense. Winterfell was so far that even with a dragon, it would still take several days to get there. Also, how could he leave just now?