A Penny for My Thoughts

13

April 13, 2023

I had promised to tell yall about Gus and me. Honestly not much happened when our friendship ended. I want to say things were shaky but what messed it up more was when he decided to post on Snapchat that I was out here going to concerts without him. Okay, let me start from the beginning. Remember when I said that he would call me names that started to make me uncomfortable, well since then our friendship became shaky. Not only that but him being jealous that I would hang out more with my other friend than him. I mean I would make an effort to want to hang out but he somehow would make excuses but once he saw I was drifting away he decided to complain. Plus, around that time I started getting into cars. I won't say I'm a car girl or anything like that because I know I have a very long way to learn about cars. Gus, on the other hand, wasn't interested and when I would somehow talk about it, he would just have an unamused face. There was a time when I told him I wanted to get my dream car, which is a Dodge Charger. He would tell me why I'm going to get a car like that when I should get a regular car. When I found my car, I showed him a picture and the face and comment he said about my car just wasn't it. I don't know if it was because he knew I would get closer to them people or what but he didn't like the idea of me getting it. I still did it and I'm the happiest person ever with my car. Once I got my car and we hung out for the first time in my car he was like "It's really nice and you should let me drive it." Like why should I let you drive my car when you said I shouldn't get it when I showed you a picture of it? When you judged the color of my car even tho I said I loved the color? Just doesn't make sense. The little comments he would say under his breath just irked me but I let it go because we are friends. Just the little things he would say after that was what made me want to stop talking to him. How I started to force myself to hang out with him when I didn't want to because I didn't want to end our friendship of years. Let's not forget how I was slowly fading away from K-pop and growing more into Latin music. Things we used to have in common were changing or I simply wasn't interested in anymore. The last straw that ended everything was when he knew about 6 months prior that I was going to see Bad Bunny in August with Mari and Mayra. That day he decided to post on Snapchat saying how I went to a concert without him and that he was home drinking because of it. I don't know, I don't really remember what he said but it was along those lines. Then during the concert, he posted more on his story saying how bad of a friend I am because I saw his story and did check up on him if he was alright. I understand I was in the wrong there but mijo I briefly saw your story and was gonna text you after but you decided to make a big deal out of it. Not only that we had work the next day and I was the driver and had to get us home. Anyways that happened and I just didn't say anything. A couple of days later I got a notification from Snap saying Gus added you on Snapchat. Like he really unfriended me just to add me again. I accepted and left it like that. That's when he texted me calling me a bitch because I never texted back and I told him why should I text him when he unadded me out of nowhere. His excuse was that I hurt him and that I didn't care enough about him. After that, I just never answered him or texted him back.

Now he's been trying to talk to me but every time I answer him back he either leaves me on delivery for a couple of days and says "hey" again or he would answer and ask for a day to meet up. He asked me if there was a way to fix our friendship he wants to try but every time he texts me, I'm always left on delivered. Yeah, no I'm not doing that shit. I want to say about a week ago he texted me asking me if I was working and I just didn't answer. I'm not gonna waste my time replying just so he can leave me on delivery. 

Anyways, I did Door Dash on Tuesday. It was meh, 6 deliveries, and made about $32. Not bad but I would have to be doing Door Dash the whole day to make some decent money.  Tho that's gas money I really don't have plus the mileage I'm putting on my car. 

Right now it is 2:44 AM, and I'm writing this because I don't really have anything better to do. Don't know why but at night I get anxious and I either have to be watching a movie/drama or doing something. Am I sleepy? Ehh so-so, but if I go to bed then I will be restless and I won't be able to sleep. What I'm trying to do is get myself tired that once I lay down I knock out. Also, I plan to go get coffee later with Daisy. There's this lady who owns a small coffee trailer, her coffees are to die for. They might be more on the pricey side but they are totally worth it. I found 2 coffee places I will go to instead of Dunkin. Family Grounds and The Cottage.

I also work today.......................and honestly, I don't want to go in at all. Maybe I should call off and just go visit Violeta with Daisy. I don't know maybe I'll just show up at work. Anyways, I'm getting sleepy now and I will have to wake up in a couple of hours too. So goodnight and hopefully I'll update soon. I'll try to make it a habit.