Reylo: These Violent Delights

Chapter 28: Pinky Promise?

As the loud smack of Rey's slap across Kylo's face lingered in the air and rang in her ears, fear began to creep in.

When she had first done it, she didn't care what the consequences were. She just needed him to stop reminding her of what she already knew. But in the uncomfortable silence expanding between them, the severity of what she had done hit her in the face. She had just slapped the Supreme Leader of the galaxy. With a trembling bottom lip, she placed her stinging hand back in her lap and waited for his reaction.

Kylo pulled back from her and brought his hand to his face, slowly tracing the spot where her palm had connected with his cheek. She went rigid, anticipating his retaliation, but after what felt like an eternity, he got on his feet and stood above her. "You're angry because you know I'm right," came his low, rough voice, his presence hovering above her head as she kept hers hanging low. "He doesn't care about you. Nobody in the Resistance does. It's time to move on and let them go."

Rey swung her head from side to side, her bleary eyes locked on his boots. "It's not that easy."

"Yes, it is," he retorted, taking a powerful step closer to her. "All you have to do is—"

"Just stop!" she shouted, her voice breaking as she craned her neck to look at him. "It's not easy when I don't have anywhere else to go, Kylo!"

Intensity flashed in his eyes, nostrils flaring and jaw tight. "You don't need to go anywhere. You can stay here with me."

She extended her spine, glaring up at him. "I told you I won't stay here as your slave."

"And I already told you that's not what you would be!"

"Slave, prisoner—same thing!" Rey shot back, throwing her hands up in exhaustion. "It doesn't matter what you call it. The outcome is the same. I have no control over my own life here. I know the Resistance isn't perfect, but at least with them, I wouldn't have to live in a cage and pretend to be happy about it!"

Rage infiltrated his face, immediately replaced by the same look his mother had on the ramp before she left Rey—cold indifference. "Soon enough, there won't even be a Resistance for you to go back to," he said, voice low and tight and dangerous. She froze, waiting for him to elaborate, but all he did was flick his eyes up and down her body before turning around and storming away from her.

She threw the blanket aside and ran after him, a semblance of sobriety finally settling into her bloodstream. "What do you mean?"

"We found their new base." Kylo didn't look at her as he pounded through the living area to the balcony. "And Starkiller's next target."

Panic inundated her senses. "No, no, Kylo, wait—"

"Yes," he roared, whipping around to face her. She stumbled to a stop, taking unsteady steps backward as he closed in. "All those TIE fighters in the sky, and you think we just let them escape?" He gave an aggressive shake of his head, laughing mirthlessly as he backed her up against the sofa. "Don't be naive, Kitten. We tracked them through lightspeed. And when the time is right, we will destroy the Resistance once and for all, and you will have to accept that your home is here, with me."

Rey had to pick her jaw up off the floor. "You're going to kill all my friends, and yet, you expect me to stay with you?" With a glower, Kylo turned around and continued out to the balcony, eliciting the incredulous, high-pitched noises that escaped her lips as she followed after him. "Do you hear how absolutely fucking deranged that is, Supreme Leader?"

Kylo spoke resolutely as he stepped onto the balcony, his back to her. "Most of them will die, yes." He paused to roll his shoulders and bend his neck from side to side. "Those that swear fealty to the Order can live."

"None of them will do that!" came her yell-whisper as she followed him outside. Usually, at this time, the roar of liveliness from downtown would be spilling through the entirety of Canto Bight. But after today's battle, the entire city had shut down, leaving nothing outside but them and the crickets. "It's a death sentence for the entire Resistance!"

"Then Starkiller will grant them a swift death," Kylo said, lowering his voice as he turned to face her. "As enemies actively trying to kill me, that is more than they deserve."

"Okay then," came her snippy remark, "you're saying if they submit to you and the Order, they can live?"

His flinty eyes bored into her. "Yes."

"And if they don't submit?"

"They die."

"When? Do they have a grace period to think about it?"

"No," Kylo replied through a tight jaw. "Their cooperation is expected immediately."

"Ah, got it, got it," Rey said, nodding her head with exaggerated movements. "And the ones you want to fuck? What happens to them?"

Confusion rippled across his face, followed by understanding. Panicked understanding, as Kylo registered her implication. The way his perfectly composed expression faltered, she knew that she had landed on a sensitive topic. She took a step toward him. Good.

"What? You don't got an answer for me?" she asked sardonically. "How hypocritical. You accuse me of being unable to have a grown-up conversation, yet the only thing you want to discuss is my trauma and how it benefits you. But not this. Not the rathtar in the room. Because that would mean facing whatever the fuck this is, and you've been too busy avoiding me to do that, right, Supreme Leader?" Once she had backed him up against the railing of the balcony, she stopped, planting her hands on her hips and keeping her penetrative stare locked on his face. She welcomed the cool breeze that swept over her flushed face as her heart beat wildly in her chest. "Well?"

Kylo could barely look at her. "I don't know what you're—"

"I'm talking about this!" Rey hissed, gesturing between their bodies. "You know, this wild sensation between us that we spoke about once, maybe twice? This thing that we both ignore, even though it gets stronger every day? Yeah, I'm talking about that. So, let me ask you again, Supreme Leader—what do you plan on doing with the enemies like me?"

Kylo remained silent, but his inconsistent gaze and uneasy stance spoke volumes. He looked like a trapped animal. It was in this moment, as the glow from the lights inside spilled through the balcony doors and coated him in an orange warmth, Rey saw her captor for what he truly was. Not Kylo Ren, the Master of the Knights of Ren or the Supreme Leader of the galaxy, but instead, just a man. A beautiful, sad man, cased in a shadow of fear, just as she had seen earlier today when she warned him about the thin line between hate and love.

Love.

The word reverberated in her mind, leaving deep grooves of pain with each shock wave it sent throughout her body. Rey could never assume this man loved her; she had never assumed anyone loved her. It's why she hated herself for saying it to Drox today. It's why she had wanted Kylo to remind her that she was his—it was the closest thing she had to love. And he was right, she did like that he wanted her all to himself. It was pathetic. She was pathetic. Even if the Supreme Leader was keeping her alive for more than just sex, and the connection between them meant something, it didn't matter. None of this did. She was still his prisoner, and he was still her captor.

Prisoner. Captor. Enemies.

Something inside of Rey shattered. Was she really this desperate for affection that she tried to coerce her enemy into admitting his feelings for her? What was wrong with her? Limb by limb, she felt her body fall into repose with sheer and utter exhaustion. Her shoulders slumped, the hands on her hips falling dejectedly to her sides. She began to doubt her ability to stay upright as she turned to pivot, stiff with shame as she mumbled, "Never mind."

"Wait, wait," Kylo rasped, wrapping his hand firmly around Rey's arm and pulling her against him. The movement made her head spin, but he steadied her against him, so warm and solid and strong. "There are no enemies like you." His eyes darted across her face and his fingers dug into her arm. "Do you understand me?"

"Wh-what?" Rey stammered, head spinning with his closeness. She tried to step back as she shook her head, his sudden intensity making her squirm. "No, I, I don't understand. Let go of—"

"Yes, you do," he insisted, voice resonant as he kept her fused against him. "You're right. I have been avoiding you. Because ever since I almost lost you, I realized I don't want to live without you, Rey. I refuse to. And I don't know how to handle that. I'm sorry."

Dizzy. She felt so dizzy as she digested his words. Intoxicated not only by the colossal amount of alcohol she had consumed tonight, but also by his presence, so intense and heavy and demanding. She had to work very hard to keep her voice steady. "What are you saying, Kylo?"

"I'm telling you what you need to hear. I'm telling you the truth," he said matter-of-factly, releasing her arm to let her stumble back. "You are not Force-sensitive, but we have the same, diseased darkness living inside of us. It surrounds us. It calls to us. It used to be alarming, but now it feels familiar, like home. Like it belongs to me, with me. Just like you."

Fear flooded her belly. Raw and ripe and overpowering, Rey folded her arms against her chest and took another step back. "Why would you want me? You don't even know me."

"But I do," Kylo insisted without hesitation, moving toward her. "The things you've been through, anyone else would have caved into darkness. But not you," he said, cornering her against the balcony door. "You channel your anger and hatred into ridding the Wor Gromans of the galaxy to protect the innocent, and when killing someone isn't feasible, you use humor and wit to cope instead. Because that's easier than feeling the sharp edge of your pain—the same reason why you resort to violence instead of confronting your feelings."

Rey swallowed and cast her eyes down, the torment of his truths tearing her insides apart, but Kylo didn't miss a beat as he continued to ever-so-casually unveil her soul.

"I also know you're fiercely loyal to those you love. You would kill for your people. You have killed for them and would die for them just as quickly. And, most importantly, I know that after today, you're officially sick of it. Sick of giving your all to people that don't return the favor. Tasu, my mother, Drox—they take, and take, and take, but never reciprocate. They leave you empty. And that, Kitten, is the real reason you're here right now, looking to your enemy for affection. Not because you're pathetic. Not because you're desperate. But because you know that if we faced this connection together, neither of us would be empty. Neither of us would be alone. Not anymore."

The crickets chirped all around them, the moons high and bright in the sky as Kylo looked at Rey in a way that stripped her bare. She couldn't move. She could barely breathe. She remained stiff and still against the door, her whole body buzzing with apprehension. Just moments ago, this dynamic had been reversed as she tried to get him to admit his feelings to her. But now that she got what she wanted, she was terrified.

"I...I don't know what to say, Kylo," she whispered, eyes dropping to his chest. She swallowed. "Too much has happened between us. Too much hurt."

"Yes. I've done monstrous things to you. I know," he said, shifting in impatience. "I thought Skywalker sent you here to destroy me, which is why I hurt you the way I did. For that, I am sorry. I am." Kylo's voice held so much sincerity it shocked her, forcing her to look at him, confirming those words did, indeed, come from his mouth. When their eyes locked, he leaned in, speaking with a burning passion. "You're right, Rey. It was hypocritical of me to avoid you. But I'm here now. I'm telling you that what we have, it's real. It's deep." In a moment of hesitation, he glanced down, his lips shakily pressing together before continuing. "It always has been, ever since we were children."

She jolted back. "Children?" she asked, forehead creasing in confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"That night in Sector 45B..." Kylo started, then gave an abrupt shake of his head. "No. It's easier if I show you."

He brought two fingers to Rey's temple, and she reflexively winced, jerking away from him. He slowly lowered his hand from her, dropping his eyes in what she thought was shame. She remained alert as she stared at him, waiting for his next move. Just as she had said, too much had happened between them. Too much hurt.

Kylo cleared his throat. "It's easier if I show you," he repeated, returning his gaze back to her face. Warily, he raised his hand but kept it low. This time, he waited for her to acknowledge his request before continuing. "May I?"

All Rey could manage was a stiff nod. His movements were slow as he raised his hand, gauging her reaction as though he wanted to allow her the opportunity to change her mind. But she didn't, and the moment he pressed his fingers against her temple, she was ripped from her body and thrust into a wormhole of memories moving faster than lightspeed.

One second, Rey saw herself as a newborn, covered in her mother's blood, and the next, she was in an underground fighting ring, covered in someone else's blood as the Kanjiklub rooted her on from the sidelines. It was disorienting and dizzying, and as the sound of children echoed all around her—screaming, laughing, and playing, she knew exactly where this journey was taking her. She tried to resist, but it was too late. Violently, she was spat out in the middle of the auditorium of the Coruscant Orphanage—the beautiful, yet horrid, place she grew up in. This common area, in particular, was a repurposed ballroom complete with tall, airy ceilings and elegant architecture much too festive for all the pain and suffering it housed.

She spun around, scanning the room for a sign as to why she was there. Children were everywhere, but their faces were just a blur. She squinted; everything about this memory seemed too bright, too contrasted without offering any clear, distinct symmetry. But as she turned to face the back wall, one little girl came into focus. She was sitting all alone on the floor, her legs folded to her chest and her chin on her knee.

Rey immediately recognized the orphan as herself.

The sight of her drew Rey in. Her movements were fluid as she traveled through flickering visions of children playing on the floor, each passing step bringing forth anxiety. Why am I here? Will she see me? Do I have to speak to...myself?

She gnawed on her bottom lip as she approached, but when a pop of black appeared to her right in her peripherals, she took a deep breath. She didn't need to look at Kylo to feel better—just knowing he was here with her in this strange, bright world helped bring her climbing heart rate back down. She took the last step toward this tiny version of herself, relieved that she didn't acknowledge or see her. Knowing she was just a spectator brought comfort. She didn't want the little girl to see what she had become. It would be too much of a disappointment, too much pain to swallow after everything she'd already been through.

Rey took a step closer, barely recognizing herself. Her clothes looked clean yet very worn, with a necklace around her neck that she vaguely remembered from her childhood. Her red, puffy eyes darted all around the room as she held her legs tightly, trying to make herself look as small as possible. She frowned. She knew that she had bad days at the orphanage, but this...this looked different. She looked different than she remembered, with her sun-kissed skin and dark bruises lining her legs and arms...

The realization did not come to Rey gently. It slammed into her like a blaster shot, forcing her to seek stability against the wall. She slumped against it, trying to suppress the rush of emotion bursting inside of her, but it was too late. The floodgates had been opened and she remembered why she looked so miserable. She was inside the memory of her first day at the orphanage.

The rest crashed down on her quickly and mercilessly. Unkar telling her to be quiet as he dragged her onto a shuttle, the cruel smile he gave her as she started to cry. The twisting of his mouth as he leered at the pilot and said, she's your problem now. The bumpy ride to Coruscant, the frigid woman that received her, locking her hand in hers as she dragged her through the doors kicking and screaming. The doctor's cold fingers probing at her as she sat on the exam table, the dismissive stares as she begged them to find her parents...

"No, no, no," Rey panicked, sliding down next to the little girl as she shut her eyes and covered her ears. She didn't want to feel this. She didn't want to see this. She had forgotten this day for a reason. A sob escaped her lips as her butt landed on the floor, and she brought her knees to her chest to mirror the younger version of herself. Hot, salty tears rushed down her face as her emotions paralleled what she had felt at that moment. Abandoned. Empty. Forgotten. Alone.

"Rey," Kylo said, muffled as it reached through her fingers and penetrated her eardrums. She just shook her head, keeping her eyes shut as she hung her head low. He tried again. "Rey, look."

This time, his command came to her with clarity and power. Sniffling, she slid her hands off her ears and opened her eyes. Kylo crouched in front of her at the same moment a young boy plopped down beside him. He had jet-black hair and warm, brown eyes, wearing clothes befitting a Resistance fighter. He smiled at the younger version of Rey.

"Hi, I'm Ben." He held his hand out for her to shake. "What's your name?"

Rey's mouth dropped open. Extending her legs in front of her, she rapidly looked between Kylo and Ben and wondered how she hadn't recognized the little boy immediately. Albeit twenty years apart, they were one and the same. But the similarities in appearance weren't the only indication. She felt him, just as she could sense the all-too-familiar connection between him and the little girl. It was stifling and overpowering, just like the bond she felt with Kylo now as an adult.

"It's okay. You can talk to me. I promise I won't hurt you," Ben continued after she didn't shake his hand. He cracked her a big, goofy smile and offered her his pinky instead. "Pinky promise."

Heart thumping in her chest, Rey peeled her back off the wall and shifted to get a better view of the little girl tentatively outstretching her hand to intertwine her pinky with his. As she heard her say her name, Rey felt Kylo's gaze transfixed on her face, but she couldn't look away. She was too enthralled watching Ben Solo interact with the scared, young girl she used to be.

"I like the name Rey. That's a pretty name," Ben said, nodding once in approval. After flitting his eyes down the length of her malnourished, tiny body, he slung his satchel off his shoulder and opened it. "Hey, you hungry?" He didn't wait for a response before he began to rifle through it, his long, black hair falling in his face. "My Uncle Chewie took me to SpaceStop this morning, so I have lots of candy if you want some."

The little girl's face lit up at this, watching with curious eyes as Ben shuffled through things in his bag, speaking a hypermile a minute. "SpaceStop has the best candy. Waaaay better than StarMart. Chewie takes me there all the time because he's always babysitting me. Even though I'm not a baby anymore. I'm 11. But my mom is always busy doing big, important things, and my dad is usually gone, so that means I get to hang out with the big fur ball all day," he said, barely pausing to catch his breath as he glanced up and used his free hand to point across the room. "That's him, over there, next to my mom." Then, with an intensity that he still possessed today, Ben suddenly turned to face the little girl. "Do you like her hair?"

Small Rey gave a timid nod. "Yes. The braids are very pretty."

He cracked a sly smile. "Thanks. I did them," he said before returning his attention to his satchel as he continued to rummage around for the candy. "She lets me do that sometimes, you know. Except she almost always redoes them after I leave her quarters, but today she didn't have the chance to because I've been tagging along for work. I can do that since it's summer break and all. I guess she tries to hide that from me, so she doesn't hurt my feelings. But I notice, ya know? I always do. Do you braid your hair, too? I like your buns. They look nice."

Rey laughed through her tears as the little girl beside her puffed up her cheeks and exhaled, eyes widening when Ben didn't give her a chance to respond, instead talking about how he braided Chewie's hair once while he slept. It was obvious that she was having a hard time keeping up with his extroverted energy, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Geez, where did the candy go? Did I already eat it?" Ben mumbled, cutting himself off mid-sentence. She told him it was alright, but he insistently kept searching, his tongue peeking out between his lips as he concentrated. "No, no, I know it's in here somewhere...AHA! Found it!" he exclaimed with a victorious grin, his hand emerging from his bag with a fistful of sweets. "Here, cup your hands together! I got a lot for you!"

She giggled as Ben dropped a heap of colorfully wrapped treats in her palms. Besides the occasional mmm, they fell quiet as they ate their candy together, and she took the rare moment of silence to look at Kylo. He was still crouching beside the tiny version of himself, watching her intently with a somberness that felt so out of place in contrast to the chatty young boy next to him. Knowing that he, too, lived a life that robbed him of this innocence made her heart ache.

Rey let out a whisper over the indistinct chatter of the auditorium, tears rolling down her cheeks. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Kylo didn't respond right away, breaking eye contact as he swallowed. "I didn't know how."

The younger versions of themselves began talking again, but she kept her focus on Kylo. "How long have you known?"

"Since Sector 45B," he muttered, glancing off to the side. He spoke distractedly as Rey followed his gaze to see General Organa talking with the orphanage coordinator. "My mother told me."

It was only an undeveloped, lambent vision of her, but rancor still found its way into Rey's tone at the sight of the woman that had wronged her. "This is why she chose me to get captured? Because we knew each other as kids?"

The Supreme Leader looked at her with sad eyes. "Partly, yes."

"I don't understand," she insisted, shaking her head as her chest heaved with anger. "Why would she do this? Why would this change anything?"

Kylo nodded to his left, directing her attention to Ben. "Keep watching."

As Rey turned toward Ben, he jumped excitedly to his feet. "Hey, I found somewhere really cool today!" He held his hand out for the little girl to take. "Wanna go?"

Displaying her two missing front teeth with a smile, she slipped her hand into his. "Where is it?" she asked as he pulled her to her feet. Even as kids, the height difference was extreme. "Is it close by?"

Both of them stood up to follow as Ben led her to the back exit. "Nope. It's across the entire city, but that's okay. I know a shortcut. Follow me!"

Right as he began to pick up his pace, small Rey dropped his hand and came to a halt, nervously playing with her fingers. He spun around with a face full of concern. "What's wrong?" Then, just as fast, understanding flickered in his eyes. "Oh, don't worry, it won't be dangerous—you'll be with me! I'm going to be a Jedi one day, just like my uncle. The Jedi keep everyone safe." He held out his hand again. "Come on, take my hand. I'll protect you, milady."

Pain twisted her gut at how proudly Ben proclaimed he would be a Jedi, and the way Kylo very pointedly kept his attention on the memory and not on Rey as she glanced over at him with pity in her eyes. She exhaled as she looked back at the little girl. She was still quiet, but she knew the real reason why she was hesitant to follow him.

A pensive expression found Ben's face. "You're sad. I sense it," he said, taking a timid step closer. "I'm sorry, Rey. Did I make you sad?"

"No, no, it's not you," she said, adamantly shaking her head. "It's just...I don't know if I'm allowed to go with you, and I don't want to get in trouble. I was told I can't be a bad kid anymore, or no one will want me."

Ben took a step closer to her, standing taller and puffing out his chest. "Who says you're a bad kid?"

She fell quiet for a moment, looking down at her feet and shuffling her shoes against the shiny floors. "Unkar did."

"Well, I don't know who Unkar is, but he sounds like a big bully," Ben said loudly and with conviction, planting his hands on his waist and giving her a stern nod. "You're a good kid, I can tell. Everyone will want you, and I won't let you get in trouble. I promise."

Small Rey looked up at him with nervous eyes. "Pinky promise?"

Ben nodded and extended his hand to her. "Pinky promise."

Right after they linked their pinkies together, Rey and Kylo were thrust back through the wormhole that brought them here. Bright flashes of light and sound and shapes sped by them, revealing glimpses into the summer they spent together. Running through the wildflowers, playing hide and go seek in the temple, climbing trees in the meadow, swimming in the lake, laying in the tall grass...it all came back to her now. The happy place she had seen in her head all these years was a real place. The land she had dreamt about her entire life, where she had spoken to Kylo in her dreams that week he was on Exegol...it was real.

Rey thought she had created it in her mind as an escape, but no, she saw now that it derived from these experiences with Ben that she had buried deep inside of her. Because even though it was the best few months of her life, it eventually came to an end. The visions were over in a blink of an eye, the vortex spitting them into a final memory she recalled instantly—Ben's last day on Coruscant. She felt Kylo behind her as she stood atop the temple in ruins, watching the younger version of themselves speak with a heavy cloak of grief draped upon their shoulders.

"Can I go home with you now?" she asked, clutching his hand. "I want parents, too."

"My mother said we can't take you with us," Ben said, tears brimming in his big, brown eyes. "I want to, but I can't."

The pain on the little girl's face echoed Rey's now, in the present. "But... you pinky promised me. Please don't leave me."

"I don't have a choice, Rey," he said with barely constrained emotion, tears pouring down his face. "I'm so sorry."

"Wait, don't cry," she whispered, reaching for his face. "I didn't mean to make you sad."

The memory began to deteriorate around her, the mountains closing in and the wildflowers burning to a crisp as the temple shook beneath her. But she knew what happened next: the Millennium Falcon landed at the bottom of the hill beside the lake. A huffy Han Solo stepped down the ramp to call out to Ben, telling him it was time to leave. After a shared tear-filled embrace, Ben ran down the stairs of the temple to go home, leaving the little girl all alone with a void in her chest that would only get bigger over time. Rey squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the memory to collapse.

When she opened them next, she was back in Canto Bight, standing on the balcony of the Supreme Leader's hotel room as he stood in front of her. She blinked rapidly, waiting for the pain of the memory to weigh her down, but as the seconds ticked by, Rey only felt lighter, as though an immense weight riddled with conflict and uncertainty had been lifted off her shoulders, revealing something she could no longer cast aside.

The raw, undeniable connection between them.

Her heart rate picked up in her chest. Her hands felt clammy. Slicing through the shared stunned silence in the aftermath of their journey, the Supreme Leader began to talk quickly and nervously, in a stream of consciousness just like he used to do as a kid. But she didn't hear him as she tried to orientate herself in her body, because she, too, felt like the younger version of herself right now—vulnerable.

Thump, thump, thump. Kylo chattered on, but the sound of Rey's hammering pulse was all she could hear. The trip into the past did more than just reveal how deep this connection went. It ripped her from the fortress of steel she built around herself and forced her to feel. The defense mechanism she had constructed to protect herself was gone, leaving her exposed. Leaving her receptive. It expanded within her until it reached her toes and the crown of her head, filling her wholly and changing her. The shift into fragility was so distinct, so powerful, she looked down, expecting to see remnants of her tough exterior shattered into pieces at her feet. But no. It was just the two of them standing on the balcony, bodies close together as the tether between them buzzed with vitality.

The connective was so tenacious, so prominent, Rey couldn't believe she didn't feel it the moment she first saw him on Mos Eisley. She felt intrinsically linked with him, a tie that started within her and ended inside him, her enemy, her captor. A monster, and yet, the fear she felt wasn't because she was near him, this cruel man. It was because now that she let him in, now that she let herself feel this connection to the full extent, she couldn't imagine not having it, not having him. And as she let that realization wash over her, quelling all her excuses and hesitations, she lifted her head and looked up at the man she loved to hate.

"...after Exegol, I realized that it didn't matter why we feel like this. But even then, that doesn't change what I've done to you, I know. I'm sorry. I, I need to tell you something, Kitten, if you'll just—"

Rey cut him off with a kiss. The way her face gravitated to his, it just felt right. He felt right as he stepped into her, snaking his arms around her body and groaning in her mouth. Her head spun as she hoisted herself up, her legs wrapping around his waist as his hands found the bottom of her thighs to secure her against him. Slipping his tongue between her lips, Kylo carried her back inside, not breaking the kiss as he strode to the bedroom.

It wasn't until he set her down that Rey pulled away, sucking in a deep breath as her head dropped against the pillows. She looked up at him as he hovered over her from the side of the bed, slightly woozy as he began to undress. Despite the copious amounts of alcohol she had consumed earlier in the evening, the effects had now almost dissipated, but she still assumed he wouldn't want to be intimate after he had already turned her down. She figured the taxing venture into the past would have been a mood-killer, but she wasn't complaining as she hastened to remove her clothes.

As she hurriedly lifted her hips off the bed to yank off her pants, Rey couldn't understand why Kylo was undressing at the absolute slowest pace imaginable, but that didn't stop her from tugging on her blouse and unclasping her bra with ungraceful, yet determined movements. She swayed slightly as she moved on to her panties, but he stopped her, grabbing her wrists.

"Not tonight," he said, shaking his head once. "Not like this."

Rey peered up at him in silence. Her first instinct was to be embarrassed again, but there was no way she could ever feel rejected by a man that looked at her with such hunger. He shamelessly let his gaze roam all over her body, his dark hair hanging in his eyes with his strong jaw set into a hard line, tense and tight, like he was exercising all his self-control not to push her down onto the bed to take her this very second. She bit her lip, her eyes finding the lump in his throat, bobbing up and down as he swallowed. She wanted to run her tongue along it, feel the roughness of his stubble and—

Kylo cupped Rey's jaw, ending both of their wandering gazes. "Okay?"

She blinked, then looked down and nodded, not trusting herself to speak. She clutched the comforter, pulling it over her goosebump-lined arms as Kylo finished stripping down, save for his boxers. Feeling slightly self-conscious about her sudden lack of clothing, Rey glanced around the room, looking for anything other than her blouse to sleep in, but found nothing.

Fuck it. I'll just sleep half-nude. With a sigh, she was about to lie down, but Kylo motioned for her to stop. Bunching up the black undershirt he just took off, he carefully placed it over her head, letting it loop around her neck as a ring of fabric. Then, he helped her put her arms through the sleeves and climbed into bed next to her.

Rey felt him get situated beside her, but she didn't look at him, not yet. Her eyes were fixed on the article of clothing he had curtained over her frame, the sheer size of it swallowing her much-smaller body whole. Her fingertips gently twisting the material as a deep, rich warmth spread throughout her. To him and to anybody else, this was just a t-shirt. To her, it was much, much more than that.

Kylo's hand found the small of her back. "Rey? Are you—"

She turned toward him. He was lying comfortably on his back, so she plopped onto her side and tightly wrapped her arm around his midsection, eliciting the umph he blew through his lips. Then, Rey slung her leg over his lower body, clinging to him like a child with their favorite stuffed animal. As her cheek sunk into his bare chest, a part of her started to panic that this type of closeness was too much, that the Supreme Leader of the galaxy wouldn't want her to do such a thing as snuggle him.

But those anxieties didn't have a chance to materialize as Kylo draped an arm around Rey's back to tug her closer. With one hand clutching the small of her waist, and the other lazily playing with her hair, she had never felt more content. She took a deep breath, sucking down his presence. She was quite literally wrapped in a warm haze of his scent, but she wanted more, so she inhaled, again and again, staving off the drowsiness that threatened to pull her under.

When she felt herself drifting off, her eyelids too heavy to keep open, Rey finally caved, letting the sound of her enemy's heartbeat coax her into a deep and dreamless sleep.