Super Mario Bros Movie Rewrite

Bowser Vs Peach

A group of koopa troopers towards the two of them, screaming their lungs off while pointing spears at the duo. Princess Peach, however, doesn't allow them to get any closer, but instead freezes them. Their blocks slide up to a large pile of koopa soldier filled ice blocks.

Peach: "COME ON, MARIO! HURRY UP AND CHECK THE REST OF THE ROOMS! WE ONLY HAVE SO LONG BEFORE THEY START SENDING IN ACTUALLY HARD ENEMIES!"

Frozen Goomba: "Hey!"

Peach: "I'm not going to apologize to you! You know what you did!"

Frozen Goomba: "Yeah, you're right..."

Mario slams a door shut as he groans and shakes his head.

Mario: "I WOULD LOVE TO FINISH THIS UP PRINCESS, REALLY, I WOULD! BUT THERE ARE LIKE A THOUSAND HALLWAYS IN THIS PLACE AND WE HAVEN'T EVEN SEARCHED ONE OF THEM!"

Peach: "THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE COMPLAINING WHEN YOU SHOULD STILL BE LOOKING!"

Mario: "WELL, MAYBE IF YOU HELPED TOO, THEN-"

Peach lifts a Hammer Brother up by the neck as he slowly freezes over, his last breaths exhaling out of his body in a ghostly gasp as the ice block forms around Peach's hand. She then turns back to Mario with a slightly bruised face and her eyes widened.

Peach: "Don't....."

Mario groans and then throws his hands up.

Mario: "FINE! I'LL LOOK FASTER!"

Mario opens a door to see a stockpile of bullet bills.

Mario: "Nope!"

Mario opens a door to see a beauty salon with a poster telling you that Bowser's hair is in style.

Mario: "NOPE!"

Mario opens a door to see a empty stable with multiple wanted posters of multiple missing Yoshis.

Mario: "NOPE!"

Mario opens a door to see a group of goombas playing cards around a table. Each one has Bowser's hair style on their heads in different colors. They all stop and look at him. One leans forward.

Bowser Hair Goomba: "....Please don't tell our boss...."

Mario looks at all of them and then throws a snow ball at each at rapid speed, causing them all to freeze over. He then slams the door shut.

Mario: "NO!"

Mario then goes on a spree where he opens doors, checks inside quickly, and then closes them.

Mario: "NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO-NO!"

He stops and walks over to the Princess as she rests to the freshly made wall of frozen bodies behind her.

Mario: "THERE'S NO HOPE PRINCESS! THIS HALLWAY IS TOO LONG AND EVERY SINGLE DOOR I CHECKED HAD NO PRISONERS INSIDE! WHAT ARE WE GOING TO-"

Peach: "Oh hey, you opened all the doors."

Mario: "Huh?"

Mario looks down the hall to see that every door is slightly ajar.

Mario: "Woah.....could've sworn I slammed those shut though!"

Peach: "Maybe you should focus more on your technique and less on your attitude, plumber boy."

Mario: "And maybe you should focus on fighting our enemies instead of checking me out and then yelling at me about said technique!"

Peach: "Hey! I wasn't checking you out!"

Mario: "Sorry Princess, but I know those look! You're just head over heels for my gorgeous face!"