Touch (Z.S) (Rewriting)

Epilogue

Dear friends,

I want you to know that I love you. You all have a special place in my heart, even after I went into silence. I can't begin to explain how sorry I am for ignoring all of you. Of course, some of you found the reason to be right in front of you but others won't understand. I want you to all know that I, in no way, am blaming any of you for what I'm about to do.

I'm writing this just to tell you good bye.

This is a decision that was so hard to make but in the end, this was my best option. There's nothing left to do. I've tried everything but nothing worked. I couldn't talk to anyone about this, I didn't even want to leave my room. I don't know how to deal with these emotions so I'm down to my final option; this one.

Niall, I love you so much. You've been here since my early days and you've supported me and I hope you have a great future with Louis. Please don't be sad, be happy. This is what I want, I will finally be at peace. I won't feel any emotion, and for me, that'll be paradise. And I'm sorry for ignoring you whenever you tried to speak with me, thank you so much for trying to help me.

Zayn, thank you for teaching me what love was like. You're an amazing man and I miss you and you probably won't care but I need you to know that I love you. Have a great life with your husband. Thanks for everything.

Luke, please be happy. Don't let this make you become a sad person. Being sad isn't fun, trust me on this. Live your life, find love(be careful), and be happy. Promise me you won't let this get to you. Just continue to go on with your life as if I never stepped in the picture.

Louis, thank you for being there even when I wouldn't speak or even move. You tried to make me laugh and hell, before all of this, you always made me laugh. You always made me feel happier when I was in a terrible mood. I want to thank you for making me happy while I could be.

Liam, Alex, Michael, Ashton, and to anyone else I know of and forgot to mention(can't quite think straight right now...), thank you for supporting me and being my friend. I can't thank you enough for even being able to stand around me and for helping me. You've all helped me grow as a person and I love you all very much.

But now, my time is up. I need to go. This pain isn't normal. It feels like a slow death. I swear no one in this world has felt as much pain as I'm feeling right now, as selfish as it sounds.

I don't want to live. This pain is mental and physical. I can't bear it. I don't want to feel it anymore. I don't want to feel anything anymore.

I'm tired of simply slitting my wrists and burning my skin to feel no emotion. That's all temporary. Yes it numbs me, but only for a couple of hours then it's back to tears and/or more self inflicted damage to my body. I never want to feel emotion ever again, and I know just the way to solve my problem.

In fact, I know how to make my solution look like an accident. No one has to know what I did. They can simply say it was an accident and no questions will be asked.

Please, to whoever finds my note, grant my final wish; don't mourn over me. In fact, forget me after you read this. I don't want you to live with the thought of me. I want to be gone. Like I never existed. I know this is very selfish of me but I don't know what to do anymore with myself.

Now, I guess this is the end. To whoever reads this first, please don't spread this like its gossip. Please just tell my closest friends and anyone who played a major role in my life. If someone else asks, just simply tell them that I've passed away in an accident, nothing more. I don't want everyone going off about 'Harry Styles committing suicide'. Please keep it on a low. I love you.

Good bye.

All the love, Harry Styles

...

Niall, hours later after this note was written, found Harry's note in Harry's bedroom. Of course, he was in tears. This was unbelievable to him. The same boy who once loved life and was always so jolly and happy was taking his own life. He couldn't read the entire note. He was already crying by the end of the first paragraph.

He looked everywhere. In fact, he put together a little search party to look around for where Harry could be. This little group consisted of Luke, Louis, Liam, Michael, Alex, and a few more. Everyone but Zayn. Let me tell you, everyone especially Niall and Louis were pissed Zayn wasn't there. They were furious and they wished to never see him again. They utterly hated him from that point on.

After hours and hours of searching for him, Alex and Liam managed to find Harry during their long drive. They contacted everyone else right away, Niall and Louis first of course. They hoped that it wasn't too late for Harry.

Harry took his car and went off to the woods where no one was driving. He wasn't going to be the type to crash into another car and take another innocent life along with his. He swerved off the road, his car rolling down a hill and crashing into a large tree.

All that can be said is that both the car and Harry were in terrible condition. What happened to him after will remain unknown.

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Well, this is the official end of Touch...

Thank you guys so much for reading, the feedback on this was amazing and I hope you guys are there to support me with the future books! Love you guys!

P.S. refer to my authors note in chapter 43 ;-)