Disasters of Brazil

Chapter 12

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Dear Mom and Dad,

This day was awesome yet chaotic for me. It felt like I was 
in a place full of comfort. Matt, the guy friend of mine which
I admire his actions joined the basketball try-outs. Mom and Dad,

he can play the sport very well. He has it everything. I like it,

I'm happy about it. When he's happy, his smile, that "yallo"

he says then smiling while losing his eyes is just comforting to me.
I wish you could meet my friend Matt Cywell Stephens. He's an 

awesome guy. He's sporty. Has a good speed, agility, coordination,

reaction time. You know Mom and Dad, I write letters to you as my 
coping mechanism. It's the only way I can express myself to my

 parents without their presence. It's painful, devastating, frustrating,
excruciating, gut-wretching, almost 

every pain I feel by not even getting to meet my parents. I have no parents.

My brother and me has no parents. Both of them are in the sky, roaming around
with the angels. After all these times, I thought I was okay but I wasn't.
I was never okay, when I see people being happy with their parents, hanging around,

family bonding, family outing, going to the beach with their families,

attending graduation, putting medals on their child's neck, praising their 
child for a good work, asking them if they're okay, hugging them when

they're hurt, kissing their foreheads, telling them night stories. It's just

painful.

I wish you were here with me Mom and Dad. I miss you both so much.It hurts....it hurts... everything hurts...... Times are rough. I thought I can

totally live a life without thinking "Where are my parents?" and "Where's me 

and my brother with our parents?". 
There was past you Mom and Dad, there's no present for the both of you, but

I can have a future with you both up there. I know it's just too dramatic for me

to write this letter but it's the way I cope. I know for some reason that journaling

isn't the traditional way of writing nowadays but I want it to write for the both

of you.

I want you to guide me through-out. Without your presence but your Angelic
presence is there to guide me. I'm your daughter with full heart and my brother too.
Just why is the world cruel to our family? 
Did our family commit something that's why me and my brother are suffering

like shit?

If yes what is it?

I want to know.

What if there are secrets behind all of this? Mom and Dad, if you can hear me,

Roberta Barraquias, please help me in life, myself.

I hope you will understand too why I can see Matt as a comfort person.

But not someone to fully rely on. It's hard to rely on someone, especially