Chapter 1. It's That Bad (Sky)

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   Love sucks. I hate love. Passionately. 🤢

   My resentment against this wretched, uninvited, torturous feeling is stronger than any other emotion I have ever experienced... except love itself. I despise the daydreaming, the constant craving, and all the disappointment that comes with longing desperately for someone I can never have. 

   Love is literally the worst thing that can happen to someone like me. I had five long, miserable years to prove it and explore the very depths of hopelessness and anguish. I come from the dark side, aka WU - Vienna University of Economics and Business. I am a survivor of the greatest disaster that can happen to an innocent, young soul, sent by a demanding billionaire stepfather to study abroad. And that would be crushing on the most inappropriate person. 

   I spent all those years hiding in the corners of the vast lecture halls, and sneaking glances at the object of my unrequited affections - the ravishing sex god, the boy with the misty, warm, brown eyes, messy dark hair and the most disarming smile that has ever existed, everyone's wet dream, Jason Marchetti. 

   Despite the fact that we had something in common - Italian fathers, married to American mothers, I knew perfectly well that I didn't have a snowball's chance in hell of attracting his attention. To be honest, it was not my goal either. I rather hoped he would never notice me, and he did not disappoint. I was no one. Jason was the crown prince. He never learned my name. We never exchanged more than a few greetings at the wild parties, which were the living hell for me, but the perfect environment to thrive for Jason. I went there only for the opportunity to stare at him from a distance. That was his little kingdom. He won all hearts at hello, always in the spotlight, dancing on a table, winning a drinking competition, or initiating a nude swim in the early morning hours. I suspect he also slept with anyone who was willing to do it, which practically meant absolutely everyone... except me. Not that I wasn't willing. I guess I did not qualify for any of the categories he liked, which were basically all possible types of girls and some type of guys, mainly hot, cute, and cheeky. Yup, not me.

   Love's most horrifying quality, though, is that it is uncontrollable. I could do nothing to stop it. If there were anti-love pills, I would have taken a handful without a blink. The person who invents them one day will become filthy rich for sure. Unfortunately, I doubt it will happen within my lifetime. I am doomed to despair, and nothing can stop the pain. The two years I spent defending my Master's degree in Bologna, having no clue where Jason was, did not change a thing. I can assure you with one hundred percent certainty that the expression "out of sight, out of mind" is not always true.

   "Don't be such a dramatic idiot," I mutter under my breath and squint at my round, flushed face in the mirror. 

   God, I hate the blond mess of unruly strands that surrounds it. This terrible hair color makes my puffy cheeks look even redder. I look like a cherub, pulled straight out of a Leonardo Da Vinci painting, but not as sweet and innocent. Pathetic. Can a reflection be erased? I do not want one. I point a finger at the annoying image. It has the audacity to roll its cornflower blue eyes at me. If they were not that big, someone could describe them as nice. But with this size, the only association they evoke is of a wide-eyed fish. I am tempted to improve the unrepairable with just a little eyeliner, but my father will kill me, so it is out of the question. I frown. "I truly, deeply hate you, Skylar."

   I avert my gaze in utter disappointment with myself. Why am I looking at the mirror? What happened to the decision not to do it ever again? I should have also thrown the cursed object away. Mirrors are too dangerous for people with no self-esteem but possessing an abundance of extra pounds and a primal fear of fitness equipment. I can not do myself even this little favor and get rid of the most stressful item in my apartment. Looking at my luscious body is bad, but I do like my clothes. Father thinks I am obsessed with them. Maybe he is right. But what else do I have? Yeah, you got it right. I am an oddball. I wish I was not, but it can not be helped. And a total slut for Jason. But he will never know it, and we will never see each other again after the graduation, so it is fine. Let me live in my dream world.  

   "You..." I glare at my reflection again, but no word seems scornful enough, so I only shake my head and give up.

   Having taken my morning dose of self-hatred, self-pity and self-reprimanding, I finally put my absolutely gorgeous Armani jacket on and head for the door, intending to leave the safety of my beloved penthouse. It is situated on the top, thirty first floor of the newest residential and office tower, rising in the middle of Rome's central business district, and proudly sporting the pompous name of Palazzo De Angelis. Dad built it. He named it after the family castle in Genova, which is now my older stepbrother's home. Luca is more than happy to have the title Conte De Angelis. It helps his great success among women, he says. I do not care about aristocratic titles and do not have one either. I am just a shy, awkward, sad boy... or rather man at twenty five. 

   My life is that bad.

   I know what you are thinking. This brat is well-heeled and rolling in luxury, pretty spoiled too, and yet all he does is whining about not liking his hair and complexion color and being too much of a chicken to confess his feelings to the person he is madly in love with. Well, I totally agree. In fact, I am constantly repeating this same thing to myself, although, it is not exactly like that.

   Let me tell you about my loving stepdad, the well-known business tycoon Conte Massimiliano De Angelis. We will talk again then. Maybe, you will feel some compassion for me. If you do not, it is ok. I totally do not deserve it anyway. 

   God, I wish I knew where Jason is now. He would fit so well into the nightlife of Rome. Not that I know anything about it.

   Sorry, that was totally random.

   Sorry, that was totally random

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Rome skyline and St. Peter's Basilica

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A/N

Hello at the end of Chapter 1.

Thank you for choosing to take on this new journey with me!

I am so excited to start this new story. 😏

I appreciate your constant support so much.

This is our lovesick, and a bit dramatic protagonist, Skylar De Angelis. 

What are your first impressions?

For those who have read SAFE and the name sounds familiar - Yeah, you are right. This is Luca's little brother. The two books are not related in any other way, though, so you can read them in any order you like, or chose whichever you want.

Our beloved couple David and Ryo may, or may not make a cameo further in the story 😉

Have fun, share your thoughts, and don't forget to vote if you liked the chapter.

Love: Anny ❤️❤️❤️

Photo 60742140 / Blond Man © Mirmoor | Dreamstime.com

Photo 175238376 © Gennaro Leonardi | Dreamstime.com

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