Children Of The Abyss

Paralyzed

"there's nothing useful in these books." Kaeya said, slamming the last book shut and aggressively standing up. He's been at this all night and like all the other nights, not a lick of useful information. He was starting to get annoyed, all he wanted was to find a solution to end his people's suffering, but no one seems to know how to break a curse especially one that's set by a god. Maybe it wasn't meant to be broken. Maybe his people were supposed to be punished. After all, they were all sinners, just like him. Kaeya hadn't realized that he had been crying hot, angry tears of frustration, staining an open roll underneath him.

"Hey," Lisa said, placing a hand on Kaeya's shoulder, "let's take a break. I'll go make some tea." Kaeya nodded, wiping the tears from his face. He stood staring at the books for a couple of minutes, waiting to make sure Lisa was gone so she wouldn't get mad at him for what he was about to do. Kaeya took a deep breath in, turned around and massaged his face with his hands before losing it. Kaeya was overcome with an emotion he' never had before. It was anger and anxiety mixed in one. He was angry at the fact that he failed, he was angry that he had turned his back on his home, that he had given up so easily, he was angry and scared. Kaeya went to knock all the books off the table but stopped as everything went in and out of focus. His hand flew to his mouth as he stumbled into the bookshelf, sinking down to the floor. Kaeya couldn't breathe, the room was spinning, and everything was blurry. He rested his head on his knees, shaking as he took shallow breaths in, trying not to sob uncontrollably, but it failed. He could faintly hear himself scream, but then it all turned to ringing

It seemed like forever, sitting there mumbling to himself, trying to stop freaking out. Is this what it had come to? Years of running, hiding behind a cheap façade and alcohol, ignoring his problems? Kaeya sat, rocking back and forth as his uncountable sobs turned to uncontrollable shaking. He heard the library door open and rushed footsteps, but he didn't look up. Kaeya knew it was Lisa, but nothing she did would be able to help him. It came as a surprise though, when tiny hands pried his away from his knees. Kaeya looked up squinting, there was a small pink blur and a tall purple blur standing in front of him, Kaya. Kaeya slid his legs out as Kaya climbed onto his lap. She cupped her hands around his face, pulling him closer and whispering in his ear.

"don't worry," she said softly, "they're okay." It was random, but for a moment, he thought that maybe she knew what he was doing, that maybe she had the same mission. Kaeya laughed a bit as she began to play with his hair. Kaya crawled off his lap as Lisa walked over. She held out a hand, helping Kaeya to his feet and embracing him. Lisa only ever hugged Jean, and Kaeya could see now why Jean liked it so much. It was meaningful, and she smelt like flowers too. Lisa smiled, running her hands down his shoulders and handing him a cup of tea.

"I found this one wandering the hallways," Lisa said gesturing to Kaya, who was sitting upside down in a chair reading a book, "I began to question how she got in but then I noticed that was your grey shirt." Lisa paused to sip her tea, watching the little girl laugh and giggle to herself as she read, "You really think you can take care of her?"

"I'm not sure," Kaeya said. he's never been more unsure of anything in his life," but I'm going to try." he'll try because if he doesn't, he might not make it. He was on the verge of succumbing to the darkness, with nothing left to live for, but then she was there. So maybe he'll have one more shot at doing something right, "please, don't tell Jean or Diluc about.... what happened."

"I won't," Lisa said, setting down her tea and getting up to leave, "get some sleep Hun." Kaeya smiled at her, nodding his head, knowing that he wasn't going to. Kaya had turned around and was sitting upwards, swinging her legs and looking around the massive room. Kaeya got up and sat next to her, there was something captivating about her eyes, they looked like the pink and purple hues of the sunsets, the ones him and Diluc would watch from the top of Dawn Winery.

"Do you think you can go back to sleep?" Kaeya asked. Kaya shook her head, her rose-gold hair mimicking the wind blowing through grass. Kaeya stood up, turning around, "let's go for a walk then." Kaya stood up and climbed onto his shoulders. Kaeya ignored the looks the guards gave him and took her on a personal tour of Mondstat and the area surrounding the city.

They went exploring in the whispering woods, picking flowers, chasing fireflies, splashing through puddles. Kaeya taught Kaya how to skip stones and fish at Starfell Lake before racing her back down the same path to Windrise. Kaya stood in awe, looking up at the massive tree behind the anemo archons statue. That had been his reaction when Diluc and Crepus had first taken him here. Kaya ran off towards the tiny cliffs the ragged rocks made over the river. The wind blew slightly, causing the Windwheel Aster to spin round like a top. Kaya enthusiastically beckoned Kaeya over to show him this amazing phaenomenon. Kaeya watched as she giggled, kicking her little feet as he placed a finger at the top of the flower, stopping its spinning and then lifting it, letting it go around again. Kaeya lay next to Kaya in the grass, watching the stars and pointing out the constellations until she fell asleep. He didn't want to move; he didn't want to disturb Kaya or the monster that was finally resting inside him. For the first time in a long time, the voices were gone, and he felt at peace, and Kaeya wished it would stay that way forever.

A/n: i couldn't think of a title. So if u have a better, more fitting one, let me know :)