Yoonmin in Malta

11 - The first night (II)

Jimin doesn't know the answer to this question, at least not one he can utter in this situation. Instead, he slowly turns to Yoongi and looks at him. He looks into the elder's tired eyes that look down at him full of sadness. He notices how worried Yoongi seems, with dark circles under his eyes and a tense expression on his face that betrays his inner turmoil. Jimin can feel Yoongi's pain and it makes his own heart ache.

Then, Yoongi breaks the silent gazes between them. His voice is low and strained, revealing the emotions he's been holding back.

"I know, you don't want to talk about what happened in Taipei, but I want you to know that I was never mad at you. I just wasn't able to approach you after that."

While Yoongi is talking, Jimin can see the pain in his face. Instantly, Jimin realizes what actually happened. Yoongi, this miserable jerk, has once again failed to express his own feelings. Yoongi didn't avoid Jimin after their fight in Taipei, at least not on purpose. He didn't dare to talk to him about it; he didn't know what to say; he just couldn't make the first move.

Jimin curses himself. How could he be so stupid as to assume that Yoongi is better at expressing his feelings than he is? Instead, he mistook Yoongi's restraint for anger. It's clear that their fight is weighing heavily on Yoongi's mind and Jimin desperately wants to take the burden off him.

So, he puts his hand on Yoongi's cheek and whispers softly, "I'm sorry."

A smile appears on Yoongi's face, even though he is surprised that there is suddenly no trace of the distance between him and Jimin that has been built up over the past weeks.

He has gathered all his courage and taken the first step. Yoongi didn't think it would be that easy either, but it doesn't matter now. He is relieved and happy to hold Jimin in his arms without him running away from him. He blames himself and his weakness. He admits to himself that he should have talked to Jimin much earlier.

In this beautiful moment, Yoongi completely forgets to apologize to Jimin, even though he initially wanted to. Instead, it was Jimin who apologized, but Yoongi quickly forgets that in his thoughtless joy.

Jimin has registered Yoongi's smile very well because suddenly thousands of butterflies swarm in his stomach. Jimin's look changes as well; the worry fades into a tender feeling of excitement. His eyes widen and his gaze digs into Yoongi's.

Slowly, Jimin leans forward and kisses Yoongi's half-open lips. All fears and insecurities magically disappear and Jimin sinks into the sensation of the moment. He enjoys the warmth and the feeling of Yoongi's lips on his. Eventually, he can feel Yoongi sinking deeper into the kiss.

As Jimin pulls away, Yoongi feels a rush of emotions flood his body. He can't believe that Jimin just kissed him, and he's not sure how to react. His mind is racing, trying to process what just happened.

Yoongi blinks a few times, trying to regain his composure. He looks at Jimin, who is still so close, and he can see the same surprise in the younger's eyes. He never thought that they would resolve their issues tonight this easily, but here they are, sharing a kiss.

As Jimin lays his head on Yoongi's shoulder, the elder can feel the calming warmth radiating from his body. The elder wraps his arm around Jimin's waist, pulling him closer. He can't believe how good it feels to have Jimin in his arms – again.

As they lay there, he thinks about how much he has missed Jimin over the past few weeks, and how much he wants to make things right between them.

While Yoongi is lost in his happy thoughts, tightly embracing Jimin, the latter feels something inside of him begins to shift.

Jimin feels a heaviness in his chest, as if something dark is pulling itself to the surface. It is tons heavy and wraps itself crushingly around his chest. It's a feeling he's had before, a sense of uncertainty and fear that he can't quite explain. Tears slowly roll down Jimin's face, stopping at Yoongi's shoulder.

He doesn't want to ruin this moment, but he can't help how he feels. He knows that he has missed Yoongi's closeness so much, but at the same time, he feels like he's not ready for this. Yoongi deserves so much more than what he can give him right now. As long as Jimin hasn't figured out his own emotions towards the elder, he doesn't want to give him false hope. He doesn't want to disappoint him, and that's what scares him the most.

As they lay there in silence, Yoongi senses that something is bothering the younger one. He notices that his shoulder is getting wet from Jimin's tears. He gently lifts Jimin's chin so that he can look into the younger man's sad eyes, but he keeps them firmly closed. Yoongi can feel that Jimin is starting to tremble and that worries him.

The whole situation reminds him painfully of their fight in Taipei. He doesn't want this evening to end like it did then, with Jimin shutting himself off from him. That incident had left Yoongi with a deep feeling of fear, and this fear comes back now as he holds Jimin in his arms.

He doesn't want to make the same mistakes again and so he stays silent. He doesn't sleep at all that night. Instead, he holds the fragile Jimin in his arms, caressing him and waiting for his slender body to relax from tiredness and finally fall asleep.