SHADOWS OF SORROW [S.S]

30 - In the Shadow of his Mind

[not proofread]

"You seem rather busy." Sebastian dropped into one of the armchairs at the library's fireplace, his robes pooling around him, forcing him to believe that abandoning them back in his dorm room could have been a better option. "I wasn't lying when I said I'd research something... Get this:" Amaya turned in her chair to face the wizard with an ambitious look in her eyes. Obviously she was sorted into Slytherin. How could he ever assume otherwise. Just because she yearned for knowledge didn't mean it was for wit but rather for a higher sort of achievement. "Fig told me about this thing. I haven't necessarily heard about it before, but he thinks I might be capable of Occlumency and Legilimency. This book-"She closed whatever she has been reading, a set of two fingers in between the pages she was just looming over, so she wouldn't lose them, eyeing the title on the black leather cover. Engraved in gold. The power of the mind. "It talks about everything that could possibly be talked about. But at the same time not enough to help me understand the gist of it all. It frustrates me..." Amaya sighed as she propped the book in her lap, her fingers slipping out of the pages as if it didn't matter where she stopped. Sebastian let his eyes travel over her face for a second, registering the frustration in her gaze, the fine lines of concentration and contemplation in between her eyebrows. "Of course you are capable of such special magic. Just the way you are able to see and use Ancient Magic. What did I expect." The wizard smiled as he focused his gaze on his hands in his lap. "It's not like I chose any of this... I told you. I'd gladly give that responsibility to someone else. I don't even look the way I used to when I first met you. All those new scars. I might just be a different witch." – "Your appearance doesn't have anything to do with who you are Amaya. And those scars are certainly better than death." A log in the hearth cracked, forcing both of their eyelids to shut for a second, as if the sound reminded them of something terrible...

"You know I might not come back, don't you?" Her eyes remained closed as Sebastian snatched his head in Amaya's direction. The witch seemed calm on the outside, but he could tell, just by the way of how she was breathing, that something was off. "What do you mean?" His fingers twitched as he went to bury them in the layers of his robe for some added grounding. Amaya opened her eyes with a sigh as they slowly traveled over to Sebastian. "I might not make it out alive if I have to fight Ranrok. If we can't find a way to stop him before he locates the last Repository beneath the school." – "Don't say that. Of course you'll make it out alive May." She raised a brow at the wizard in disbelief. "How would you know? You don't know what Ranrok is like. How powerful he is with Isidora's magic. He killed his own brother with just one single blow and not even I can do that. It would take the Killing Curse for me to be able to do that. Some Mongrels cease to exist at a simple Confringo, but they are just wolves... Not a dark wizard goblin with the power of thousands of magical emotions and probably some of Isidora's ancient magic as well." Amaya pinched the bridge of her nose as a sudden wave of annoyance at the circumstances washed over her. It wasn't fair... Nothing about all of this was fair. "What if you use the magic Isidora contained beneath Hogwarts?"

"There is a reason the Keepers guarded this secret so strongly, thoroughly. This is possibly the darkest magic there is and you know what Isidora said in her diary entries. How she heard the Shadows whisper to her? She lost her mind and I'm not risking that. There is no safe way to use the magic without committing to it fully." Sebastian nodded slowly as he watched the flames dance in the fireplace, working through everything she said in his mind. Eager to find a way out of the misery she seemingly faced. It was hard, knowing you had zero options while you were expected to save everyone else. "You look the way I have been feeling for weeks. Utterly and without a doubt, hopeless." Their eyes met at her words and she smiled at him reassuringly as if he was the one who suffered from these circumstances. As if he needed to be consoled. "I'm sorry you have to feel that way. But nonetheless, you won't die Amaya. You always win...." Sebastian used to despise her for it. The way she learned everything on her very first attempt and mastered things he needed years to do in a matter of seconds. She always turned out to be the better one, the stronger one and he wished for her to be bad at something just once. But now he was scared those thoughts might be her death sentence. He didn't think that way anymore, he wanted-needed her to succeed. So she could come back to him...