Time to Get Even

Pros and cons

I sat there reading and re reading my list when I felt a slight tap on my shoulder. I spun around and saw my mom hovering over me trying to look at what I wrote down.

"What are you doing?" she sat down beside me. She knew me well enough to know that I was weighing my options on something important.

"I was given an interesting proposal earlier today. Just working things out in writing" I took the piece of paper and placed it carefully on the table.  I was still trying to wrap my head around the offer and figured that talking about it out loud might help.

"I know all about it" my mom looked at me apologetically, "Marcus called me a few times, in the past few weeks, to ask specific questions.  He wanted to make sure things were done to your liking"  she averted my angry glare and started tapping away on her phone.

"You didn't think that it was important to tell me any of this? And since when have you two become such good friends? First the apartment then this?" I was angry, and hurt, but not for the obvious reasons. Marcus called and spoke to my mother...not me. He sent me flowers but carried on long conversations with her. I needed to know why. None of it made any sense.

"He wanted to help and I wanted to do what was best for you. I don't live here Ana. I don't know this city or who your real friends are. Elise and Cole turned out to be psychopaths and I was scared for you and alone. He offered that help and seemed like a genuinely good person. I'm sorry If you're upset but I'm not sorry I accepted his help" I could see she was trying to hold back the tears from escaping her eyes.

I slightly wavered, I knew things must have been difficult for her. It didn't help my feelings of rejection, but it made it easier to forgive her.

"Fine" was all I could muster and decided that this conversation was done. She nodded her head, clearly happy about her small victory, and went back to texting someone. I could see a hint of a smile as she was reading an incoming message and my curiosity peaked. I was about to ask but thought against it. I may have forgiven her internally, but externally, I wanted her to feel the sting for a little bit longer.

I left the room and made my way upstairs to take a shower. I knew I needed to get some answers and the one person who could give me those was Marcus.

With a new determination, I showered and found an outfit that I felt was right for this occasion.

The "I'm better off without you and haven't thought about you at all outfit" consisted of a pair of light distressed jeans, a white fitted tee, a light pink blazer paired with some light pink heels. It felt put together but not in a way that showed I was trying to hard.

I came down the stairs and saw that my mom retreated back to her room. Not wanting to go back upstairs, I sent her a quick text letting her know where I was going and requested an Uber.

20 min later I was on my way to make a deal with the devil himself.

I laughed a little too hard at my own joke which resulted in me getting a side stare from the driver. After some visible deliberation, I could see that the man decided I wasn't crazy and proceeded to make small conversation, with me, for the rest of the ride.

As we arrived I tipped him well and wished him the best. I learned his wife had just given birth and he was saving to take her back home to visit her parents. I hoped that someday I would find someone to love me like that.

As I stepped into the building and made my way up to the receptionist, I realized I didn't have an appointment, nor did I give him any kind of heads up I was coming.

God, I didn't even know if he was here.

I suddenly felt very stupid but tried to hide the embarrassment I was feeling.

"I'm here to speak to Marcus Ross" I glanced down at the pretty brunette sitting behind a beautiful marble desk.

"Ok, do you have an appointment? And name please" she smiled politely while her hand hovered above the keyboard waiting to be fed the information.

"I don't have an appointment and my name is Ana kolinski. If you let him know I'm here he will see me" I said confidently. The young woman studied me for a moment and decided I was worthy of a call. After a brief conversation, she gave me directions to Marcus's office and I was on my way.

As I made my way to the elevator, I was in awe of this building. I was also painfully aware that Cole never once invited me here to have lunch with him. I didn't even know what floor he worked on.

I pressed the button for the top floor and waited for the doors to close. I silently went through my talking points and cursed myself for not bringing my list. As I got closer to his floor, I felt the knot in my stomach become tighter and tighter.

I hoped that I would get through this meeting alive, but more importantly, I hoped I was able to keep my lunch down and appear confident.

The elevator doors opened and I stepped out. Looking at the big open space between me and his office, I whispered "here goes nothing" and made my way to his very stone faced gate keeper.