Cingulomania | Kaz Brekker

09

Kaz set down the small pile of belongings that the crew had left. They had found an abandoned barn to settle down in for the night. Cordelia wasn't looking too good, and Kaz didn't want to travel farther than they needed to while she was still losing blood. 

"Is this all we have left?" Inej asked. She had managed to wrap her ankle during the ride on the carriage. They hadn't had much to begin with when they crossed the Fold, but now they had even less. They had a few kruge notes and coins and Kaz's broken cane. Cordelia exhaled softly, trying not to groan out in pain too loudly, but it didn't go unnoticed as she'd hoped. 

Cordelia lifted her shirt up to examine the wound in her stomach. Inej had packed some of the wrappings she used for her ankle onto it, but it had bled through quickly. 

"Jesper, my bag," Cordelia requested. He grabbed the small bag and held it out to her, gagging at the sight of the wound. "Oh, don't be a baby." 

"Mother of Saints," Jesper muttered. Cordelia looked up at him and flicked her gaze to Kaz, who conveniently wouldn't look her in the eyes. She held her hand out to Inej, who helped lower her to a pile of straw against a wall. 

"It's not healing on its own. I need to stitch it." Cordelia said. 

"Do you want me to help you?" Inej asked. Cordelia only shook her head. 

She reached into her bag and fished for a needle and some thread. Kaz spoke up, drawing her attention to him. "How long before you can travel?"

"Not long," she replied. "Where?" 

"Ketterdam," Kaz stated. He still didn't meet her eyes. His eyes flicked between Inej and Jesper, and yet he still wouldn't look at her. Jesper looked at Kaz in disbelief. Was he seriously about to send his right hand, his best friend, back to Ketterdam alone? Kaz sighed. "Between our dwindling funds, lack of time, and conflicting interests, it's time we cut our losses."

Without another word, Kaz left the barn, his limp more pronounced. Shaking her head, Cordelia took out the needle she found from her bag and started to thread it. 

"I guess the Bastard misses the Barrel," Jesper murmured. Cordelia rolled her eyes at him and shut her eyes for a moment. She had felt a bit dizzy since they fled Ryevost. Blowing out a breath, Cordelia opened her eyes and pierced the needle through her skin. She could hear Jesper gagging. 

"You can watch a bullet tear through a man, but a needle's too much?" Inej asked him.

"Yeah, well, you see, bullets are bam, in and out," Jesper defended. "Now that. That's just..." He gagged again. Cordelia huffed out a light laugh. "Where did you learn to do that?"

Cordelia thought for a moment. "Little Palace, I think. It's been so long that I can't really remember. I think I got so tired of Healers and most Heartrenders that I took things into my own hands. Besides, people started asking so many questions when I stopped having Healers and Heartrenders flocking to me every time I came back from the Grand Palace."

"Yeah, but why would you..." Jesper started before suddenly realizing what she meant. "Oh, that's dark." 

She huffed out a small laugh before Inej started tending to her shoulder. "Which is why I can't go back. I left that palace for a reason."

"Well, if you told Kaz that story I think he'd murder the population of the Grand Palace himself," Jesper joked, picking up Kaz's broken cane. Though, Cordelia couldn't help but think that Kaz would do it. 

"Jesper, you're not hearing me," Cordelia emphasized. "I can't go back." Jesper glanced at the ground and then back to her. "What?"

"Well, I was... I was gonna tell you to trust Kaz and that he'd never let you two go back, but... I don't have the right to tell you what you should do with your shot at freedom," he said solemnly.