It Ends With Us

9.

Buck

"So how are things with you and Eddie?" Maddie asked me as she placed a cup of coffee on the table in front of me.

"Pretty good I think."

"Pretty good?" She sat down in the chair across from me.

"I mean, we've only been dating for a couple of months. I don't want to jinx anything," I shrugged.

My sister gave me a knowing look. "Yeah, no. Try again."

I rolled my eyes slightly annoyed at how well she knew me. "I don't know. I guess I just feel like he's hiding something from me."

"How so?"

I thought for a minute. "Like when I ask him questions about his life in Texas or his family, he tenses up and tries to change the subject."

"Hm." Maddie cocked her head, thinking for a minute. "Why do you think that is?"

"I don't know. Maybe he's not on good terms with anyone in his family, except his Tia Pepa."

"You could always ask Christopher about their family."

"I don't know. You don't think that'd be crossing a line?"

"Not at all! And if you get caught, just tell him you were just trying to bond with his son."

"I mean...I guess that could work. I just don't want to upset him."

"Well if he gets upset because you're trying to learn more about him, then maybe he's not the man we all thought he was," Maddie shrugged, taking another long sip of her coffee. She was right. There was absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to know more about my boyfriend and his family.

I just hope Eddie feels the same...

**********

The next afternoon, Christopher and I walked up the front steps of Eddie's house and let ourselves in. Over the past few months, I had gotten into the habit of bringing Chris home, helping him with his homework while I graded papers, and making dinner while we waited for Eddie to come home from work. "After we finish our homework, can we play video games?" Chris asked me as we both got settled at the dining room table.

"Sure buddy," I smiled at him. Before either of us could put pen to paper, we heard the front door open and shut. Eddie was home...3 hours early...

"Hey babe. What are you doing home so early?" I asked him. Eddie jumped, as if he didn't see us sitting there.

"Oh. Hey guys." He gave Chris a kiss on top of his head and me a quick peck on the lips. I could tell something was off with him.

"Is everything okay?"

"Uh...yeah. Why wouldn't it be?" he answered, walking over to the fridge and grabbing a bottle of water. He finished it in about three gulps.

Something was very wrong.

"I don't know, you just seem a little...distracted." He didn't answer me. He just stared into the distance. I waited. And waited. And waited. I walked over to him slowly and carefully. "Eddie. Talk to me," I said, gently cupping his face with my hands.

He smiled, but it seemed kind of...forced. It didn't reach his eyes. "I'm fine. Really." He gave me another quick peck before saying, "I'm gonna go take a shower," and retreating up the stairs.

I walked back over to the dining room table, but instead of going back to my work, I looked over at Christopher, who seemed unaffected by the interaction that just occurred. 'It's now or never Buckley,' I thought to myself. I sat there for a minute trying to figure out how to form my questions. "So Christopher, how are you liking L.A.?"

"It's okay. I miss my old friends, but my new friends are really cool too."

"And your dad? Is he liking it okay?" I asked nonchalantly.

"Yeah, I guess. But he's still sad sometimes."

"Sad? Why is he sad?"

"Because of what happened to my mom."

"Oh yeah, your dad told me that your mom died. I'm so sorry. Was she sick?"

"No." He didn't say anything else.

"Well what happened to her? Was she in some sort of accident?" I was on the edge of my seat now.

"Well she–"

"Buck." I froze. Eddie was standing at the bottom of the stairs. And if looks could kill, I'd have been dead a long time ago. "Can I talk to you for a minute? Outside?"

"Um yeah. Sure. No problem." I was nervous now. My heart was racing, my palms were sweaty, and I had no idea what this conversation was going to bring. We both stepped outside pulling the front door shut behind us.

Eddie whirled around to face me, his face inches from mine. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!" I'd never seen him this angry. And it scared me. Like a lot.

"I was just getting to know Christopher," I said innocently. I wondered if he could hear my voice trembling.

"Like hell you were! It sounded to me like you were prying into my personal life by grilling my son!"

"No! No, it's not like that! I swear! I just wanted to know more about you, that's all."

"Then you should have asked me directly!"

Now I was the furious one. "I have asked you directly! You never answer my questions!"

"Because it's none of your business!"

"I'm sorry, I didn't know it was a crime to wanna get to know my boyfriend!" Now I was shouting too.

"Dad, why are you yelling?" We both tensed. It was Christopher and he heard everything.

"Sorry buddy. We were just talking a little too loudly. Go back inside and finish your homework. I'll be in in a minute," Eddie said, never taking his eyes off mine. Christopher did as he was told before we continued.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" I started. "It's just...I was talking to Maddie and we both thought it was weird that–"

"Wait, hold on. Maddie told you to grill my son for information about my life?"

"Well...in a way, yeah. But it's not a big deal, okay? She was just trying to help."

Eddie sighed. "Listen, I'm sorry for snapping at you, okay? I just like for my business to be just that. My business."

"I get that, I do. I just want to know more about you. I feel like you know everything about me, but I know next to nothing about you." I pouted a little to try to lighten the mood. I didn't want either of us to be mad at the other any more.

It must have worked, because he cracked a small smile. "How about once Chris is in bed, we sit down and I'll answer any question you want?" he said, pulling me towards him by my waist. I smiled nodding my head at him. But after the look I just saw in his eyes, I didn't want to ask him anything else.

And I think he knew that.