✧˖°Ship name: Hyunjin x Felix (Hyunlix)
✧˖°Type of story:Angst and sad
♥︎Felix's Pov♥︎
I volunteer at the hospital every day but today, I see someone at the hospital who has dark black hair like a Raven's wing. I stand at the door admiring the man for a couple of moments as I am shocked that someone so young is hooked up to so many machines.
The male is currently sleeping when one of his amber leaf looking eyes falls directly on mine. "You can come in if you like, I don't mind visitors,I don't hardly see the light of day anymore. But I don't think I can do that anymore."
Even though this isn't a part of my volunteer work,I still want to hear this man's story, make him feel like he is normal even if it is just for a little while. I nod walking into the hospital room. I bring the chair close to his bedside as that gesture alone is enough to make me tear up.
"Hello,my name is Lee Yongbok,but you can call me Felix." I reach my hand over to him as he shakes my hand beaming happiness despite his serious and dark demeanor beforehand.
"Hwang Hyunjin,I'm glad to see that someone still remembers me. I only see nurses at best. I guess they wish that I would kill over one of these days so I wont have to have so much medicine through the IV"
"Please, that isn't true. But when I get my doctor's degree,I will be your doctor I hope. For now I'm just a volunteer for some experience."
I watch as his expression darkens again before he shakes his head looking at me "Don't get your hopes up on that,they don't expect me to live over a year." His eyes fill with sorrow as my heart even hurts for him.
I'll look to see what he has later as I want to show him that I want to know more than what disease he has or what to treat it with. "There is always hope,after all your lucky dragon is here" I smile as he pokes my cheek laughing.
"Okay, you are my luck,please stay for a while." So I did and I would stay with him the days I had off from college and volunteering. I would even spend my nights there. I would eventually share the same bed with him even.
A few more months passed by and we became lovers. Granted, we couldn't make love or anything that would upset his heart but that didn't mattered to me. What I knew about him and being around him is enough for me.
After all,only 10% of his heart is working now. It slowly is getting lower and weaker as my heart slowly gets more and more sad for him. Sad that one day I know he won't be roaming this earth or that I won't be able to hear his laugh one more time.
That I won't be able to hold his hand while he sleeps in my arms. I'm halfway done with my degree but I can tell that he won't make it that long. I know he won't,I've looked at the imagining myself.
His eyes are still so hopeful which is the only thing that gives me hope these days. But secretly on my way to work I would scream why or cry my eyes out until I was empty.
Today is one of those days as I get one of the worst news of my life. "Anything new doctor?" Dr.Banhg knows my secret as he works the night shift at the hospital. He is the cardiologist of the hospital,one of the best in Korea even.
"I'm afraid I'm going to break some news to you a week early to prepare you. Hwang needs a heart donor, his heart might not even make it past this week. We are surprised that he even made it this far."
My heart sinks as I nod before walking into my car forgetting all the Korean that I have learned "WHY HIM? WHY?" I bang my hands angrily on the steering wheel before gripping it.
"He still have so much time-" I begin to choke up as tears fall down my eyes like raindrops. This isn't fair. I know life isn't fair and I know that but why couldn't he get better?
I grip the steering wheel as my knuckles turn white as the tears drip down my face more. That is until I hear my phone ring "Lee Yongbok,How may I help you?"
"It's Hwang" The panic in Dr.Banhg's voice is enough to scare me but I hear him running which makes me wipe my tears quickly. "We have to take him into emergency surgery or the ICU"
"Why?" I ask him as I am running into the hospital as my ID is still hanging around my neck.
"His heart is failing him just like I feared, I need to find a suitable heart donor soon"
"Can I at least say goodbye to him?" I hear silence on the other side as I hear him curse.
"There's no donor's" My heart shatters like glass but I know one option and I hand Dr.Bahng a letter when I get in.
♡Hyunjin's Pov♡
I woke up to see Dr.Bahng sitting at the end of the bed smiling but had a somber look on his face. Where's Felix? I begin to panic as I don't know where he is. "Where is Yongbok?" I ask him as he is more like a friend to Felix than anything else.
"The surgery was a success, Hwang. You can go home next week if it tests well. But there shouldn't be a problem." Why is he not answering my question?
"Where is Lee Yongbok?"
"Don't overstress your heart,for now focus on recovering."
"What operation did I have?" I don't trust this doctor.
"How did you know you did?" I don't want those psychological games. I want fucking answers.
"Tell me Chan '' I'm not supposed to know my doctor's name but I do. Because Felix told me. Felix made the hospital tolerable, he made my life brighter.
"Let your body heal, afterwards I will tell you." He says before walking out of the room.
"DAMN IT, ONE FUCKING QUESTION. WHY?" My heart is fine now even though before it was barely working. What changed?
I waited a week, I am getting discharged today. I get to go back into the sunlight again and get back to normal life. I can take Felix out on a true first date and kiss him under the moonlight. To see the stars and moon again without the window glare,without moving around machinery will be true heaven to me.
Chan hands me a sheet of paper "This will explain everything although I suggest reading it when you get home." I do as he says as I sit down on the couch.
This is what the letter said 'If you are reading this, congratulations, you have survived. You have made it so far,and I am so proud of you. Freedom tastes good huh? How does the sunlight feel? Feels good huh?. I'm sorry that I couldn't be by your side during your first taste of freedom in years.'
The pang of relief of everything that I have been through hits me as happy tears stroke my face.
'I'm sure as you are reading this letter, you are probably thinking,where am I? Well just read on. I want to say meeting you is a miracle, you brought me so many happy memories and taught me about real and pure love. I have never been so happy with someone other than you'
Why does this seem so happy but there are little stains fresh and old on the paper and erasing marks.
'There are many nights once you would sleeping that I would spend looking at medicines to help you,or treatments. Or even any type of testing that you did while watching your chest rise and fall out of the corner of my eye because I'm afraid that you would slip away at any moment.'
He's sweet,sometimes I wonder what I did to deserve him.
'But I would never find that solution no matter how hard I tried. Now to the answer that you are desperately working to now I know. Because I know you. Just know that I love you for infinity and I would never do this if I didn't want to.'
This is scaring me, my chest going fast is unfamiliar to me and yet why do I still feel so unhappy about it? I should be feeling happy and celebrating, doing all the things I didn't do now that I'm not dying.
'The truth that Chan didn't tell you is your heart is too weak to survive like it was. The heart that is in your body isn't yours anymore. You had an emergency heart transplant. The heart is mine Hyunjin,I can be with you forever now. I will become your luck forever now'
