GROWING UP VALENTINE ALWAYS FELT WEIRD. Since she turned 5 she started noticing the random things, the little things girls at her age shouldn't worry about. Maybe it was because her sister was more older and mature, and at some nights she stared at her as she looked into the mirror, grabbing onto her belly fat and picked at her body hair.
So she started to do the same.
Closing her door shut silently, 5 year old Valentine didn't know what was the issue with herself but she started to pick things out just like how Jasmine did. It didn't really make sense, but she wanted to be like her older sister,
So she started hating herself like she did.
Sometimes she grabbed hair ties and grabbed her chubby stomach and tied it up in a ponytail, turning to the side pretending her side view of the pulled skin was the front view.
She started to get even 'weirder' at 8, experimenting in clothes, getting a weird liking to the color white. And tried to straighten her curly hair and it didn't turn out well, but she felt pretty, so she kept it.
It was September 5th, the lights where dim and the sun was setting, she sat in front of her mom with fumbling thumbs. She was in trouble, well for hitting somebody. A girl at her school made fun of her, the way she dressed, her acne, her hair, her chubby cheeks.
"Valentine, hunny, sometimes you have to back away from some situations. And you know, what's wrong with being different, you know, you are unique in your own way!" Her mothers tone was soft, trying her best to be uplifting,
"But mom I'm not different, I'm normal like everyone else."
Her mothers mouth opened about to say something, but then closed it. Forcing a uncomfortable smile on her face. "Your right, I don't even know why I said it like that."
She patted her hand lightly, rushing back upstairs.
Valentine was feeling the nostalgia of 5-8 year old her again, her presence like a dark cloud in the corner of the classroom. The teacher told everyone to partner up, but she didn't have a partner. Maybe it wasn't something so serious, but even people who didn't get chose first were invited to work in groups of three.
"It's not even that serious," she mumbled go herself as words of affirmation, even tho her hand felt weak as she wrote and eyes tested up. Valentine was used to the feeling, so she knew she could go though it again. And if she didn't have anyone to partner up with, she could partner up with herself.
Valentine just repeated in her head that she was bigger than whatever was making her anxious. And a silly little thing like not having a partner won't tarnish her life, don't let it get to you, just continue having a good day.
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"I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS LEXI. . ." She said nervously fiddling with her fingers, the make up brush dabbing against her skin harshly. Valentine side eyeing to the far right of the room as Cassie was doing her makeup. The lights was dim as glitter decorated her skin, brown eyes beaming into the mirror as she yawned lightly.
