We met in September

CHAPTER 7

Andrew

I can still feel her soft fingers on my hand. Her smooth skin pressed between mine, I am staring at my hand, staring at my open palm, the same place I had her hand earlier.

I am just staring at my hand, sitting in the couch while Mason is talking, talking about something but I am too busy to hear it.

"Are you even listening to what I'm saying?" Mason says

I turn my head towards him, seeing him standing across me "Umm....no?"

"Wow" he says "whatever it's okay, tell me where were you" he takes a sit next to me

"And how long are you gonna keep that hand in front of your face like that?" he says and I turn towards him, keeping my hand down

"So how was your day at school?" I say with a small smile, he makes a weird face and says "Did you get possessed again?"

I roll my eyes, "What did you come here for today"

"Okay this is better" Mason says, "Conrad is fucking pissed at you" he says resting his head on the couch

"Why?" I ask, turning my head towards him

"You know why" Mason says turning towards me while his head is still resting on the couch, his eyes slowly go down and pause, he lifts his head up "Is that a lighter?"

Oh shit

I look down towards my hoodie pocket and see the lighter slightly coming out, I quickly grab it and completely push it down the pocket, "Hey! That's a lighter right?" He straighten up in a sitting position.

"Oof fuck off" I look away from him

"Why are you hiding it?" He asks.

"I'm hiding nothing" I look at him, annoyed

He's silent looking towards me with a serious face, so serious it will be hard to believe it's the same cheery talkative guy, who wants to dress up as a dog for Halloween "You are smoking?" He asks, in a serious voice just like his face

I let out a small laugh "The fuck is up with you"

"Andrew" he says it like a warning "you are smoking aren't you?"

I sigh and look away from him

"Answer me"

"Yes I am!" I burst out, "what you gonna do about it huh? Kill me?" I turn towards him expecting him to shout back at me but he's just sitting there silent

"What happened" he says quietly with strangely soft eyes like he's about to cry, "what happened to you" he says again

"I'm sorry if I wasn't able to be a support for you, I'm so sorry" now it seriously looks like he's about to cry, "I thought I was helping you, I thought I was bringing you back, I'm so sorry" he continues looking like he's about to cry any second

"Mason stop, don't be sorry" I say putting a hand on his shoulder

"No I have to" he says looking straight in my eyes, again with that serious look of his.
"What's the point of being a best friend if you're not able to come and talk with me, let out your thoughts, your burden, I have been such a bad friend"

"Mason no it's not you. I am the problem okay? It's me, I am the one who picked up the cigarettes not you" I say looking back at his ocean like blue eyes about to turn into a real ocean.

"No it's my fault. I failed to support you, I failed as a friend, I failed" he says with his head down.

"When did it start?" he lifts his head up, looking towards me. I look away from him and say "Um like a week after the funeral"