Fallen Petals and Stolen Kisses (A hanahaki Story)

Panic Attack

I can't breathe.
There's not enough air entering my body.
I try to make up for it, but I continue to feel suffocated.
What the hell is happening to me?

I'm scared...

The movie pauses and the lack of noise quiets me. Anxiety coursing through my body.
What if they see me like this?
I can't move though.

"Does anyone know where Denki went? He's been gone a while." It sounds like Shinsou says.

"I think he went to get a snack or something. But you're right he has been gone a while. Izuku, you were the last one in the kitchen, did you see him?" Monoma says.

"I didn't see him actually. Maybe he's going to the bathroom." Midoriya lies. It's very convincing.

"Maybe I should check on him..." Shinsou says, his voice betraying his worry. I hear him start to get up.

"No!" Sero recovers from his little outburst quickly, with knowing him, a smile. "No, it's fine I'll check on him."

"Chill out he's probably fine." Bakugo says, clearly annoyed.

"I'm going to check anyway because I'm his friend, unlike you guys who use him to charge your phone and make fun of him when he's overloaded from his quirk!" Sero sounds angry. I wonder why he'd be angry, that stuff is what friends do.

"That's not fair!" I hear Mina argue.

"Is it not? Has your little 'squad' even noticed Denki isn't doing well? No. Only I, Shinsou, and Monoma care about him enough to care! I'm sick of it. Now watch your damn movie exile I make sure my friend is okay." Sero, defending me once again, says. I hear footsteps enter the kitchen and I press myself as far back into the little space as I can manage, hands covering my mouth so he can't hear me.

I see him walk past. Before I can stop it, a soft sob escapes my throat and I realize I'm crying. I wipe the tears immediately but more keep coming.

Still not enough air.
Why can't I breathe?
My lungs hurt.

Sero walks back towards me and crouches down to check my little hiding spot.

"Oh, Denki..." Sero reaches out for me, but I flinch away. "What happened?"

He lets his arms drop as he sits next to me under the island. I shake my head and he sighs.

"Can I touch you?" He asks softly and after a minute I nod. He pulls Me into him and hugs me, rubbing the back of my head softly. "Are you okay? You don't have to tell me what happened I just want to know-..." He trails off as eyes land on my bruised wrist. He picks it up gingerly to make sure he isn't seeing things, but I yank it away. I hide my wrist in my Pikachu pajama pocket.  "Denki, tell me what happened. Was it Midoriya?"

"Nothing!" I exclaim through little gasps as I try to get air In.

"Denki take a deep breath with me. Okay, In..." I take a breath in with him. "And out..."

We exhale after a pause. We continue this little ritual until I can breathe again.

"Denki, you were having a panic attack. I'm worried about you, with the bruises on your wrist," He scans my body quickly, his eyes widening slightly as he sees the probably nasty bruise forming on my cheek. "And your cheek. And your unwillingness to tell me. I know something is up Pikachu. And I need you to tell me before I have to resort to getting Aizawa or having either Shinsou or Monoma use a mind control quirk on you."

"Y-you wouldn't!" I cough at their names, the thought of their worry filling my mind...

"If I have to I will. You know I don't want to, but I need you safe."

"I went a little too hard during training with Midoriya."

"The marks weren't there before."

"I guess they just took a while to form."

"You're lying to me."

"I'm not lying."

"Yes, you are."

"Whatever." I crawl out from the space, Sero following right behind we as we walk to my room. "It's not like it matters anyway, I'm going to die soon."

"Don't say that."

"Why not? It's true."

"I'll get you the surgery, Ill swear to it."

"No, you won't. It's too expensive and even if it wasn't, I don't want it. I refuse to forget them. I simply won't do it and you can't force me."

"Then you'll confess!"

"I won't and you know it. I'm not going to deal with the heart break or hear them call me a freak."

"Dude, I can't just watch you do this to yourself. For my own sanity, this friendship will have to end. I'm not going to watch my best friend do this to himself so you're on your own now unless you do what you need to do." Were outside my dorm now, I open the door and turn to face him in the door way.

"Fine. Leave. I didn't need you anyway! Fuck off then. Go."

"Alright then. Youve made your choice so don't blame me for this." He looks sad and frustrated and I just want to hug him, but I stand my ground. He turns around and walks away.

"GOOD RIDDANCE!" I slam my door shut behind me as I enter my room. 

Why did I do that? Im such a fuck up, why did I ruin that?

I slide to the ground against my door and sob quietly. 

I grab my razor blade but remember that I recently sliced my thighs so that wasnt an option anymore.

But with Sero gone...

The blade slices into my wrist as soon as the sleeve of my onesie is pulled away. 

I slice until theres no space left, Not bothering to clean up as I go to my bed and lay there until I eventually Fall asleep.

Hello everyone! I'm not sure how long this fic will be but I'm trying to make it at least 10 chapters. One thing I've noticed about hanahaki AUs is that they're always really short and that used to frustrate me, I'm starting to learn why though, it makes a better short story or side plot then a long fic so now I know not to judge. And Questions for all my lovely readers, do you understand why Denki is doing what he is? Or is it not written in a way where that's presented? Do you think Sero is in the wrong for leaving Denki in his current state? 

Personally, I agree with Sero but understand where Denki is coming from, Being as he had just relived his traumatic childhood and wasn't doing well anyway. But obviously Sero didn't know this and didn't think Denki had or would be relapsing.

-Love Saturn