chapter 22 - changes

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A/N: Just a warning, this is not edited at all. 

Y/N's POV-

Over the next few weeks, I develop a routine. I wake up at 7:00 am, go for a run, shower, and then make myself breakfast. Only a few others are awake at that time. Steve and Nat are typically up working out, and Tony is often working away in his lab. Bucky and I leave for therapy at 9:05 am. I have my session at 9:30 am with a separate therapist, Dr. Stevens. Dr. Stevens prefers to let me control the conversation, especially at the beginning. He talks me through different treatments. He gifted me a notebook to write in throughout the week. I bring it with me to our sessions and we talk about noteworthy events.

Kate has given me space while I focus on healing. We still hang out a lot at the compound, whether it's movies, game nights, baking, etc.

Typically, I do some combat training around 1 pm, sometimes with the team. I am still not sure whether I want to commit to the team, but it does feel good to fight. I've done it for as long as I can remember. I love sparring with Peter and Kate, we always have fun. However, sparring with Steve, Bucky, and Nat push me.

"Hey, Y/n!" Steve calls to me. I am lounging on a couch in the living room when Steve strolls through. I lift my head out of the book I was reading, "What's up Capsicle?"

Steve walks up to the couch, "We've got a lead on Rumlow. Nat, Wanda, Sam, and I are flying to Lagos in an hour to go after him. If you want, you can join. Though, I understand if you don't."

The thought of Rumlow makes me angry. Not sad or scared like it used to be, angry. I want revenge. Revenge for all the fucked up shit he did to me. That he allowed Hydra to do to me. "Yes. I want to go." I say the words. Confident. 

Steve smiles, "Okay then, I'll see you in an hour."

I waltz into the lab, finding Tony staring at some algorithm. He doesn't lift his head to acknowledge me. Typical. "Nice to see you too."

Tony turns at the sound of my voice, "Y/n! I am so sorry, this problem has been killing me. I honestly didn't hear you come in. What can I do for you?"

I take a deep breath, "I was wondering if you had an extra suit or something that I could wear on a mission?" My voice is weak. If Rumlow were here he would call me pathetic. But he's not and I'm gonna make sure that he never gets the chance again. 

"Wait, what mission?"

"Steve asked if I wanted to tag along to go after Rumlow."

Tony smiles, "I'm proud of you. I can't imagine it's easy. On the topic of a suit though, I may have drawn up some designs in case this day came around." I can't help but laugh. Of course, Tony would already have a suit designed for me. "Why don't you take a look at some options? Then I'll measure you real quick and print it."

"Sounds great."

Tony had 4 suits designed for me. All are somewhat similar to Nat's. Practical. I choose the one with a dark red/maroon vest and accents. Tony even added two loops on the back to hold my batons. Well his batons, he made new ones with 'upgrades'. I watch in amazement as Tony sends the design to his hologram table. He does something with his hands that makes the design 3D. 

Tony walks me through the design, asking for feedback. Once he's satisfied, he sends the design to his fancy printer. He grabs a tape measure, quickly takes down my measurements, and programs them into the machine. I am fascinated as the machine begins to create material seemingly out of thin air. 

It is difficult, but I manage to tear myself away to get ready for the mission. I put on a plain tank top to wear underneath the suit and athletic shorts to wear in the meantime. I then dutch braid both sides of my head down to my neck and secure them with a ponytail holder. I wrap the remaining hair into a bun. 

Once I'm ready I meet Tony back in the lab. The suit is printed and ready along with combat boots that have a slight heel. I try it on, it fits like a glove. It's very comfortable, even the boots. Lastly, Tony presents me with my new batons. I thank him excessively before meeting the rest of the team. 

Nat and Wanda are already on the Quinjet when I arrive. "Hey, Y/n. I was so happy to hear that you're tagging along." Nat smiles.  "Agreed," Wanda nods, "I don't think we've ever outnumbered the boys on a mission." I laugh. Oh, the small things. "I'm happy to help." I say before heading over to the weapons compartment. 

"If you're looking for a gun, you can borrow mine." Nat suggests. I open the locker labeled 'Romanoff'. I select a handgun from her collection, "Thanks, Nat. Do you know, does anyone else use knives?" 

"Barnes does. They're in the second drawer from the left."

I thank her again before sorting through my options. Once I find one, I slide the knife and handgun into their holsters. 

Steve and Sam arrive together, exactly on time. "Nice to have you, Y/n." Sam nods. 

"Thanks."

"Okay, let's get wheels up, Romanoff." Steve orders. 

Nat heads into the cockpit. The four of us strap into our seats as the jet powers up. "Here we go." Nat calls. 


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