A Loveless Marriage: A Bridgerton Story

Chapter 17

"How was it?" Katie asked her daughter.

"It is wonderful, thank you so much Mama," Kathryn smiled.

Today was Kathryn's birthday. She was having dinner with her mother and sister. The Bridgerton's had a ball to attend but promise to have dinner tomorrow night to celebrate. The way they talked birthdays were a big celebration in their house. Kathryn was fine spending her actually birthday with her mother and sister.

This way she did not have to fake putting on a happy smile, she was genuinely happy. After their fight, Kathryn had not spoken to Anthony. He has tried to talk to her a few times but she would always ignore him.

"I cannot believe my eldest is three and twenty," Katie smiled, "I remember the day you were born like it was just yesterday.

"Mother there is no need to get all gushy about it," Kathryn said.

Truthfully she was a bit sad because this was her first birthday since her father's passing.

"I should probably be heading home soon," Kathryn said.

"Wait. There is one more thing I must give you before you leave," Katie said.

Katie got up and walked into the next room and Kathryn turned to her sister.

"What do you think it is?" Kathryn asked.

"I have no idea," Alia said.

Katie came back into the room holding two small boxes.

"Now I know that it's your birthday," Katie said to Kathryn, "But I have something for Alia too."

Their mother sat the two boxes in front of the girls. Kathryn picked up her box as she glanced at her sister. Kathryn opened the box and inside it, she saw the most beautiful necklace she had ever laid eyes on. It was a gold chain that had a smile emerald pendant hanging from it. Emerald was their father's birthstone.

"Is this from...

"Your father," Katie smiled, "He has been keeping them for years and wanted to wait until the perfect time to give them to you. I know that he was gone he would want you to have them now. So that you can carry a piece of him with you everywhere you go."

"It is absolutely beautiful," Kathryn smiled up at her mother, "This would forever be her favorite birthday present."

--

Arriving back home, the house was silent. Kathryn presumed everyone was still at the ball, the younger kids upstairs asleep. Kathryn was not the least bit tired. She should have stayed at her mother's for longer. But truthfully she felt like she needed some alone time.

Kathryn soon found herself standing in front of a partially painted canvas. She had yet painted anything since her father died. She had not had any inspiration, nothing to paint, until tonight. After hours of work, Kathryn took a step back examining the painting. Something so familiar to her, yet this one was so different.

It was her family's garden, exactly how it looked on that last day her father was on earth, and right there in the middle was her family. They all sat along a bench, shoulder to shoulder. Though you could only see the backs of their heads, you could feel the happiness radiating off of them. That was the last day that Kathryn felt truly happy.

"You are painting again," someone said behind her.

Kathryn turned around to see Anthony standing in the doorway, the same way he had the night he returned to Aubrey Hall. She turned back around looking at the painting, not wanting to speak to him.

"What is it supposed to be," Anthony said walking farther into the room.

Again, Kathryn did not say anything.

"Giving me the silent treatment?" Anthony asked.

"I do not wish to fight with you this evening," Kathryn said.

"I do not wish to fight with you either," Anthony said.

"Please. Every conversation we have ends up in a fight," Kathryn said, "Why should this one be any different?"

"Because it is your birthday," Anthony said, "People should not fight on their birthdays."

Kathryn let out a laugh, "Like you care that it is my birthday."

Silence fell over the two for a moment.

"I just came to wish you a happy birthday," Anthony said.

"You do not get to do that," Kathryn said turning around to look at Anthony.

"To wish you a happy birthday?" Anthony asked.

"That too but that is not what I am talking about," Kathryn said.

"Then what exactly are you talking about?" Anthony asked.

"You do not get to say that you do not love me and ignore me the majority of the time and then get to tell me happy birthday," Kathryn said.

"It is really not that serious," Anthony said, "I did not come here to argue with you. I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday."

Anthony turned and started to walk out of the door.

"Say you do not love me," Kathryn said making Anthony stop in his tracks.

"I beg your pardon?" Anthony said looking back at his wife.

"You claim that you cannot love. You claim that you cannot love me. You say that I should not love," Kathryn said, "But you have never once looked me in my eyes and told me that you do not love me."

"I did not come here to have this conversation with you," Anthony said turning to walk away again.

Kathryn grabbed ahold of his arm, "Tell me you do not love me and I will leave you be."

"Drop it," Anthony said pulling his arm away from the girl.

"I will not. I cannot accept the fact until I hear those words come out of your mouth," Kathryn said, "Because no matter how many times you have told me that you cannot love me I still love you. You push me away time after time and I cannot help but still love you."

"Please," Anthony said turning his back to the girl.

"Say that you do not love me," Kathryn said.

"I cannot!" Anthony yelled turning back to the girl, "How could anyone not love you? You are the kindest most selfless person that I have ever met. But at the same time, you are not afraid to stand up for yourself when you know that you are right. Whenever you are happy, and I mean truly happy these little dimples appear right above your smile. You can only see them if you are looking for them. So I cannot tell you that I do not love you because that would be a lie. You are all I think about, day and night. The only thing that inhabits my brain. I have tried to distance myself because I cannot get close to you. I do not wish to ever hurt you like the night I saw you break when your father died. I have seen heartbreak like that twice in my life. Once in my mother when my father died and once in you when your father died. So don't you see I cannot love you because when I inevitably leave you I do not want to put you through that pain. But you make it so damn hard not to love you. I cannot tell you that I do not love you, because I do. I love you Kathryn, more than the air I need to breathe."